Silk and Leather

Part 23: Shattered like glass.

It's been just over a month now since the graduation party, each time I recall that night in particular I end up in a chuckle for the morning after Lysa's Mum and Aunt found the pair of us in her bed.

No surprise there was a form of argument and style of routine for your parent to discover you'd just done the deed, although it was the third time for me and Lysa it was the first time of it being mentioned to her family. Speaking of my Grandparents just found the whole thing amusing stating that younglings are always free spirits, didn't understand it fully but whatever.

Round this time I was due for a therapy check-up, the Doctor said a meeting after six months was suiting for me. Fact was I didn't know if I needed more then that or not, felt weird being somewhere without Lysa at my side that it got me thinking was I really depending on her too much?

God those toxic thoughts again, first feeling like an anchor to her life-goal, now the notion I was just using her to feel more human inside, man this sucks. Lying atop a brown leather couch you'd expect from a Therapist, I went over the past events. Everything from the positive, negative and middle grounds.

"I see, sounds like you've had quite the experience since our last meet. I would like to question you about the incident involving a police officer stopping by, I got his report shortly after but due to back logs of clients it slipped under the radar." The Therapist who basic run-down was Korean, mid to late Forties, wore glasses and was way too professional for his pay-grade.

But yeah how could I forget what I did at Max's mansion during one of his wild parties, again I was thankful for not killing him that evening, even if the cops listed it off as a medical related outburst requiring treatment immediately. Fact was that didn't really happen and I personally felt I needed jail time to pay my dues.

"That night...." I started my response to him drifting gaze downward at my overlapped hands resting on my stomach, "Everything was just a blur, nothing but... feeling like it was required to do what I did, even though I regretted it at the same time. I couldn't stop myself yet I had full control, I don't know how to put it." That was the full explanation. He simply nodded jotting down notes on his tablet, oddly he had the old fashioned clipboard when I first arrived but times always change.

"Do you feel the loss of your family was a factor in this course of action? For the report states you where there to rescue someone you held close feelings towards." Being the next question on his list, my first thought was 'No shit Sherlock' but I instead nodded in silent exhaling a heavy breath through my nose.

Whenever I hear loss and family in the same sentence I get quite emotional, I'm emotional in general yet it amps that scale up when stated. "Are you still taking the medication proscribed? Heard you've experienced some side-effects?" Next few questions being answered like the previous with a nod. I'd much rather have a war-veteran tell me how to deal with post-traumatic stress then a guy out of a university, for those guys see stuff like I experienced albeit worse and on a daily basis.

After a rather long session, I finally walked out the building before my phone buzzed out stating a message. Person behind said message was my girlfriend which read "Troy's holding a party tonight, wanna go? No harm if we don't though." Ugh another party? I really didn't like them but at the same time it was only with my friends, plus Maggie's new boyfriend and Troy's girlfriend. So it's just a triple couple party right?

Fuck it. Why not for the shits and gigs, replying to Lysa's message which was met with the smiling emoticon. I had nothing else to do aside from a little work given to me by someone Grandpa knew, he was hopeless with computers so I was entrusted with this task being done. As such as way of it I got onto it before my memory forgets it's importance.