The Substitute Teacher

Part 128 ~ Breaking The Ice

~ Jaylah's point of view ~ 

I lied to dad . . well . . kinda . .

Jenna and I aren't really going to the movies tonight . . we planned this evening for 2 days. Mom is going to grandma and grandpa's this evening . . and dad is home . . I know he is, I called earlier and made sure that he is. Jenna is gonna help me . . . and her cousin Cara . . this plan might seem crazy but I think it's gonna work . . . it HAS to work. 

Cara is gonna go over to our house  . . . she's gonna tell dad that her car broke down and that she needs help. . dad doesn't know that Cara is Jenna's cousin . . . to him, she's just gonna be a stranger from the street needing help with her car . . . . and when mom gets home, she'll see dad with Cara and . . . well . . I just hope that mom gets jealous . . . if she still loves dad, she will. 

Cara is a gorgeous 26 year old . . . if this doesn't get mom jealous then I don't know what will. Cara just left Jenna's house . . . she's on her way now . . . I'm so nervous . . . ugh . . . she's gonna keep me and Jenna updated through text messaging . . I just hope mom gets home in time . . . .


~ Jaden's point of view ~ 

The flowers are in the trash and so is my heart . . . I didn't know she was involved with someone . . . how could she do this? . . I know we're not a couple but still! . . we had sex . . I spent the night there . . we had a wonderful night together . . . . . this breaks my heart  . . . I could just cry . . . . what hurts me the most was how she greeted me at the door . . . like I was just one of her students wanting to say hello. Like . . what?! . . . she can't be serious . . .  I'm in love with her and that's what she does to me? . . . 

I'm walking down the street looking like a fool . . and feeling like one too. How stupid of me to think that Julianna and I could ever be . . . but I want her . . . I never felt my heart beating faster for a girl before. . . never in my life . . . she is the first one I truly and genuinely have feelings for . . . . and this is what I get?

Thanks . . . 

I look to my right . . . a car just stopped on the side of the road. I ignore it and keep walking . . suddenly I hear Julianna's voice calling my name . . . I look back and see her walking towards me . . . 

"Jaden? . . . Jaden wait . . . hold on . . why didn't you give me the flowers?" 

"I didn't think you really wanted them . . ."

"Please let me talk to you for a second . . ."

"What do you wanna tell me? . . that you have a boyfriend? . . that you're engaged? . . that you're married? . . . I don't think I wanna hear that . . . I better just keep walking and go back home . . . good night"

"Jaden . . . . please . . . let me talk to you . . ."

I stop walking. . . she walks up to me and gently pinches my cheek.

"I feel guilty for what happened between us . . . I'm sorry I let it happen . . I should've stopped you . . . I should've known this would happen . . . I'm sorry, Jaden. . .I'm really, really sorry"

"Yea . . . me too . . . good night . . . ."

"Jaden . . . I mean it . . I'm sorry . . ."

"You don't have to be sorry . . I have to be . . . sorry for myself . . . I should've known we could never get together . . . I should've never fallen in love with you in the first place . . . I guess this is what I get . . . but don't worry . . our secret will stay our secret . . . I just hope you . . . I just . . I just hope you never forget the night we had together . . . because I know I never will . . ."

Is that tear rolling down my cheek? . . great . . I didn't mean to cry . . now I feel even worse than before . . . the man called her Honey . . . she must be invovled with that guy . . . maybe he's not her husband but someone who gets to call her honey . . . I wanna be the one to call her honey . . . . . 

"Are you crying? . . . ."

"No . . . that's a raindrop . . ."

"It isn't raining, Jaden . . ."

"In my world it is . . ." 

I turn around and keep walking down the street . . . suddenly I feel her holding my arm, turning me around. What does she want from me? . . I don't get it . . why does she even care how I feel? . . .

"Jaden . . . if you were only 18 . . ."

"Then what? . . what would be the difference if I was?"

"You know what the difference would be, Jaden . . . ."

"No I don't . . . . we had sex . . . I loved it . . and I know you loved it too! I fell in love with you, Julianna . . and now I feel so stupid . . I wanna love you now . . . not in two years . . ."

"Jaden . . . I feel so bad . . I really do . . . I should've never let this happen between us . . I feel horrible . . how can I make you feel better? . . please . . what can I do??"

"I want you to fall for me . . . ."

"I can't . . . ."

". . . and why not??"

"Because . . . because I'm already falling for you . . . and it's WRONG"

"Yea right . . . in case you don't know, this is not making me feel any better . . lying to me just to shut me up? . . I can feel when someone's in love with me and I know you are not . . . I know the age difference is the problem here and I understand . . but the one thing I just don't understand is how you could let me have sex with you . . . THAT I don't understand . . . . . but I get it now. . . you don't have to explain yourself . . . I understand . . . just forget about it"

"I'm not lying to you Jaden . . . what I just told you is the truth . . . but I can't live this truth because it's wrong . . WE are wrong . . you have no idea in what kind of trouble I'm getting myself into . . . I already did get myself in major trouble by sleeping with you . . . I couldn't get myself deeper into this mess . . . I'm risking my job here . . I could get arrested . . . aren't you aware of that?? don't you know that, Jaden?!"

"Yes I do . . . but I promised to keep my mouth shut! . . I PROMISED! and I WILL . . . you don't have to worry about any of that! . . . I'm in love with you, Julianna . . . I wouldn't want you to get in trouble . . . that's the last thing I want . . . "

"Then you understand why we can't be together. . . right?"

"Yes . . but I don't want to understand it . . . ."

"You don't have to understand it . . . . I just want you to know that I'm sorry for everything . . . I hope you can forgive me . . ."

