Well this chapter is longer :) I like it more towards the end, and I can't wait to write the next chapter.
Chapter 18
Putting the books back in place, I decided to leave the room. I needed to talk to Nadya or maybe even Bax. The box could wait, it would still be there when I came back. Bounding down to the kitchen I found Nadya mixing around some food.
"Mmm, that smells delicious, what is it?"
"Oh I'm just preparing some Salmon today."
"Sounds good," I smiled, "Fish is just about the only sea food I eat."
"Baxter is the same way," Nadya laughed, "Damon will eat just about anything."
I sat idly on a stool as I began to have a war in my head.
Should I just blurt it out and ask her?
No, that'd be stupid. It would make her suspicious.
Well either way if I ask her she'll be suspicious.
Well then how do I ask her? She's my safest option. I'm not asking either of the guys yet.
Maybe I could ask her nonchalantly.
"You're being awfully quiet. What are you thinking about?" Nadya asked.
Perfect set up! "Not much, it's just I was in the library earlier and I found this note in one of the books from a girl."
"Hm, is that so?" Nadya replied, not bothering to turn around.
"Yeah, I think her name was...um...it started with a 'C'. Chloe, I think."
Nadya's back visibly stiffened. The motion was so quick that I got scared she was possessed or something. She dropped her spool and whipped around.
"Do you know who she is?" I asked softly.
"Alaure, you should really be careful when you're snooping around. You're treading into dark waters and you need to get out quickly."
My eyebrows shot up in surprise. Nadya had never warned me off from snooping before. What was so important about this girl that she had to be kept a secret?
"I promise I wasn't snooping when I found the note. I was just looking for a good book."
Nadya sighed and walked over to me. "Alaure, a lot of time I act as if everything in this house is fine and dandy, but it's not. This is a dangerous place. If it weren't for what you knew, you wouldn't still be here. Your life would be completely different, changed for the worse."
She shuddered, closed her eyes and looked away. "You HAVE to be more cautious. I fear that soon enough you'll upset Damon to the point he will no longer care about what you know and you'll be sent off into a new and horrendous life."
"What are you—"
"I can't tell you," she said regretfully, "just, please be careful. I know I can't stop you. You have a strong, stubborn, and determined spirit. They're all admirable qualities until you get stuck in a situation such as this."
I sighed, shoulders slinking down, "I just wish I knew what I supposedly know. I sound completely insane."
She laughed a little. "Can you at least tell me a few things about her?"
She sighed again and shook her head in a scolding manner. "What do you want to know?"
"Was she Damon's girlfriend or Bax's, or not even a girlfriend?"
"Although it's a little more complicated, she was Damon's girlfriend."
"Was? What happened to her? Why isn't she here? Will she ever come back here?"
"No, she won't ever be able to come back here. I can't tell you what happened," she said, looking down at her lap. She stood up and went back to cooking without another word. I nodded my head, knowing she wouldn't be able to see it.
So she was once Damon's girlfriend, but then what about her pictures with Bax? Was she his sister or something? Wait, that didn't make any sense because then she would be Damon's cousin too? Maybe they were good friends too? Did she cheat on Damon with Bax? But why would she? She seemed like she was really in love with him. No. There had to be something more. I had a feeling that their relationship wasn't as simple as I was making it out to be. She was important though. That much I was sure of.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"Let's go," Damon said, walking into the library as looked up from my book.
"Where?" I asked
"Snowboarding."
"Well that was kind of random."
"I told you earlier this week I'd take you, didn't I?"
"Yeah, but it just seems so spontaneous."
"Did you expect me to give you a day's warning or something?"
"Uh, yeah, kind of. Plus, most people usually start by asking "Are you busy?" or "Hey, you want to do something?""
"You're stuck in a house in Alaska, what could you possibly be busy with?"
"Reading, or maybe helping Nadya in the kitchen."
"Well the only reason important enough would be if you were making those brownie cookies again or those cinnamon pretzles."
I rolled my eyes. Boys and their stomachs.
I closed the book that I hadn't even been paying attention to and set it down on the table next to me.
"Whatever, let's go."
"Alrighty then, follow me," he said excitedly. I couldn't help but notice the enthusiastic way he hurriedly bounded down the stairs. I could barely keep up with him. Once on the bottom floor, he took me into a short hallway with more stairs. As we reached the bottom, the first thing I noticed was the second pool Baxter had been talking about. It was a three lane lap pool but it was closed off by glass windows. Perpendicular and over the pool was a walkway with glass on both sides that allowed someone to look at anyone swimming below. We walked over it and passed a large gym on the left side. The hallway opened up, revealing a movie room, a second billiards table, and a mini bar in the corner.
