Tough Little Solider

The funeral

They had to bring Matt home and so the plane landed Chrissy walked over the coffin with Josh once they brought it down from the plane. Christina looked at her mother in law sitting with Brianna and half of her girlfriends looking shaken a bit as it brings her back to Josh when Matt was 7. Joshua is 7 months and it pains Kristina that Chrissy is the same age as herself when she lost Josh.

"Let get grandma."

Josh waddled himself over and held Kristina's hand. Kristina breathe as they wheeled over and she felt her heart broke all over again as she got close.

"No."

She was trembling as she wishes she could turn back time.

"Matthew, come back."

KJ, Arietta and Timena went over to console her.

"We're here breathe."

Kristina said.

"This is my biggest fear despite showing my support."

KJ broke down because he had a bond with Matt and he and Dad help alongside Josh's dad and siblings in raising him as Matt needed the father figure, but deep down as a sibling, he feels horrible for Kristina to go through so many losses: John, Matthew, Luke, Amanda, Joshua and Caitlynn.

"KJ, it ok. I have to say you will be an awesome Dad because of how well you raise my son."

KJ was touched by the complement.

The service was beautiful and everyone spoke of Matt and every one of his colleagues said.

"Matt is a born leader like his mom and dad hands down."

Chris said.

"On days where he get it done, we see Josh through and through. On days where's he is determined, we see the beautiful mother of his: Sarge Kristina Apa Martinez. 99% of the time, we see both of y'all personalities: when he worked his butt off when we were in Afghanistan. But most importantly he reminded us that he is a son, husband, Grandson, nephew and father first: when he really stressed out, he would say what would Mom do in this scenario or what would Uncle KJ, Grandpa or Grandma would say? Same with Josh's side of the family. And most importantly he say I want to be with my wife and son."

Kristina was heartbroken as this was the first time she was hearing this. She had no clue about the days that he is stress and wishes she guided him through whatever it was. Arietta, Timena and KJ could see his baby sister's guilt and it was going to beat her up for years or have some PTSD. He walked over and he could see Kristina's hands shaking.

"You ok?"

He whispered.

"Yeah just a tad."

She then said trying to fight her tears.

"Can Arietta, Tee and you sit with me? I just want ya'll."

KJ and the girls smiled and he moved Clara close to Kristina.

After Chrissy did her eulogy, Kristina went up trying to breathe and wanting her son at this very moment: he was her world.

"Matthew Luke 'KJ' Anthony Martinez was my heartbeat. From the moment I learned that I was expecting with him, I was thankful because when I had my work accident, I had asked the dr the question would I ever get pregnant? I was thinking about how severe the accident I had during work was and I thought it was not going to be possible, but he said anything is possible. I never forgot after Josh and I got married and one particular day during work I was not feeling well at all and I went to the nurse took a test with her help and I just felt nervous as I'm texting my mom.

MA, I'm sick what to do?

Before I send it, the results was read: Pregnant!

I bawled feeling relieved telling Annie to get Josh."

She said.

"When Matt came through he said good luck on your future endeavors and I was like thinking: CRAP then Luke acknowledge KJ to be an incredible uncle I was like ok i got to tell them."

she continue.

"The whole pregnancy experience was incredible and Josh and I were excited for our baby. We did not know the gender and once he was born, I was emotional because Josh let me name our son: Sure enough I honored the people I love so very much! I hope deep down and I take it with comfort that Matt is probably so excited to finally meet the two other namesake: Luke and Matthew. I hope it a joyful reunion between Josh and Matthew since it Father's Day today."

everyone chokes up.

"As a mother, I had vowed that I pray to be a wonderful mom to my son: as I always admired our mom in raising us, especially with KJ. Mom raised him to be kind, strong, respectful to others and to be humble. As Matt was growing up, I took that vow and I knew that I would be doing the same thing instilling my son the same thing. Thank you, mom I'm forever grateful!"

Tessa teared up, went up to Kristina and hugged her as she wasn't expecting her acknowledgment. As she walked down, Kristina added.

"Momma, there was a moment when raising Matt, I never expected that your voice would pop outta nowhere every dang time I called Matt and I never realize it till Matthew did that video for prom and all of the sudden the one video where I hear Keneti James! Your voice Matthew Luke my voice- side by side and all I'm thinking is #crapihavebecomemom that was where it truly stood out. Good job, son!"

Tessa and everyone cracked up. KJ so agreed with Kristina's hashtag: there were many moments where Kristina sounded a ton like mom.

Kristina said.

"When Josh passed away, I was scared but all in all I channeled Mom's energy in the best way as possible and raise him to be the kindest, loving man to Chrissy. When they got engaged and married, that when I knew that I did my job."

Kristina tear up.

"I miss him so much and I'm proud to be his mom."

Then they did the burial and the flag Chrissy got one and Kristina.