"Well . . . I love you . . . how can I not forgive you?"

"Jaden you don't love me . . ."

"Yes . . I do . . . . . but the guy you're with loves you more, I get it"

"Jaden . . the guy who answered the door wasn't my boyfriend . . we used to date and he still likes me but I don't feel the same way about him. . . I don't know why he called me honey, I was surprised myself . . . he came over to talk, that's the honest truth . . . please don't be mad at me . . I would hate that"

"There's nothing going on between you two?"

"No, sweetie"

"Why do you call me sweetie?"

"Because you are . . . you are my sweetie . . ."

"I like that name . . . ."

"Listen, Jaden . . . when you're 18 . . we can talk about a relationship"

"I don't wanna wait two years. . . I'm in love with you now!! . . why can't I just have you now? . . I'm 16 but I'm very mature for my age! . . you said it yourself! . . and I saw the look on your face when I gave it to you . . you were happy . . you were satisfied . . . what more do you need in a relationship? . . I may not have my own house and I don't have any money but I'm in love with you! . . . shouldn't that be enough?"

"Jaden . . if I weren't your substitute teacher, all this would be a lot easier . . ."

"Please be honest with me now . . . do you really like me?"

"Of course I like you . . . you're a sweetheart . . any girl would be lucky to have you"

"How much do you like me on a scale of 1 to 10?"

"You really wanna know that?"

"Yes . . ."

She grabs my face and kisses me on my forehead.

"You're the sweetest boy I know"

"Boy? . . I'm a man . ."

"Yes you are . . . I'm sorry"

"Can I have a kiss on the mouth?"

"Jaden . . . ."

"That would make me feel a lot better . . you know . . ."


~ Ariana's point of view ~ 

It felt great talking to my mom about this whole thing . . . I've been in this deep depression that I feel like I can't get out of . . . something's missing in my life . . . in my heart . . I just don't feel complete anymore . . I wish I could just brush it all off and be my old self again but it's not so easy . . . being deeply depressed like this is horrible . . . . I've never felt like this in my whole life . . . I need to see a therapist . . definitely.

I'm having bad anxiety . . I feel scared when I'm out alone . . . I have the worst nightmares . . . I don't feel safe in my own home . . . I don't feel good about myself . . I hate the way I look . . . I don't feel sexual at all . . . I just hate everything . . . . . the kids are the only positive light in my life . . . . and Michael . . . I just wish I could show him what he means to me . . . but those feelings are blocked. As much as I try, I can't get myself to hug him or kiss him . . . . my feelings are turned off completely . . they're somewhere floating around in my body. . . they're everywhere . . . just not where they should be. . . in my heart.

I'm tired again . . just like I am all day, everyday . . tired and exhausted from all the horrible feelings and emotions. . . going through life feeling so down really sucks out all your energy . . what I need is comfort and love . . . I wish I could just open up and let Michael give me the love I need . . . but I just can't . . . . 

I park the car and get out . . . Michael is out here talking to a woman I've never seen before. Who is she? and why is she here? I ignore them and walk inside . . . A moment later Michael comes in . . with her . . 

What is she doing in here? . . .

"Ariana . . . this is Cara . . her car broke down and now we need to find a car shop to get it fixed. . they need to pick it up here . . something is seriously wrong with the car, we can't get it to start. . . . .are you ok? . . how are you feeling?"

The woman keeps looking at her phone . . she's really beautiful . . . . 

"I'm alright . . . . I'm going to bed . . ."

"Ok . . . I'll be up later"

I give them a forced smile and walk up to the staircase. For some reason I can't walk upstairs . . not yet . . something inside of me wants me to stay down here for a little while . . . I'm just gonna make myself a cup of coffee and read a magazine . . . until she's leaves . . . 

_____________________
~ Jaylah's point of view ~ 
(TEXT MESSAGE CONVERSATION WITH CARA)

"How is everything going? . . is my mom home?"

"Yea. . she just came!"

"Flirt with my dad . . . and make sure my mom sees it!"

"I feel so uncomfortable, Jaylah . . ."

"Please do it!! . . tell him you like his hair . . just make sure my mom can hear you say it! dad loves when someone compliments his hair . . . and my mom knows that . ."

"Alright . . I'll text you in a minute!"

"Thank you so much, Cara!"
_____________________


~ Ariana's point of view ~ 

Why does this woman keep complimenting Michael's hair? . . and why does she keep looking at her phone all the time? . . 

"I really like your hair, Michael . . . I love your curls!"

"Thanks!"

"Can I touch it?"

"Ummm . . . yea . . sure . . why not?"

What the hell? . . what is this woman doing running her fingers through Michael's hair? . . isn't she supposed to be worried about her car? . . . I get up with my coffee mug and walk up to them. 

"So . . . how's the car doing?"

"I'm trying to call the car shop but I can't get through . . they must be busy" Michael says.

The woman looks at her phone.

"Ummm . . . Michael . . . what do you do for a living?"

"I'm a teacher"

She types something on her phone again . . . what the hell is she typing?

"A teacher? . . . wow . . . that's great . . . you must be really smart . . ."

She's got to be kidding me!!!! what a cheap way to hit on my husband! 

"Smart? . . hehe . . I guess you have to be when you're a teacher"

She starts laughing . . . "You're totally right" . . . *laughs*

This woman is totally flirting with himl! . . in my own home! . . with me sitting right next to them! . . how dare she? . . did her car really break down or is she just hot for my husband?? . . .

". . . Umm . . Michael?"

"Yes?"

"Can I see you upstairs for a minute?. . ."



~ to be continued ~