My Love In Another World [COMPLETED✓]

Chapter 5.

Chapter 5.

A night after coming back from Hazel's house, I locked myself in my room.

Not really in my room, pero nasa bathroom ako, nakatitig, nakatingin sa aking repleksyon sa salamin habang pinapakiramdaman ang sarili.

Sinusubukan ko kung maririnig ko ba ulit ang boses ng lalaki sa aking isipan kung titigan ko muli ang aking repleksyon sa salamin.

Actually, I was kind of suspicious about my idea. Since nung unang beses kong narinig ang boses niya, I was not looking on a mirror nor was I even near one. I just heard it without any notice of it happening, and that's it!

But still, I think it would be a great assurance for me to be near a mirror and wait to hear the voice. Atleast in this case, I would be able to make sure that the voice was truly just in my head and not anywhere else.

Habang naghihintay, nakapagisip-isip ako.

I was really scared and taken aback when I heard his voice back in Hazel's house. Even more so after learning that he could also hear me. What is more scary than hearing something that you couldn't see?

And yet, here I am now, ironically waiting for the voice to reappear again.

I know the fear and scared was evident on my voice back then when I speak to the voice, however, the fact that the voice remain calm and gentle while talking to me, kahit na parang naglolokohan lang kami doon, I think,

'He is nice?'

He could be nice, or not. I couldn't really tell. Hindi naman ako katulad ng iba diyan na kayang husgahan kung masama ba o mabuti ang isang tao sa boses lamang. Wala akong ganoong kakayahan. I don't have a sharp instincts or whatever shaling-shaling inner powers achuchu.

Napakunot naman ang aking noo.

'I have been standing here for a while yet nothing is happening, doesn't this mean this is ineffective?'

Tanong ko sa sarili ko.

Kung susumahin, magsa-sampung minuto na akong nakatayo sa harapan ng salamin habang walang ginagawa.

It's not like staring at my own reflection in the mirror is bothersome, it's just that, staring at yourself for too long is kinda uncomfortable.

I retracted my gaze and look away. Buntong hininga akong lumabas ng bathroom saka dumiretso sa aking higaan.

"Too bad. Marami pa naman akong gustong itanong sa kaniya..." Sabi ko sa sarili ko habang naglalakad papunta sa aking kama. Patamad akong humilata sa aking kama nang bigla akong makarinig ng pamilyar na boses sa aking isipan.

• That's very fortunate as I too, had a lot of things to asked.

Napatayo naman ako bigla mula sa pagkakahiga at nang marinig ko ang boses na kanina ko pa hinihintay at patanong na nagsalita.

"You--, I mean your voice...?"

• My voice should not change compare to yesterday, however, hearing your puzzlement, you must have had thought of things before this that made your reaction towards hearing my voice, lightly.

Pirmeng sabi niya sa utak ko. His voice was still the same as yesterday. It was still very soothing and smooth to hear, however, after sorting out my thoughts earlier before this, his voice became a bit different than what my memory implies. Or is it just my own mind deceiving me?

Napakunot naman ako ng noo.

"Saglit lang ah, sigurado ka bang nagsasalita ka sa utak ko? Baka meron kalang tinanim sa tenga ko kaya parang naririnig kita mula sa loob looban ko." Nanunurong sabi ko. Narinig ko naman siyang nagpakawala ng malalim na buntong hininga.

• How would I even know whether you could hear my voice in your mind or not? The only reason I knew you could hear me is because you are responding to me. I will have never talk to you if you hadn't responded to me yesterday.

Seryosong sabi niya, natahimik naman ako.

He was right.

He wouldn't have known that I could hear him if I had not responded back to him before.

• And not to mention, I am practically nonexistent there, am I right?

Tanong ulit niya. Napatango tango naman ako.

• Even if I wanted to, it's impossible for me to plant something in your head. And, why the hell would I ever do that? I'm not a creep, nor was I a pervert. And there is no reason for me to do that to you, I don't know you.

I clicked my tongue and spoke.

"Yes, yes, point granted, pointed granted. Naiintidihan na kita. Pero, just the fact that I could hear your voice, in full sounds, without seeing you or any of you, just makes me confuse as a freak. It was baffling me, okay? Kahit hindi mo ako kilala " Natatakot na sabi ko.

• I know. I understand that feeling. The confusion, uncertainty, and fear.

Biglang mahinang boses na sabi niya.

Natigilan naman ako bigla. Nagtatakang nagtanong ako sa kaniya pagkatapos mapansin ang dagliang pagiba ng tono ng boses niya.

" You sounded as if you are very much used of hearing voices in your head without anybody else around you." Pabirong tanong ko.

• Well, hearing voices in my head is already a part of my daily life, since I was a child.

Napahinga naman ako ng malalim saka nagtatakang ikinurap-kurap ang aking mga mata.

"You mean, you have been suffering by hearing voices since you were a child?" Kuryos na tanong ko.

• I have a mental illness called ' Schizophrenia '. Where, apparently, I was suffering delusions, disfigure perception or hallucinations, disorganized speaking behavior, loss of emotional responses and was often apathetic to everything. Pag-amin niya.

"That's..."

'What?'

Matagal akong natigilan sa aking kinauupuan habang sinusubukang intindihan ang lahat ng sinabi niya sa akin.

"That is sad." I said in sympathy while frowning hard. My eyes had a look of empathy as I imagine myself being in his position.

'So he suffers a mental disorder since he was a child?'

I heard schizophrenia is a pretty rough mental illness to deal with. I heard that most people diagnosed with it are often locked up in a mental institution because they are unlikely to fully understand the difference of reality and their thoughts. Often indulging themselves into believing their thoughts and ended up doing things that they did not meant to.

But other than those, I don't have any more idea what being schizophrenic means.

'So I can't really say anything,'

"I, I'm sorry to hear that..." I said in low voice.

I am not in a position to either feel guilty to this guy or feel pity to him. I do not know him nor his story. That's why it's better to be just feel sorry than to feel unnecessarily guilty. But still,

That does not mean I am not feeling down hearing that from him.

"It must have been very tough growing up, huh?" I said in a low understanding tone, trying my best not to accidentally offend him in any way.

I heard a light chuckle in my head as he spoke.

• No, it is fine. Although I was indeed diagnosed with such a disease, my case is not that severe. Other than hearing some unfamiliar voices in my head, I am not finding it hard to know the difference between reality and fiction. In fact, my life is pretty much normal, excluding the fact that I often talk to myself about trivial things, I guess it's because I get used of responding to the voices in my head that I was the only who could hear. Overall, it's fine, nothing to worry about.

Napangiti naman ako. "That's nice to hear." Kampanteng sagot ko.