Axel's pov
"I will never be yours!"
Her words are ringing in my ears, cutting into my soul and breaking my heart.
This is the worst pain I have ever been in , it feels like my body is being torn in half. Arlo is howling and writhing in pain inside me. She rejected me, and left me lying on the ground. It's my fault, I know that, and that makes the pain even worse. "You should have accepted her right away, you cost me my mate!" Arlo is angrier than I ever thought possible, and his hate and anger towards me makes everything even harder. I feel myself drift in and out of conscience, and I must be on the ground for at least an hour, maybe more.
I have to get up.
"We have to go to her, we can still talk to her, make her understand why I did what I did. Make her understand how much I love her." I get no answer from Arlo expect for a pained whine. I feel desperate, but I need to believe that there's still hope, hope that she can forgive me and change her mind. I understand her anger, and I know now more than ever how wrong I was for seeing her as a tiger and not as Leila, as my mate.
"Leila, please talk to me, please let me explain!" I try to mindlink her, but she has closed her connection to the pack.
Get up, Axel!
I manage to scramble to my feet and while I clutch my chest I somehow drag myself back to the pack house. As soon as I come into view of the house a member of the pack, one of my warriors sees me, and runs to my side "What happened, Sir? Was there an attack?" I must look like I'm on deaths door, and in reality, I am. If this rejection takes real hold and Arlo gives up, my heart and body will succumb to the pain and I will die.
"Where is Leila? Have you seen her?" I manage to squeeze out even though my lungs are fighting for air.
"Did that fucking tiger do this to you? What the hell did she do?!?" He sounds pissed and worried.
"Don't you ever talk badly about her, do you hear me!" I all but scream back at him, "Now have you seen her?"
"No Sir, but I just got here, she might have passed by before I got out here."
I pull free from him and head for the door, maybe she is in her room?
"Have anyone seen Leila?" I mindlink the entire pack, someone must have seen her.
"She is in the woods near the southern border Sir!" Someone answers me, "She seems to be heading straight for the border, should we attempt to stop her?"
"No, let her pass, do not engage her!" I can't risk her or someone else getting hurt, she is way too strong for one or two wolves to handle alone. I shift and take off as fast as I can towards where she is. She can't possibly be thinking of leaving the pack, could she?
"She is leaving for a while Axel, said she needed some time on her own, apparently she's feeling a little overwhelmed by all the people around her," the Lunas voice comes through on the mindlink. I push myself to go faster, I have to get to her, I can't let it end like this.
Finally I pick up her heavenly scent, she just passed through this area, I can still stop her. But if she passes the border I have to stop. I can't enter no mans land without permission from the neighboring Alphas, that could provoke war.
Suddenly I feel it, it's a tickling in the back of my mind, it feels like a string is broken and I know that feeling, a member of the pack has left our borders. I'm too late, she is gone.
I skid to a stop and once again feel my heart breaking into even smaller pieces, Arlo takes over my mind and howls out his pain and grief. Then I once again collapse to the ground. This time I welcome the dark, maybe that can take away this pain?
I can hear movement around me, people talking in hushed voices. As I slip in and out of consciousness I can identify the voices of the doc, Anders, Kyle, Carl, Julie and many other members of my pack, but never the voice I want to hear. Leila doesn't come.
I have no idea how long I'm out, but when I finally find the strength to fight my way back to reality the first person I see is Anders. He's sitting in a chair next to what I can only assume is my hospital bed and he looks rough. Unshaven and with dark circles under his eyes, he looks like he's been awake for days.
"A...aa..alpha," I finally manage to croak out, my throat feels like sandpaper and my tongue is so dry it's hard to speak.
He startles, stands and rushes to my side. The look in his eyes is full of sympathy and pain.
"Why didn't you tell me she was your mate?" I guess my secrets out, and he must have seen the question in my eyes. "It was pretty obvious with the way you behaved and then collapsed. But I can not for the life of me understand your decision to keep this to your self, why didn't you say something? How could you not accept your own mate?"
I can't find a good answer for that, I don't even understand it myself, "I keep quiet and look away from his eyes, I can't take the judgment coupled with concern I see in them.
"Where...", my voice won't cooperate, but Anders seems to get what I need cause he reaches for the glass of water on the bedside table and helps me drink some through a straw.
I clear my throat and try again, "Where is Leila? Is she back? How long have I been out?"
"She's not here, we haven't heard a word from her after she left. You have been sleeping for 6 days." His voice is filled with pity.
"6 days? I've been out for almost a week? And Leila is still gone? My Goddess! What if something has happened to her? She could be hurt!" I try to struggle myself off the bed, but in my weakened state I can't even make myself sit up.
"Calm down Axel! I have contacted pretty much every pack there is, they know not to hurt her and try to make sure she is safe." He puts a hand on my chest and that's more than enough to keep me in place. "Alpha Colleen reported that she was on her packs land last night, she seemed fine, even took down a buck on her own. She seems no worse for wear."
Alpha Colleen? Her pack is over 900 miles away, she is so far from me, where is she going?
Suddenly the door to my room is flung open and in comes two people I have sorely missed, mom and dad are here, I haven't seen them for so long. They left to join my mothers old pack a few years back, I had my eyes set on the position of Head Warrior and stayed behind.
"Dad, I fucked up so bad! I lost her, I drove my own mate away. What am I going to do?" He walks right up to me on the bed and picks up my upper body, cradling me to him, and when his familiar scent and warm strong arms envelop me I can't keep myself from sobbing into his shoulder like a small child.
"Shhh, baby, don't cry, I'm sure this can be fixed," his voice is choked from trying to keep his own tears at bay. "She will come back, the mate bond is a powerful thing. She must be struggling her self, being away from you for this long." I try my best to believe him, but he didn't see the look on Leilas face, the hate and disgust she felt for me when she left.
As my sobs die down to calm crying he pulls away and my mom cradles my face in her hands, "I will not lose my son like this, there will be a happy ending to this, even if I have to track down the girl, sedate her and dump her in your bed. Don't think I won't do it, cause I will."
I can't help but laugh at that. And I do believe her, my mom is pretty fierce, she was Head Warrior before she left after all.
"Listen to your mother son, she is one crazy lady, your mate won't know what hit her if she unleashes some of that crazy on her." My dad looks at her with love and humor beaming from his eyes.
In some ways I guess I could say that he was the mother when I grew up, he was often the one who cooked meals and tucked me to bed, while mom was off training warriors and fending off attacks. But she had a set rule of being there for breakfast and she never missed those unless something unforeseen came up. They both worked together to make my childhood as carefree and happy as possible. I can only hope to be that good of a parent one day.
But to be a father I need Leila, and to get Leila I need to stay alive. If I am to achieve this I need to get out of this bed and somehow track her down.
So to hell with this rejection! I'm gonna fight, I will find my girl and I will convince her to give me another chance, I will convince her that I love her and make her love me.
And if all else fails, there's always my mom and a tranquilizer gun.
With newly found confidence I push aside my covers and swing my feet over the side of the bed, and fall face first on the floor.
Ok, so maybe the first thing I should do is eat something?
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Poor Axel! Or maybe not, he made his bed, time to lay in it.
He's gonna go get his girl. Do you think he will be successful? Or will the rejection kill him before he can? What would you like to see happen?
Vote, comment, follow!