I sat with Maria at her table. I and everyone else had already eaten. We lounged together. It's been a while since it had been just the two of us. Kahira, Killian, and Kuchel were outside with Sam, Jonathan, and Erwin along with the other kids.
I sunk my forehead into the palm of my uninjured hand and sighed.
"You okay?" Maria hesitated to ask.
"I don't get a choice on whether or not I get to be." I replied. "I really thought I lost them— all of them. To everyone their crime would be being born as my children. I almost lost you twice simply because you're friends with me."
"(F/n)–"
"I don't think you get it, Maria. People have wanted me dead before I was even born and now they're going after everyone I care about involved. The fact that I know that has been haunting me." I confessed. "The difference between Eren and I is: he wasn't born anyone special, but he sure as hell is making himself special." I commented. "Call me selfish, but I just want to live with Levi and my kids. I don't want to care about the Rumbling or anything else." I placed my hands in my head, "All I have to do is keep Levi and my kids alive and fight Eren and this will be over."
"So what do you plan to do?"
"The Yeagerist are everywhere. I need to hide my parents and find my kids somewhere safe to hide. After, I'll meet you with the old squad." I informed Maria. "I'll get Clayton to stay here with you for your and the kid's protection. Since everyone knows your connection to me. I need you to send one more letter to Nicole and that'll be it for you." I sighed. I looked out the window, "But I'm going to let the kids play a little longer."
Maria softly smiled at me. "It'll be over when it's over, don't worry too much."
"That's the hope... God, I feel like I'm gonna vomit." I draped myself over the table. Maria rushed over to get a trash can.
"About two months now?" Maria asked.
"Three months." I answered. I took the trash can from her hands.
"And you still look like that? Not even a tiny bump? I'm jealous."
I clutched over the trash can and released everything had I just eaten. Great, now I'm going to be hungry again with absolutely no appetite. I stayed over the trash can just in case. Maria laughed at my pain, "You're the one who said you'd never get pregnant again. Look at you now. Is Levi's-"
I threw a spoon at her to shut her up. She dodged and laughed it off. Maria's husband came into the dining and kitchen area. He greeted Maria with a kiss on her temple while keeping his hands on her swollen stomach. They were expecting very soon. He handed for a bouquet of flowers with a cute letter attached to it just because.
He greeted me as well, but I still slump over the trash can in a pile of pain. I just waved at him.
"Where are the children?" He questioned.
"Outside." Maria answered.
He nodded and headed outside. I was comfortable lifting my head up again. The nausea had gone away and was replaced by general pain.
"He's such a sweetheart. It makes me want to puke even more. Is he treating you right?" I questioned.
"Not a day he doesn't. He kinda has to. Did you forget Sam is my son?" Maria smiled. "But really he's wonderful. He does cute things for me all the time like this," referring to the flowers and letter, "And he makes me blueberry pancakes in the morning and he'll just randomly decide that I need a break and let me have an entire day to myself. How about Levi?"
"He calls me brat." I stated.
"And behind closed doors?"
"He still calls me brat, but he'll randomly decide that I'm not walking anymore and carry me. He also gives me a glass of water in the morning, then water and tea for breakfast and periodically through the day to make sure I'm hydrated. He's always a huge cuddler which is annoying sometimes especially when I can't get out of bed before him."
"When was the last time you saw him?" Maria questioned.
"A month ago." I informed her. "I'll see him again soon. I'm not worried about that."
|||
After my pregnancy symptoms weren't kicking my ass and I was back to being able to function, I said goodbye to Maria and her husband. I went outside to the children. I told them to prepare to go. They whined and complained about wanting to stay, I had to reason with them that we had to go.
I hooked Finn and Jake onto the wagon. I pet them lovingly, "Thank you so much for all your help guys." I told them happily.
I carried Max onto the wagon. I thanked him as well.
"Kahira, Killian, Kuchel, it's time to go." I announced. They said their goodbyes to Maria's children and the other children of the orphanage. Jonathan gave Kahira a flower to go. She smiled while taking it. My thoughts immediately went to Levi. Levi had Jonathan for the sole reason of his petty crush on Kahira.
Sam who was now a big nine-year-old came over to embrace me for my departure. His brothers, Jonathan and Erwin, did the same. I bid them goodbye as well.
