[FBL] Friendship. To Benefits. To Love.

Chapter 29

When he wakes up he looks up to find Arm sitting on his bed glaring at him and Mek, who's sitting beside him on the bed and laughing.

"What?" He asks Arm.

Arm glares even more at him for even asking that question. "What did you do, New?! Think about it!" He snaps and New looks at Mek who laughs even harder at his brother's expression. "This isn't funny, you idiot!" Arm says.

New gets up fast and that's when it finally hits him that he falls back onto the bed. "Shit." He curses.

He remembers how Arm got sick and he threw up in the bushes outside. Mek took him inside after that and he got back to sleeping on his chair. Mek went back to that stupid girl New caught him with. And New?

New remembers foreign hands roaming every inch of his body as the nameless man presses him harder and harder into the concrete wall behind the club they were in. His kisses were rough and his lips tasted wrong. It was all so wrong, but it still happened. He shivers at the memory of awful sex that happened after that and leaving the guy right after, not even waiting for him to pull his pants back on.

He wants to punch himself really hard right now, but he has a feeling Arm might beat the hell out of both of them before he can even blink one more time.

"I cheated on Jenna and you cheated on Tay." Mek breaks the dreadful silence.

"Fuck." New groans.

Arm starts shouting then. "What were you thinking, you idiots?! Mek, as much as I hate that bitch of your girlfriend, she's still your girlfriend and you love her." He says to his brother. "She needs some respect. And New?" He turns to look at him and New's heart aches. Arm doesn't look angry, but disappointed.

That's even worse. New facepalms. "I thought you were finally getting somewhere with Tay. I hoped you were happy with him!" He says desperately. "And now you had to blow it all up."

"He doesn't have to know." Mek says pointedly.

Arm snorts. "He's covered in fucking love bites! A blind man would see it from a mile away."

New's eyes widen and he jumps from the bed and runs into the bathroom. He throws up everything he had to eat and drink in the past twenty four hours. Mek comes with him, running a soothing hand down his back while Arm stands in the doorway with a pained look in his eyes.

"It's okay, buddy." Mek says but New shakes his head.

Nothing is okay. He fucked up badly. Again. He goes home after breakfast. It was quiet and Mau kept giving them worried looks, but none of them spoke.

Mek went back to sleep and as he was about to leave, Arm grabbed his hand and followed him out to accompany him until they reached New's street.

They walked in silence for a while, never letting go of each other and breathing deeply until Arm spoke.

"I won't see you for a while now." New nodded. He won't be coming home for a month. "I need you to be safe, yeah?"

"Aren't you mad at me?" New asked sadly.

"Yes. I'm pissed." New looked at the ground and Arm gripped his hand tighter so he looked up again. "But I love you." He said pointedly. "And I know you weren't yourself last night and I wasn't either." He shook his head. "I wish I was sober enough to stop you when you went out with that guy."

"Arm. It's not your fault. You..." New starts desperately, but Arm stops him.

"Yes it is. We take care of each other. I couldn't take care of you." He says stubbornly and New wants to slap him.

"Shut up. You always take care of me, you fool." He hugs him. "You're the only thing keeping me sane right now, I swear. And that's what you've always done." Arm sniffs into his neck and New has to blink away the tears that are fretting to fall.

"You need to sort it out with Tay, yeah?" Arm says.

"I'll try, Arm. But he'll be pissed." He groans. "And I can't keep it a secret, I don't want to."

"I know."

"He'll kill me."

"I know." New pulls back to see Arm grinning in spite of himself and New grins back and pushes him.

"Fuck you." He says as Arm laughs. "Why are you laughing?"

"I laugh in face of danger." Arm shrugs.

"It's a question of life and death and you're making jokes." New snorts, but he's laughing too.

"We're never gonna change, yeah?"

"Yeah." New nods and Arm hugs him again.

"I gotta go now, 'kay? But you don't have to worry about Tay's reaction." New's brow furrows in confusion. "He's gonna be pissed, right? But I'd like to see him be mad at you and hate you for a long time when he's in love with you the way he is."

New's head snaps up at the 'he's in love with you'.

He's about to protest, but Arm kisses him on the cheek and storms down the street with a grin on his face.

New shakes his head fondly.

"Love you, bro." He shouts after him.

"Love you!" Arm shouts back.

New sighs as he enters his house. He needs to pack his stuff and say goodbye to his family. He has a train to Bangkok to get on and a boyfriend to disappoint.

*

Tay stares at his expression in the mirror. He's cheated before, but this was New. He was with New. After doing so many things to have him all to himself in the first place, he had to fuck it up and destroy what they had.

He doesn't know what's going to happen. New texted him this morning saying that he's coming over later on and that they had to talk. Tay has played a hundred scenarios in his head.

Maybe someone saw what happened with that girl. Maybe she knows New and told him herself. Maybe New wants to break up.

Maybe.

Maybe.

Maybe.

He has no idea what to do.

But he's sure as hell that this thing he has with New has been the only thing that's been keeping him away from all the shit he had in his life and he'll have to fight for it.

He touches the love bite on his neck and feels a slight pain. The bitch got him good. His thoughts are interrupted when he hears a soft knock on the door. He knows it's New, because he always knocks four times. Tay sighs and goes to open the door to his doom.