We turned into a shoe room with countless little cubbies with shoes in them
"Looks like someone has a shoe fetish," I said, but he didn't hear me as he stalked over to the end of lines of cubbies to some larger spaces. Neatly lined up were several snowboards in different sizes and colors. Above it were rows of old and new snowboarding shoes.
"Whoa. Where'd you get all this gear from?"
"Mostly my old stuff, but you just naturally end up with this much when you love a sport as much as I love snowboarding."
"Or when you're filthy rich," I muttered.
"What?"
"Nothing," I smiled. He handed me some thermals and black and white striped snow pants, and I quickly changed outside of the room in a corner.
"You said your shoe size was eight and a half, right?" he asked as I walked back in.
"Yeah." He hesitated for a moment before grabbing a pair of raspberry colored ones for me and electric blue and black boots for himself. I examined the boots he handed me, noting that they were a girl's boots. I'd be willing to take a bet that they were probably once Chloe's. Why would someone leave so much of their stuff behind in house they would never return to?
"What do you ride?"
"Twin board, preferably on the small side with a 9 degrees stance on each foot."
As he set the bindings on a board I checked out the boot Damon handed me. I felt a little awkward wearing the shoes of a girl he probably once loved. I felt like I was wearing a dead woman's clothes. Nevertheless, I shoved them on and laced them up.
"All good?" Damon asked, handing me my board and a grey and purple snow jacket. I nodded, wiggling my toes around in Chloe's shoes as Damon got ready. Maybe I was overreacting. These could have been Nadya's shoes. Then again, she didn't really seem like the type to snowboard. I should just man up and ask him. I could face the consequences right? It's not like I was purposely looking for stuff about this girl. It was all an accident.
"Let's go," he grinned.
I half-heartedly smiled at him, nodded, and followed him out of the room. That's when I realized that this would finally be my first time out of the house in weeks. A slow grin crept across my lips, spreading to my eyes like a disease.
"Well that's kind of a creepy grin."
"Where are we going?"
"Up to the top of the mountain where I usually run rounds. It's the clearest part of the mountain, but it's still unpaved, backcountry."
"But I've never been much of a backcountry—ooh," I ogled as we stepped into the garage.
"What? Like my cars?"
I just stared at them, wide-eyed in amazement. "What's the point of even having these cars? It's not like you can speed around in them up here?" I scorned, breaking out of my gaze.
"When it gets warmer I can. Actually, in the winter I can too. You just have to be careful, or, you know, skilled, like me," he replied haughtily, pretending to dust off his shoulder.
"What're we taking?"
"The pick-up truck with the chained tires." I raised my eyebrows at it. That's some heavy duty stuff. It must be pretty rough roads where we're going.
"But I don't get it. How are we supposed to get back up once we come down?"
"You've never done this before have you? Snowmobiles of course."
"Ohh," I replied nervously.
"Hey, don't worry, I'll help you out," he smiled, "but you better not drag me down."
He unlocked the doors, put our stuff in, and lifted the two snowmobiles in. I wasn't really sure how this day was going to run, anxiety and excitement was coursing through my veins. Hopefully I didn't make a fool out of myself although it was kind of inevitable.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The ride there was silent and long, but I wasn't complaining. The scenery was absolutely gorgeous although most people would argue that it all looked the same. The drive, though, was making me sleepy, sitting in one place tended to have that effect on me. My jaw was starting to hurt from all the times I had yawned, and I'm pretty sure I dozed off for a few minutes at certain points in the ride. It wasn't until we slowed down that I finally stirred in my seat.
"Are we there yet?"
"Yepp," he replied, pulling up to a small cabin-like house.
"What is that?"
"Just what it looks like, a cabin. It's for warming up, eating, and if there's ever a need to get to safety, nothing fancy."
"So how are we doing this?" I asked as we parked and got out of the car.
"We're taking this snowmobile up together."
"Then what was the point of bringing two?"
"So we can bring the first one down."
"Are you sure it's safe?"
"As long as I'm driving, yeah. I have a lot of experience maneuvering around here, but you're going to have to drive down soon enough once we get both to the top."
"I'm going to fall over and die, you know."
"Quit being so dramatic, you'll be fine."
"Easy for you to say," I muttered, walking into the cabin. Quickly we started up a fire to keep the cabin warm and set all of our extra things down. Before I knew it, we were back out in the snow, riding bumpily up the slope of the mountain. My arms were wrapped tightly around Damon's waist, eyes shut, fingers digging into his side, and getting tighter with every bump and ditch. It must have been 30 minutes at top speed before we finally reached the top. I didn't hesitate to jump off the snowmobile, knees and hands shaking, but not from the icy temperatures.
