The Great Pretender

Chapter 8: Where Did That Come From?!

Vaughn Miguel

I feel soooo bad, and it can never happen again.

Iyon ang nasa isipan ko habang nagmamaneho ako patungo sa bahay kung nasaan si Kamila. After what I did, I immediately washed the evidence down the drain. I finished my shower like nothing happened. I walked out of the apartment and I bought her food as usual.

Whatever I did in the shower is never gonna happen again. It was a slip, a mistake, a lapse of judgement, and a moment of weakness.

Moment of weakness pero dalawang beses? Okay, Miguel.

I shook my head when my subconscious butted in.

Fine. I did it twice...

But that's it. That will be the last time. My self-control is stronger this time.

Bumuntong hininga ako nang makapasok na ako sa metal gates ng bahay.

I drop the food. I leave. I don't look or talk. That's it. I can never interact with the bad, bad, bad, temptation. I have to contain this wrong carnal desire that I have for her, because I can never have her.

That's the line that I do not want to and cannot cross. Not only because I hate her but because I will be in so-much-fudging trouble.

Pagka-park ko ng sasakyan ay huminga muna ako nang malalim. The smell of the Tapsilog, and other food that I bought from Jesse's filled my nostrils. I reached for the visor mirror and pulled it down. I looked at my reflection.

"You don't look or talk," I said as I looked at myself. "You walk away and don't do anything stupid." I added.

I had to take three more deep breaths bago ako tuluyang bumaba dala ang isang malaking paperbag ng pagkain. Matapos ang ilang hakbang ay naabot ko na ang front door. Instead of holding the knob and turning it open, tinitigan ko lamang iyon.

Am I seriously this scared to see her? This is so ridiculous.

"Miguel, come on. We don't look, we just drop the food." I said again like a fool, bago ko tuluyang binuksan ang pintuan. Nang makapasok ako ay nakayuko lamang ako. All I can see is the tiled floor, but I can hear upbeat music from the T.V and thumping sounds of her feet on the floor.

"Hey!" Bati niya sa akin. Mabilis kong ibinaba ang paperbag sa sahig.

I must leave now bago pa siya makalapit, but the hórny side of my brain wants to look.

I can't, I can't. Don't look, don't look, alis na, alis na!---

My head tipped forward to look at her. So much for stronger self control, Miguel.

Nakatayo siya sa gitna ng living room, the t.v was glowing behind her. May parang fitness show doon na nagpe-play.

My throat ran dry and I felt all my blood rushed back to my testicles when I stared at her.

Her face is sweaty and her red hair is tied in a high ponytail. Balot ng pawis ang suot niyang puting t-shirt at shorts.

What she was wearing was not the problem.

The problem is, it is drenched in sweat and I can basically see her bra—--no, she's not wearing any.

Oh, my gosh. My balls ached so bad. I have to go now or else I will do things I cannot do.

She just smiled while her chest was heaving.

"You should try zumba, it's fun, big bo—"

Mabilis kong ibinaba ang bag sa sahig at halos tumakbo palabas. I quickly got into my car and drove out.