Chapter 16 - Vanessa's past

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VANESSA'S POV.:

I woke up and turned over and saw Dan's face only inches from mines. I couldn't help but smile. He was mines. This had always been my dream. If this was wrong, I didn't wanna be right. Of coarse old sappy words to heal the heart. But I think I loved him. I don't think I ever want this to end. This moment. Now. Is perfect. He's mines. Most importantly, I'm his!

This couldn't be real. If I was still in Boston some one wake me up before this dream goes too deep. 

I closed my eyes as tigh as I could I started to cry. I haven't been this emotional since. Well Josh. I try not to think about him much. It brings back too much painful memorires. And to just know he might be out there. In London.

In Manchester.

Oh god! I started burtsing in tears. I turned over to hide from Dan, just in case he woke up. He didn't need to know. Not about Josh. Not yet at least.

But he has a right to know. It's my past. Not the best but it is. I'm only 21 and my life is already a train wreck. Or as some would refer to. A disaster waiting to happen.

The flash back occurded in my head.

-flashback-

"Why don't you just do what I tell you to?!" He yelled loudly throwing his hands in the air.

I flinched.

"You always do this. You can never listen. Doing this will never hurt you."

"Maybe not now, but you will!" I spat out at him with tears in my eyes.

"You know what.-" His drunken babble didn't make sense but I knew what he was gonna say.

"Get in the room and don't come out!" He hissed.

"Why should I you're only going to hurt me! I hate you! I'm leaving!" I pushed my way past him.

He grabbed my arm violently pulling me to face him. "Don't ever talk to me like that. You need to know your place woman." He kissed me violently. I refused. I pulled back. 

Only at the age of 19 I was in a abusive relationship. I though. 

"Let go of me you drunk!" I screamed.

He pulled his hand back and slapped me. I screamed with pain. "You shouldn't scream, you'll wake  her. Now you wouldn't wanna do that would you?" 

I was 19 turning 20 real soon. My mom went to Florida for an important operation. My dad left us when I was nearly 2. I didn't remember much of him. He seemed much like Josh from stories of family. The good parts of him at least. At the same time. He was practically the same guy. He was a alcoholic and he did drugs. He never abused my mom, but apparently Josh did. To me. 

I looked into his eyes with tears. "What happened to you? What happened to that incrediably sweet and shy guy I fell for? Where's her." I started sobbing softly. I slid down the wall and kept crying clutching my knees to my chest. "Where's that man? The man I loved. The man who I cared about? Where did he go. Did he leave when you went to the bar?! Huh?" I stood up again. I started screaming at the top of my lungs. "Did he get on a plane when you bought those drugs? Huh!! Cause if he did get me a ticket for the flight. I need to see him."

He looked me dead center into my eyes, blurred with tears.

"He was never there, and he's not coming." He pushed me back down onto the floor.

He started vigorusously trying to take off my clothes.

"Stop! Don't touch me." I kicked and screamed. "Let me go."

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