The Nerd Who Rules The School

Chapter 37

I stood there anxiously, waiting for Asher to come back. All I wanted was to go home, I couldn't stand being here one more second. Right now, I was just barely keeping my monsters and demons away, I needed to leave before guilt once again eats me alive.

"Come on, let's bring you home." He appeared by the entrance at last, I hurried towards him and we walked out of the garden. In the distance, I could see the silhouettes of my parents disappearing around the corner.

Luckily, our way out didn't crossed with the place where the burial was happening so we didn't bumped into anyone. We didn't talk, but we were walking so closely together, my hand kept on brushing against his. Every time it did, I had to refrain myself from itching closer.

There was something new in the air between us, this new tension; it was not awkward nor uncomfortable, but a charged energy between us. I couldn't put words into it.

Throughout the way home, the weird tension just gradually increased. I could feel him stealing glances at me, darting his eyes back and forth from the road to me. I tried to ignore it, hoping it would just disappear.

When we arrived, the tension was still there, but exhaustion overcame me and there was nothing I'd love to do more than sleep. I hadn't had proper sleep since everything happened.

He came in with me and I couldn't take the tension anymore, "Do you know when will my parents come home?"

He shrugged, "I don't know, but probably very late because they will help out Drizel afterwards."

"Oh."

We stood in the living room, unsure of what to do, then as if my body knew, I yawned and at the same time my stomach rumbled.

He raised an eyebrow, and hid a small smile, "You want to eat something?"

"Sure." I just remembered I hadn't had anything since lunch and it had already been seven hours.

"Pizza?"

"Okay."

"The usual?"

"Yeah."

He ordered quickly on his phone and afterwards, we went back to staring at each other unsurely.

It had been such a long time since I had actually interact with a human being and I didn't know what to do. We sat down on the couch in the living room, both of us didn't want to go on our phones nor watch aimless TV.

Before, it would had been comfortable silence or it would be filled with easy conversations; but now the atmosphere felt different, the air between us was charged with something I couldn't quite put my finger onto.

Somehow, the crying and conversation in the garden helped me became more at eased with Maya. My heart felt slightly lighter, I knew I would go back to see her someday, which I could tell would be very soon, but just not right now, when I think I had finally came to terms with her death.

Then another thought suddenly came up, Asher's confession. I had completely forgotten about it for the past few weeks and it didn't even crossed my mind until now.

My heart skipped a beat at the thought, but at the same time it sank. If only Maya is here, she would know what to do.

I argued with my conscious, you can deal with this by yourself, you can't always rely on Maya, especially now that she is not here.

The first thing to figure out was, do I like him?

How can you tell that you like someone? Your heart beating faster? Thinking about them constantly? Noticing them more? That's what most books said anyways so it must be base on some truths right?

I mean of course I like him as a friend, I already considered him my best friend, even before Maya's death. Will I mind us becoming more than friends?

I couldn't even think of the answer, because I was scared of it, because deep down, I knew my heart would say no.

No, I don't mind being more than friends with Asher Hunt.

This thought, or truth, was almost as scary as realizing that Maya is dead.

Then I realized I had once again zoned out and Asher was staring at me the whole time. I pushed the discovery away, shoving it to the back of my mind. I didn't need any more thing to overthink about, to keep me up at night. I had enough demons and monsters to last me for a lifetime.

I met his eyes, and I was once again enraptured by it. It transferred me back to that time, when we had been in similar positions. Right now the atmosphere felt the same, the same tension between us.

He looked at me like he wanted to say something, but before he could, the doorbell rang. He got up quickly, but not quick enough to hide the relief yet disappointed look on his face.

Silence fell between us as we ate quietly. I tried not to notice how close he was, or how he was also sneaking glances at me.

Let's just say I do like him, then should I confessed? I mean he confessed so like do I like confess again? Or do I wait for him to bring it up again? What if he never does. What if I need to bring it up first. What if he assumes that I don't like him that way because I didn't speak up. What should I do Maya?

Gods Maya, I thought despairingly, I wish you were here.

I can't go down this path again. My conscious bravely thought, finally strong enough to push the unwelcoming thoughts away.

"-leave." Asher said as he cleaned the coffee table, he tightened the knot of the rubbish bag.

"Oh, yeah of course." I said, stiffing another yawn.

"Thank you, really, thank you so much." I said to him, walking him to the door.

"No problem, are you sure you will be alright being alone? Your parents are going to come back very late." He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Yeah, but really thank you." I said as sincerely as possible, and for the first time in a long time, I smiled; a small one, but nonetheless it was a smile.

He nodded uncertainly, smiling back at me too. He didn't leave immediately and we just stood there.

God was definitely feeling generous today because before things could get awkward, my phone buzzed and I quickly got it out to check the text message.

It was from my mom.

Dad and I will stay and help Drizel out, we will probably not come home night. Maybe you should ask Asher to stay with you? You shouldn't be alone right now. Call us if you need anything. We love you.

Yeah okay, I will be fine by myself, love you guys too.

No, ask Asher to stay.

He is a guy??! I really will be fine by myself.

We trust you and him enough. We don't want you to be alone, especially not right now. If you are really uncomfortable about it we can come back right now? Maybe I can come back first and dad can help Drizel out?

No no, Drizel need you guys more, fine I will ask Asher to stay.

Okay, love you.

Love you too.

Maybe God wasn't feeling generous after all. Maybe he just wanted to play with me and watch my life turned into a comedy for him to laugh at.