"That was so god awful!"
"Wimp."
"We could have fallen off and never be found again!"
"But we're okay, so quit freaking out and strap in before I decide to leave you up here all alone."
Deciding to listen I laid down my board and strapped in. Moths were swarming in my stomach as I looked down the steep slope I could barely believe we came up.
"I'm not so sure about this anymore Damon. I've never boarded on unpaved paths."
"Well there's only two ways down: the snowmobile or your board. Choose wisely," he grinned.
I gulped and looked between the board and snowmobile. "Uh, okay, I'll board, but you better help me down."
"I told you I would didn't I. Now you go down first so I can follow behind you."
"What?! No no no! I'd much rather just follow whatever path you make yourself."
"That could be even more dangerous if I uncover some roots or ice, or if you get lost behind me and I don't notice."
I faltered for a moment, but finally positioned myself over the drop. "Alright, here goes nothing."
Tipping the nose of my board forward, I inched down the top of the mountain before building speed. Gradually, my fears were buried beneath the adrenaline rush, the wind whipping at my face and running through my hair, the smooth, air-like feeling of gliding across the pristine, sparkling white snow. I whooped loudly as I dodged trees swiftly like a bird. Beside me, Damon was grinning like an idiot, dodging trees, but also pulling a few tricks: jumping of trees, grinding on a few logs, popping his board for higher jumps on bumps.
Show off. I'll show him. I followed up with a series of flat ground tricks like a nose-press backside, a 360, and buttering. Taking it as a challenge, Damon showed off a few more complex, risky tricks, some of which I was surprised he landed, but then again he had been boarding out here for years. Deciding to step it up a notch I set my board up for a front flip on a nice looking hill. The next thing I knew, I was face first in the snow with Damon hovering over me and laughing his head off. I sat there motionless in the snow, buried in embarrassment. When I didn't move, Damon's laughter finally ceased and actual worry lined his voice.
"Alaure?" he said, shaking me, "Are you okay?" I didn't answer, just to let him worry a little longer. I felt myself being lifted into soft arms and staring into Damon's goggled eyes.
"Ow," I said expressionlessly as my head began to throb.
"You stumbled over a branch that was sticking out."
"Oh."
"Where does it hurt?"
"My head mostly."
"Think you can get back up?"
"In a minute, probably." I laid my head back down into the cold fluff all around me, staring up into the cloudy, dimly lighted sky. Green and white pine trees tickled the faint blue and white sky as a few winter critters soared through the air.
"How much further down?"
"About 20 minutes."
"Okay," I replied, steadily getting up and back on my feet, "no more tricks for me."
"You really shouldn't have tried to impress me, you know."
"I wasn't trying to impress you," I said before making my way back down the slope.
We ran a few more rounds before tiring out. I was finally getting the hang of the snowmobiles too. It was actually a lot of fun once you learned how to shift your weight to keep from falling over. Worn out and hungry, we finally settled back into the cabin.
"Here," Damon said, handing me a brown paper bag, "I packed us some food."
"You made food for me?" I asked astonished.
"I'll take it back if—"
"No, no. I'm just surprised." Happily, I unrolled the top opening of the bag and pulled out the most delicious looking sandwich.
"He he, you made me a sandwich," I grinned.
"Just don't get used to it. Think of it as a thank you for those brownie-cookies."
"You really liked those didn't you?"
"Well yeah. It was different, delicious, and inventive. Do you know how to make anything else?"
"Yeah, I know a few other things my mom," my voice faltered a little, "that um, taught me."
Damon looked down at his lap, or his half-eaten sandwich, one of the two.
"When did...when did she...uh..."
"Die? When I was just a little girl of about six."
"What about you?"
"Huh? How do you know about my mom?"
"I-uh, when I was cleaning the living room with Nadya, I found a picture of you with your parents. By the way, why don't you have any pictures of people around your house?"
He chuckled. "I don't like keeping pictures of my family hung up. It's a sad reminder of who I've lost. And if I were to hang pictures of myself, I would feel vain and possibly a little creeped out to see my eyes following me everywhere."
I half smiled at him.
"To answer your question, my mom passed away when I was about 9."
"Do you miss her?"
"Sometimes. My best memories of her were when I was a lot smaller though, when we actually used to spend time together. Nadya became more of a mother to me than my mom when she became busier as I got older, so I guess I was able to handle it relatively well for a kid."
"Well good thing she taught you how to cook or I'd be starving right now."
He rolled his eyes, "Nadya taught me some too, and I learned some on my own too. Give me some credit. "
We both laughed lightly before being engulfed in silence once again.
