Darker And Colder

4.21: Katniss And Peeta (And Haymitch)

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17th May

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Chapter 70
Haymitch's POV

"Finally," I say as Katniss and Peeta stand, staring blankly, in front of me. "Took you long enough, eh? Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for you but did you not think earlier?"

"There was more about it, Haymitch," Katniss spits.

"Oh, no I know, but still-"

Peeta glares at me. "You know I've not been well."

"Of course, but-"

"No buts," he says, "we were never going to have a wedding if it made either of us uncomfortable, but now we're both okay, and that's why only now."

I sigh. "I know, I was just... you know, never mind. Go on, go start planning the extravagant day."

"I don't want extravagance," Katniss interjects. "I want a normal ceremony. Some flowers, people we care about, food, dancing. Finnick and Annie's wedding was beautiful, but I don't want anything like that."

I smile. "No, of course."

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30th May

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The planning doesn't end up taking long, and it's somehow the wedding before I know it.

I throw on a shirt and stare at a bottle for a long time.

My hand automatically reaches for it, but I try everything to stop myself, groaning as I put it down, my mind aching for release. No, I tell myself, I promised them.

It takes everything I have to ignore it as I down a glass of water.

For some reason I expect there to be some fancy clothes delivered to me, but there isn't. Instead, I throw on a shirt that's not stained, black trousers, a blue tie that I'd forgotten I had and a blue blazer. Looking in the mirror, the blue looks a little weird with the black.

Well, I guess I'm just going to have to get some more clothes. Ones that aren't too big, too small or have red marks on them from wine.

I go back down and see the bottles- I mean, I've always noticed they were there, but now is the first time I've properly seen them, and it strikes something in my blood. No matter how much I feel like I need the spirit's fire in my veins, a new fire takes over, and I throw my arms so the next thing I know is that two dozen glass bottles smash to the floor, alcohol mixing and filling the air with its smell. I start to gag at it, grab a broom and try to sweep away the fragments of glass. A shard catches my ankle and I curse wildly as it digs in.

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I stride to the place in the middle of the meadow, where yellow flowers reflect the sun's light in a beautiful array of their own. Rows of chairs sit in a small clearing next to a Willow tree, a clear line where the fence used to be.

"Haymitch, what happened?" Asks the voice of Hazelle Hawthorne behind me.

I turn to her and smile, "Nothing, I'm fine."

"There's blood on your shoes," she replies, looking concerned.

I look down as if I didn't know that it was there. "So there is. Oh well, where were you planning to sit?"

"Are you sure you're okay," Hazelle insists, "I mean, if it's bleeding..."

"Trust me, I'm fine," I smile. "Come on, we should get good seats or something, probably."