rare. |a.k.|

fifty seven|distractions

"He looks up, grinning like a devil," I yelled, mouth full cereal. I scrolled on my phone through Twitter, something that's unhealthy for my mental health but I have to get the news from somewhere.

One night I was laying in bed just sobbing until my body ached until I realized something: I should maybe try therapy.

Awsten said he recommended it to literally any human alive because, even if you don't think you need it, it's nice to vent to someone who knows how to deal with whatever you're talking about.

So I did. I went once a week for a month before I told Awsten and he was definitely happy and proud of me. He explained that he know's how it's scary and he would be there for me 100% which, I'm not gonna lie, made me cry. However, in realizing how I process emotions, things have definitely felt different. I used to go on my phone for social media and to get rid of boredom, now I go on it twice a day.

So now I mostly just clean, listen to music, play select video games, and sleep. Which has been amazing and it's made me feel a LOT better.

My phone started ringing, Geoff's name appearing on the screen.

"Hey," I cleared my throat.

"Hi, so, Awsten wanted me to tell you he probably won't call you today because we legitimately have a lot to do. And he couldn't call you right now because he's talking over plans with Lucas."

"Oh, that's totally fine?" I furrowed my eyebrows, "tell everyone I said hi."

He laughed and agreed before hanging up. I hope Awsten doesn't feel like he has to tell me what's going on at all times now. I don't want to be that type of girlfriend.

I went back to doing my thing. I looked at the calendar that read "January 31, 2020". Good God, seeing that made me feel old.

A couple days ago Awsten released a bunch of Waterparks demos that I have yet to listen to. I retweeted to make sure they're out, I might as well listen to them.

I immediately recognized Noise, he's leaked that one. He's probably leaked all of these at some point. Noise and Teenage Jealousy were incredible, Life is Puke just made me laugh. Read My Mind was beautiful, I sang along to Glitter Times and it sounded really nice with instruments other than a guitar. And although Glitter Times was a close second, I determined Last Heaven to be my favorite.

I don't know why. It was sad and it had part of a phone call with Ciara, but everything about it was just amazing. I just loved it.

Listening to it was fun but I had plans. I actually made a friend a couple weeks ago. There was a single mom living in the place below the apartment across from us who needed help moving out because the woman taking her place was early and I actually talked to the new girl, Melody.

Once I helped the mother move the last of her boxes, Melody and I talked about the city and where we came from. We immediately got along and now we're going to a movie, "The Boy II" because the first one was garbage.

I grabbed out some light blue jeans and a big Pulp Fiction t-shirt. I took a shower and got ready, tucking the shirt in and letting it a little loose, then running a belt through the loops on my jeans.

I did light makeup and grabbed my phone. Luckily we lived in the same building so I didn't have to use gas to pick her up. I grabbed a bag of Nilla Wafers and shoved them in my purse. I slid sunglasses up on my nose and locked the door once I left. Once I reached Melody's door, I knocked and she let me in.

"Hey girl! I'm almost ready."

"Do you have any snacks you wanna sneak in?" I asked and she laughed, popping her head out of the bathroom.

"I already love you. Yeah, I do, look through the fridge."

I opened the bottom crisper, seeing a baggie full of cookie dough bites. I giggled and pulled them out, seeing a bag of Chicken and a Biscuit crackers.

"In the fridge?" I muttered to myself and put them in my purse. I got this purse specifically for the movie theater because Awsten and I love to sneak in food. We once made whole sandwiches and ate them in the back row.

"Okay," she walked out in a white sun dress, latching a belt around her waist.

"Oh my God you look so good-"

"No, YOU look good!" She interrupted, making me laugh.

"Where did you get the jeans?"

"T-The thrift store?"

"Ugh, basic bitch," she smiled.

We got in my car and she plugged her phone in the AUX cord, turning on Manic by Halsey.

"Fuck this album is good," I said, turning up the volume.

We stopped for coffee on the way to the movie and I decided to get Awsten's order. I had it memorized from the countless times he'd been busy and I wanted to surprise him.

"That's an interesting order," Melody said while we waited to get our drinks.

"Yeah, I guess," I smiled.

Once we got our drinks, we got in the car and listened to music, then headed over to the theater. We got our tickets on IMDb so we were able to skip the atrociously long line and head right to the food stands.

We got drink and popcorn because we already had our snacks and headed to where our movie was.

The entire day was fun. I was actually distracted from my thoughts most of the day and it was amazing. I actually had fun. We went to the mall and were just fucking around.

Melody was actually really cool. After being in town for hours, the drive home was somehow more fun than the drive in. We just talked about the day, what we thought about certain things and looks we got from strangers.

That night, I was in a better mood than I had been in forever.

I had a good day.

Finally.

*𝕀𝕟𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕘𝕣𝕒𝕞*

chxrlie_hope

Liked by mel_o_dy and 1,017 others
chxrlie_hope "trying to forget anything as intriguing as this would be an exercise in futility"
View all 320 comments
mel_o_dy iconic
jesslyn.isnt.cool best fucking movie ever
underscoregeoff A classic

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(may 27, 2020)