Darker And Colder

1.05: The Train

Chapter 5
Peeta's POV

" I volunteer as tribute."

My voice rings out clear across the square. Haymitch tries to stop me, but I won't let him. I need to protect Katniss.

Out of nowhere, peacekeepers come and drag us to the train.

"New procedure," one of then says to Katniss. I want them to get their hands off us, but if I fight, they will probably hurt her.

I stare out to my family one last time, and find my new family, Katniss's mother and Prim. And I can see the pain in their eyes.

♤♤♤

On the train I find Katniss, and go to sit with her.

"We can write letters. It will give them a piece of us to hang on to anyway." I say this, but of course we both know it's not the same. She turns to wrap her arms around me, hugging me so tight I struggle for breath. I return the hug, and kiss her forehead.

"It's going to be okay, I know that sounds stupid," I say, and it does sound stupid, but it's the only way I can think to comfort her. "I promise you are going to be okay."

I just about hear her slightly muffled voice, "no."

"Katniss?"

"It's never going to be okay. Never. At least one of us is going to die in that arena, and if it's you I will never forgive myself, and I don't think it's possible any more that I could cope without you."
This hits me hard. She knows I love her, and she's kissed me enough times and done things with me that I know she must share the affection, but I have never heard her say this before.
And it brings both love and pain.

♤♤♤

Katniss's POV

I scream out of a nightmare, terrified. After a few seconds I feel Peeta's arms around me.

When I am fully calmed down, he suggests watching more clips of the old Games. We decide to watch the 50th Hunger Games- the one Haymitch won. I see the small act he did to save his life at the end. Was that really what the Capitol took as rebellious? Even that tiny thing?

When we finish watching I feel as if I understand Haymitch more, and the Capitol less. Lost inbetween realities.