Is it love? or Is it Protective love? (ON HOLD UNDER RECONSTRUCTION)

Chapter 38

~38~

Isabel's POV

I woke up and looked around. There was a note on the bed. It was from Jordan.

'I know you are still mad but I am sorry Isabel. I will do anything to make it up to you. I know I did you wrong, but I'm sorry I will fix everything.
~ Jordan'

Well at least he knows I am still mad. He didn't think I would take him back so easy, ok maybe I did but he still has to work for my forgiveness again. He is going to have to show me he wants to have this. He is going to have to show me he won't hurt me again. He is going to have to work extra hard for this. I walked down stairs when I got there I heard laughing, the girls were on the floor playing with toys. I walked into the kitchen, Jordan was placing food on a plate.

"Hey sweetie, I was just about to come wake you up." Jordan walked over, he lowered his head down so he could kiss me on my lips; I moved my head so I wouldn't let him kiss me.

"Isabel I know you are still mad I'm sorry."

"Jordan sorry isn't going to change what you did, its going to take a lot to gain my respect back. Yes I am back with you but I can't do what we use to do."

Jordan sighed. "Is the wedding still on?"

"Yes it is."

"Good I'm happy then." I nodded my head. I grabbed the plate that Jordan had for me and went to where the twins were; I sat on the couch and started eating my food. Jordan sat next to me and wrapped his arm around me. For some reason I felt really uncomfortable, I felt like I was back at my dads house and I didn't want anyone to touch me. I moved away from Jordan.

"Isabel now you're running away from me?"

"Jordan this is as hard for me as it is for you. I am feeling like I'm back at my dads house. I-I just can't do it right now. It feels weird when you touch me Jordan. I love you I really do but I am starting to get uncomfortable." It looked like Jordan was about to cry. I was going to too, I love him I really do, but I just can't take it right now. Jordan nodded his head, Jordan turned around and walked away. He walked right out of the front door. I ran right behind him. I opened the door and yelled.

"You can go running back to her I don't care do whatever you want!" I slammed the door so I couldn't hear his reply. I had my back against the door, I slid down to the floor with tears running down my face. Everything was falling apart. I love him I really do, but I hate being hurt. I feel used, I feel dirty, I feel like it was the night my father raped me. I had to do something to take my mind off things. Just then Tony walked in.

"Tony can you please watch the girls while I got get something?"

"Yea." I walked out of the house, and down the street. I didn't know where I was going, I just kept walking. I saw saw a group of people smoking. I walked over.

"What is a pretty girl like you doing here?" Said a really attractive guy.

"I need to get my mind off things."

"Well you came to the right place. Welcome to Paradise."

"We got some shots, we got Cigs."

"I want both."

"Well first I have to show you how to do both of them. Give me your arm." I held out my arm. He pulled out a rubber band and wrapped it around my arm. He got the needle and stuck it in my skin. I felt it flow through my body. This feels really good.

"You like that don't you?" I nodded my head. "I just want that. Just give me that."

"Ok here." He handed me a bag. "This should last you for a while, but when you run out just come right back here. By the way my name is Troy beautiful." With that I walked away. This I hold in my hand just changed my life. I had a smile on my face for my walk home.