Out of the Shadows ✔️ [Completed] [Book One]

Chapter 62

I dart into the living room and pick up my phone. I let out a sigh in disappointment when I see Harriet's name on the screen.

My body literally feels like it has deflated as I open the message.

Hi Lizzie. I'm so sorry I've not been in touch. We're back in the UK for Christmas and I was wondering whether you were free to meet me for lunch today? Xxx

Why does everyone want me to do something today? I look around my flat and decide to say no. I don't want to be an adult today. I just want to stay here and pretend my life isn't one big shitstorm.

Hey. Hope you're both well. I can't today I'm afraid. Definitely another time though. L Xxx

I step back into the kitchen to finish making my cup of tea. As I sit back down and start flicking through boxsets, my phone vibrates again.

Come on Lizzie. I'm only available today. Please meet me for lunch, it's on me! Xxx

What it is with the pressure today, first Caroline and now Harriet.

I'm not feeling great. So, I'll catch up with you soon. L xxx

The phone vibrates while it is still in my hand.

I'm not taking no for an answer. It'd be lovely to catch up. I've booked a table. Meet me at St. John's at 1pm. Or I can pick you up if you'd rather? Xxx

I put my head in my hands while I decide what to do. A second message comes through a minute later.

Even if it's just an hour, it'd be so nice to see you. Xxx

At this rate she is going to turn up here anyway and drag me out kicking and screaming. I guess it would be nice to see her again. I give up and say yes.

OK, OK. I'll meet you there at 1pm. L xxx

Wonderful. Don't be late. Xxx

So, it looks like I'm not vegging out in front of the TV today then. I check my watch and it's already 11.15am. I better get ready.

Why did it have to be there? I think with sadness as I step into the shower. I stand under the flow of water that is almost too hot to bare and remember the last time I was at St. John's. I refuse to cry anymore. I make a promise not to cry in front of Harriet and to snap out of this personal pity party.

Although St. John's is pretentious, I intentionally shy away from my dresses. Instead, I choose my tight fitted dark jeans, a navy blouse and cream blazer. I pair it up with my cream high court shoes and curl my hair. I also take my time with my make up because I don't want to look like crap when I know Harriet will be immaculate.

A feeling of trepidation washes over me and I'm not sure why. Harriet will definitely have an opinion about what happened and she is not one to mince her words. Also, I think Oscar will know more about what happened to end my own relationship than I do. Which means Harriet probably knows more than me too. I groan at the thought of what she is going to say.

I check my reflection and add some bright red lipstick. I grab my coat and head out the door into the bitter cold, before I change my mind.

As I approach the hotel, I look up at the building with St. John's perched on the top floor. The memories of the last time I was here threaten to overwhelm me and I freeze on the pavement outside. I'm literally unable to move. 

"Come on Lizzie." I say to myself as I force one foot to move in front of the other. "You've been through worse. You can do this." I slowly make my way into the lobby as a young couple look at me strangely for talking to myself. I can't help but cut my eyes at them. They are clearly on a romantic date. I press the lift call button with a little more force than is necessary.