Darling [h.s]

19

Song For This Chapter:

Hesitate-Jonas Brothers

"Time, time only heals if we work through it now
And I promise to figure this out"

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Harry's POV:

The past week has been absolute hell, I've never felt so much stomach churning anxiety before.

Before you ask me if I genuinely regret what I said to Darlene, I will tell you.

Yes, of course I fucking do.

I lash out at people often, it's a habit and usually I don't care about the outcome. I don't care if they never speak to me again because most of the time I'd rather them not.

I'm a observant person, I'm literally a damn psychology major. It's basically what I do. So I pick up on things about people, and needless to say I usually know how to hit them right where it hurts.

That's why I said that shit to Darlene, I was pissed and honestly didn't even register what I was saying because like I said, this is a habit of mine and I'm pretty damn good at it.

But clearly I wasn't thinking straight, I was drunk and didn't snap out of my angry trance until Darlene was storming away.

It was almost like I didn't even register that who I was talking to was Darlene, Darlene fucking May. It was like I was on autopilot or some shit.

I fucked everything up, and at least I can recognize that.

But when I tell you Darlene saying she hated me replayed over and over again in my head everyday, I fucking mean that. It was like my mind was torturing me for fucking up so badly, yet my mind was the one who got me in this mess in the first place. The fuck is up with that?

She hit me right where it hurt as well, but I deserved it for the shit I said. After asking her constantly, like a damn broken record, if she hated me for the weeks leading up to the party she's denied it.

I just couldn't and still can't stand the idea of her hating me for some reason, I need her to like me. But when she revealed she does in fact hate me it felt like a punch in the face. One I definetly deserved, but it didn't make it hurt any damn less.

Regardless I knew I needed to try and apologize, but she never returned any of my calls or messages. Which is understandable, I pissed her off big time. I even contemplated showing up at her apartment, but I had a feeling that would piss her off more.

But it was driving me insane not knowing how she was doing. I couldn't fucking sleep.

Maya gave little to no information to me about how Darlene was. I understood though, she didn't want to get in the middle, but I was just hoping for anything to put my mind at ease.

When Darlene came over to pick up her clothes I swear finally seeing her in person had me as nervous as a middle school boy. Honestly pathetic, since when do I get nervous around woman?

She was angry, I could feel it radiating off her the second her eyes met mine.

I knew this was probably my only chance to try and explain myself, and what I intended to be a calm conversation turned into a explosive ass argument.