The Older We Get

Chapter 36

               "I don't want to do this anymore." Josh comes outright. "We're friends. No matter what Sage. You're a homie. I don't like dodging you in a hallway or preparing myself for the possibility of seeing you everyday, wondering if transferring would be better. It's too hard. Harder than being around you so, I'd like to just, make up, be friends again."

"Joshua, we never stopped being friends. You have every reason to feel the way you do, I'm so sorry for fvck," I look away. "Everything."

"I can't hate you Sage. I can't even dislike you. I can't even stay away from you. It's like ripping off a band-aid. The sooner the better and the pain will go faster." My ex boyfriend nods his head before I smile and slowly side-glance at his statement.

"Did you just call me band-aid?" I half smirk out of confusion.

"Sorta. You owe me that. You owe me alot." He points when I shrug and agree with him.

I owe this guy so much. He's a trooper and really admirable. It makes sense that we dated. Our characters are almost exactly alike in some ways. There was just the spark lacking.

The one that punk in the house constantly pushes on me every second I'm with him.

"Well then a hug on the house? Or is that..." I hesitate and wait for him to reject or accept my offer when he gestures me to stand up and wrap his somewhat bulked arms around my back, his old cologne that I remember so strange now since I've just been exposed to Chandler's for a while lately.

It's odd how their scents differ.

Josh has a stronger more impactful scent that takes some getting used to. Nothing sweet about it, no twist or mystery. It's up front and overwhelming but refreshing.

Chandler always chooses something that smells like if it were a shape, it'd always be dancing or trickling, even fluttering, like a fallen petal when it lingers just before creating a ripple on the water. How it slowly introduces itself to you, finding a way to ribbon around and mystify, lulling you with sensitivity.

Maybe it's their characters influencing my thinking about it.

"You want to get some pizza? They have some in the house." Josh lets me go when I linger forward and think about seeing my boyfriend.

I'd like to talk with him and maybe settle him down if he's still acting a little batty.

"Sure." I leave my plate behind to head on inside, the house a little hot but it's not too bad given outside is a bit chilly.

I'm not so sure having a party at this time of year in this fashion was such a good idea. Do people normally run around close to winter time in bikini's? Jeez, why'd I ever want to get to know these drones? I'm sure at least some of them are genuine but-

"Whooo!!!" A girl right beside me hears the song pop up when she jumps up and screams in my ear, her eyes shut so of course she didn't see me.

Another reason to hate parties.

"Enthusiastic huh?" Josh raises a brow in the midst of legit, a crowded living room adjoining the kitchen not too far from us, my eyes going over the people leading up to a bunch of stairs where I halt my movements and see Chan facing Katelyn, both of them talking before they go upstairs...together.