"So what happened to your mom?" Damon asked.
I looked down at my shaking fingers. My eyes felt heavy but hollow like the feeling in my stomach. Moisture lined my eyelids, but I fought to keep them back. I didn't know when he had moved over, but Damon had his arms comfortingly wrapped around me. My entire body began to shake as dread filled my hollowness.
"I-um-uh," I barely whispered out in a choked voice.
"If you don't want to, you don't have to," he murmured soothingly. Just like what everyone says. Jayden was the only other person I had managed to tell the story to. Usually I would use the quick escape people offered 'you don't have to', but somehow it felt different this time. It had been years since anyone had asked me about my mom. Despite the tears, I felt stronger, and oddly comfortable with telling Damon.
I coughed a little and cleared my throat. "No, I don't mind. I shouldn't be so sensitive to it anymore after all these year. But I just miss her so much. I can't help but feel like my life would have been so different, so much better if she hadn't died," I managed out shakily.
Damon nodded in understanding, holding me so close that I was practically in his lap. I shifted my body so I could face him and wiped away my tears. I looked into his worried grey eyes. They didn't seem so cold anymore, but rather more pure and clear. I opened my mouth to start the tale, but I couldn't hold his gaze. Instead I chose to rest my forehead against his shoulder.
"I was a whiny little girl," I started out, my voice still slightly shaking, "Wild, carefree, unmanageable. I suppose I still kind of am. We had been out all day, it was nighttime then, and I begged my mom to get some ice cream on the way home. After unceasing pleading, my mom caved, and we stopped by at a supermarket. If I hadn't cried and complained so much we never would have gone there. Gosh I'm such an idiot."
"You were a kid, you didn't know any better," Damon said soothingly, stroking my hair to calm me down.
"I had this furry brown teddy bear always came with me wherever I went. I named him Corduroy after one of my favorite storybooks. He had a fluffy green tie and he'd been with me since the day I was born. He was a hand me down, but I loved him the most from all my stuffed animals. Anyhow, we were walking through the parking lot, one hand wrapped in hers, the other hanging loosely onto Corduroy. We had walked across the street to the door when I dropped him. I tried to get out of my mother's grip, but she was busy on the phone with my dad and didn't let me go as we continued to walk. Twisting out of her hand, I ran back onto the road only to be blinded and paralyzed by a pair of headlights. The next thing I knew I was on the floor, unharmed for the most part, and my mother was laying in front of me like...like road kill," I spat venomously.
My cheeks were wet again. I hadn't even noticed when I had started crying. Damon gently swiped his thumb across my cheeks and held me to his chest. I focused on the steady rise and fall of his chest, and the soft beats of his heart. Feeling comforted by his warm embrace.
"Shh, it's not your fault."
"It was my fault," I sobbed, "She's be alive if I weren't so whiny, if I hadn't let go of her hand, if I hadn't ran after my teddy bear."
"You didn't do anything wrong. She'd be alive if the driver had been paying attention. If they had been going at the proper 5 mph limit. Nobody blames you."
"That's not true," I replied bitterly. "My dad blames me."
His eyebrows furrowed, "Your dad?"
I looked away and nodded. We were both silent, breathing hard, deep in thought.
"That's why I get scared of you sometimes," I whispered.
He turned my face to look him in the eyes once again. "He beat you didn't he?" he asked sternly.
I gasped, "How did you..."
"The night we were out swimming I saw the scars on your back. I didn't quite figure out what they were. Even now I was just taking a wild guess."
"Oh," I said looking down.
"Can I see?"
"I-I-uh..." Well I'd come this far, I may as well tell him the whole story. I nodded my head and took my thermal off so it hung around my neck and covered my front side. The warm skin of his hard hands rubbed every so gently against the ragged skin of my back as if he were afraid I would turn into ashes. One arm came around my waist as he rested his head on my shoulder.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered, "I'm SO SO sorry for everything."
"You don't have to apologize. You weren't the one hitting me with broken bottles of alcohol." I felt as if he wanted to say something further, like he wasn't just apologizing about my abusive father, but he didn't pursue.
"What about your dad," I asked. Damon stiffened against my back.
"Things with my dad are a little bit more complicated than I can really explain."
"Tell me what you can. When did he pass away? How?"
"Heart attack. He never took care of himself, or anyone else for that matter. He only cared about his stupid company."
"The one which you now own, right?"
"The very same," he spat icily.
"You didn't want it?"
"No, not at all. It put me in a mess I didn't want to be involved in. It completely screwed up my life."
"What? Are you going to tell me that being rich is not all that it's cracked up to be?"
