But dammit...

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It's been a couple of weeks since we had dinner with Andrew's family and things seem to be going well with Andrew and his dad. They've talked quite a bit and and even spent some more time together. Maggie has also been coming around a lot and her and I have really hit it off.

Andrew and I never did finish our conversation about love after that night which is okay with me. I have so many hormones and emotions running through me that I don't know that I can handle that talk right now. I know Andrew cares about me but part of me can't trust that it actually has anything to do with me. I honestly don't know if we would still be together if it wasn't for the baby. We can sort that all out later after the baby comes.

Today we're going to Oliver and Lily's for our baby shower. They graciously offered to have it so all we have to do is carry all the gifts across the street when it's over. Plus they have a pool and being eight months pregnant in August is killing me so I'm all about the pool.

I'm in the bedroom about to get dressed in a lightweight maxi dress when Andrew walks in.

"Hello, gorgeous." He comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my stomach as he kisses my neck.

I close my eyes and groan at the sensation. These hormones are something else. My body is so sensitive. My head falld back and rests against his chest. His bare chest. He just come from the shower and he smells like soap and whatever else it is that makes him distinctly Andrew.

He lowers one hand farther down and runs his finger along the edge of my silk thong as he continues to kiss along my exposed neck. My body reacts on it's own and pushes back against him. I feel him, hard and ready. I turn around and place one hand on the back of his neck to pull him towards me while the other hand finds purpose of its own and wraps around his hardness.

He groans into my mouth as he takes my face into both of his hands. He walks me backwards until I feel the edge of the bed behind me and then he's on top of me.

"We're going to be late." I say against his mouth.

His kisses his way down my neck to my breast.

"Do you want me to stop?"

I moan. "I will kill you."

He laughs as he takes my already hard nipple into his mouth. I moan again. He moves his way farther down my body and once he's between my legs I swear my eyes roll back in my head. Every inch of my body is electric but nowhere more so than where he is right now. It doesn't take long for me to feel the orgasm rip through me. I cry out as I grab his hair in my hands to hold him in place. I close my eyes as my body goes limp. I hear him laugh and crack open one eye.

"Do not laugh at me. Am I dead? I think I died there for a minute."

He laughs outright this time and then he leans over me and kisses me.

"Come on, beautiful, if we hurry we'll only be a few minutes late."

I pull him in for another kiss.

"But what about you?" I reach down and feel how hard he is. I start to stroke him and his eyes close. "Don't you want to fuck me?"

His eyes fly open. And I give him my sweetest smile, which he responds to with his most wicked.

"Always."

And then he kisses me as he slides himself into me. He pulls back and doesn't take his eyes off mine as he finds a slow but steady rhythm. My body quickly responds and within a matter of minutes I feel my orgasm building. I start to close my eyes buy Andrew moves the hair off my face and cups the back of my neck.

"Hey."

He waits until I look at him.

"Stay with me. I want to see you."

He thrusts a little harder and faster and I can see he's getting close to but he's trying to wait for me. And suddenly I fall over the edge. My orgasm hits me hard as I reach up to cup the side of his face. I stare into his amazing green eyes as I tighten around him.

"Andrew." God he really is gorgeous, and kind and funny and fucking fantastic in bed. "I love you."

As I say the words his orgasm takes hold of him. He keeps his eyes on mine and I see what looks like a little bit of shock but also tenderness.

Just then the doorbell rings and then we hear Noah yelling from the front of the house.

"Hey you guys planning on coming to your own party or what?"

Andrew jumps out of bed and rushes to close our bedroom door. Before he does he sticks his head out.

"We need a few more minutes. We'll be over soon."

I get out of bed, grab my underwear and dress on my way to the bathroom. I hear Noah on the other side of the door but I don't wait to hear what he has to say.

I lock the door because I need a minute. I just told Andrew I love him and I'm kind of freaking out. I didn't mean to say it, but dammit, a mind blowing orasm and a great man can make you do stupid things.

Part of me knows that I've been in love with him for awhile now but I still wasn't ready to admit it. Emotional intimacy and I don't get alone very well. Physical intimacy and I get along great, but emotional, not so much. How am I going to face Andrew now? What if he says it back? Or what if he doesn't? I honestly don't know which one is worse.

I freshen up and get dressed. Once I'm already I take a deep breath and walk out of the bathroom. Andrew's sitting on the edge of the bed dressed in his swin trunks, a button down shirt and sandals. He stands up when he sees me.

"Abby- "

"We have to get going. I just need to grab my bag with my swimsuit and our towels. Are you all ready?"

"Yes, but Abigail can we talk about what just happened?"

"There's nothing to talk about. Come on we can't keep people waiting any longer."

With that I grab my bag and head out the door. So I guess the way to deal with my big mouth is to take the cowards way out and pretend it never happened. Sounds good to me.

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