He gave me a hard look, "It's not, for me anyway. It came at a price far more than the value of anything I could buy."
Damon's face was contorted into an unfathomable pain, an internal agony.
"What did you want to be?" I asked to distract him from whatever dark thoughts were plaguing his mind.
He scoffed and then laughed. "I wanted to be a lot of things when I was a kid. The most reasonable was probably an engineer or inventor."
"But doesn't that kind of fit with the stuff your dad's company does?"
"It's...complicated."
I nodded, backing off the subject.
"Well what was your wildest career choice?" I smiled.
He chuckled with so much happiness that it felt like the dark aura of the room was immediately lifted. "There are a lot of those. Racecar driver, professional snowboarder, mad scientist, musician—"
"Musician? Is that what the studio in your house was for?"
"Yeah," he laughed.
"What did you play?"
"Oh, just the basics for a boy band ha ha: drums, electric and acoustic guitar, bass guitar, keyboard, and the piano. The piano was mostly because of my mom though. She used to play and she got me into it."
"Aw, that's cute. I'll make a note to myself to force you to play something for me one day."
He half smiled at me, "Your ears might bleed. I haven't practiced in years."
"I'm sure you still play well," I smiled, "So why didn't you chase any of those crazy dreams? You were well off. You didn't have to worry about actually making money."
"My dad wanted me to take over the company. I wasn't left with much of a choice."
"Oh..."
"So, your dad, is he still alive?" he asked.
"Sadly, yes."
"Do you still love him?"
I wavered for a moment, "No. I love who he used to be, but that man is long dead."
"So you see him in me?"
"Only when you're mad. My dad had quite the temper when he drank and when you got mad at me, I guess some part of my consciousness went into overdrive. The memories are surprisingly vivid for something that happened such a long time ago. It wasn't until I was brought here, though, that it started happening."
"When did you leave?"
"The moment I turned 18 and graduated."
"You put up with him for over 10 more years?!"
"Sort of. I was never really home unless I had to be, and never at night when he really got drunk. Jayden would let me stay at her house a lot."
He smiled, "Sounds like a good friend."
"Yeah, she's the best which is why I want her back."
He turned his head away, "So why didn't you tell anyone about your dad abusing you."
I shrugged. "When I was younger it was mostly because he threatened to hurt me more if I told anyone, but when I got older I guess it was hope that I would find the good man he once was again. He was my dad and I still loved him in a way."
"Yeah," he sighed, "I know how that is."
We both sat there quietly, lost in our own thoughts. He was being so open with me that I could barely resist from asking more, but I knew that we weren't really on good enough terms yet and I knew the second I pushed him past his comfort zone, he would snap shut.
"I wonder...if you can remember memories like your dad, maybe your subconscious could make you remember more about what happened when...never mind," he sighed giving up, "Let's get back home, kitten. I'm exhausted. If we wait any longer to drive home then I'll probably end up driving off a cliff."
"Hey, you never know, the impact might make me suddenly remember," I joked, "And then I'll finally know why the hell I'm in Alaska."
"Huh. Maybe you're right. Come over here, I'll slam your head into my iron abs to simulate it."
I raised an eyebrow at him, "I think I'd be closer to simulating the impact with a pillow than that flab you call abs."
"I am not flabby!" he retorted, raising his shirt, "Look at that, look at it! Does that look like fat to you?"
I sucked in a breath but covered it up with a laugh, "I think Bax's are much better. They're much firmer and more prominent."
"Yeah, maybe, but he's definitely lacking in other areas."
I scrunched up my eyebrows. "What do you mean?" I asked thoroughly confused.
"Oh kitten, you have the innocence of an 8 year old. C'mon, let's get out of here."
HOLY MOLY! MY GOD! You guys have made me ecstatic to come home and write more!
I cannot convey enough how happy you all have made me or how much you all motivate me :)
Ever since I started accumulating readers, it stopped being about just writing for me. It became about all of you too :) So THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH for all your support, motivation, and appreciation.
You all got me SO excited with all those amazing comments. I've been busy plowing through this chapter since I got back from San Antonio so I havn't had the chance to reply, but I definitely plan to.
This next chapter, I think, is going to blow your minds :) hopefully anyways. The pieces will finally slowly start to fall together...I hope you can catch on quick enough :D
Fun Fact!: I am in love with snowboarding. The house I stayed at last winter in Colorado is largely what the lower levels of the house is based off of. Maybe I can find and upload a picture. That house is so amazing. It's property value is about 1 million....maybe 2, I forget.
Oh and I love my daddy lol That part of Alaure is NOT based off me at all.♥