Kahira, Killian, and Kuchel all got on the wagon. Before, I got in the front a wave of pain hit my head as a form of a headache. At first, I thought it was just the pregnancy, but all the kids felt it too.
"A scream..." Killian commented, "Uncle Zeke just screamed."
The children have never ever met Zeke before. Yet, they knew his name.
"What did you guys see?" I asked them.
"Uncle Zeke was in the forest and screamed." Kahira explained. "He was with Daddy."
"What happened when he screamed?" I asked. I couldn't see any of this, but they could as well as Levi. It was possible due to their Ackerman blood that they could see Levi, but personally, I didn't have that ability.
"Big monsters!" Kuchel said. Titans. Zeke yelled and turned all the soldiers around them into Titans. That'll leave just Levi and Zeke as humans, the Titans are under Zeke's command, so they wouldn't eat him. And I know for a fact, Zeke wants Levi dead.
He just took the lives of thirty soldiers and he's going to force Levi to kill his own comrades. Shit, that's going to mess him up.
"Will Daddy be okay?" I asked them.
"I don't know. Will he be okay, Mommy? The monsters look scary. Papa looked sad, Papa never looks sad." Kahira said with sad eyes. I hoped into wagon with them. I held them in my arms.
"Don't worry. Everything will be okay. Daddy is super strong, right? We'll see him super soon. And he'll be super happy when he sees you again. Until then can you be strong like Daddy." I told them. They nodded. I kissed their heads. "For now, Mommy is going to keep you safe. If I'm going to do that I need you to listen, okay." They nodded. "Stay quiet. Don't talk to anyone no matter what they say. When I say to do something do it immediately. Do you understand?"
They nodded.
"Good. Let's go." I said. I hopped to the front and started the horses. It was fine to head where this all started in Shiganshina.
I would be lying if I said there wasn't trouble trying to get passed the Yeagerist to get the wall. Thus far, I've gone undetected. The kids seemed tired. They've had a rougher time than I'd like them to have. They were abducted, thought I was killed, and saw they're father in danger.
I stopped at an inn to stay the night. I put the children's cloaks on and put their hoods on. I put my finger on my lips and told them to shush. "Remember keep your heads covered and stay quiet." I hopped out the front. I helped them down the wagon. Max could jump down himself.
I pulled my hood over my head. "Hold hands." I instructed the three of them. I pushed the door of the inn. A bell rang at my entrance.
"Welcome. What can I get for you?" The owner asked.
"One room, two beds." I stated.
"That'll be..." It didn't how much it would cost. I didn't have any money on me at the moment. I placed rocks on the counter and altered his memory to believe it was actual money. He handed me a key. "Enjoy your stay."
I took the kids to the room we'd be staying in. Once I closed the door behind us. I sighed and pulled my hood down. "Are you guys hungry?" I asked them.
They nodded.
"Okay. I'm going to get some food. Stay here. Do not leave this room. Do not answer the door. Do talk to anyone. Do understand me?" I said.
"Yea, ma'am."
I knelt down to their heights. "You guys have to protect each other, okay? You're siblings. I love you." I kissed all their cheeks. I love them more than anything in this world. I would protect them with my entire being.
I left through the window to get ingredients to cook dinner. I made it back with ingredients and few extra things. I prepared dinner and we all ate together.
Even if this wasn't ideal, they were still kids and they simply just brighten everything around them. Kahira sang her soup song while eating. It was a ritual she'd never go without singing her song when she ate soup. Killian ate his meal in a calm and peaceful manner, however, he'd get irritated when his twin would either scream in his ear or get in his space. Kuchel was still learning to feed herself and she was vey adamant on feeding herself without help.
I placed my hand on my stomach. I smiled at the sight of them and the thought of the one on its way. I was looking forward to meeting them so much. I knew Levi was too. He always got so excited when I announced I was pregnant. He gets all soft and babies me. It one of the only times I see him smile, genuinely brightly. He's been through so much and he just wants be able to have his family, have people he loved so dearly out live him die once. It's the reasoning he's so caring and particular when it came to us Ackerman-(L/n).
He lost his mother, Kenny, Isabel, Farlan, his squad, Erwin... and I know there's others to come.
I looked up to the ceiling hoping and praying Levi was okay. Saying I was worried was an understatement.
Eren and Zeke were my "brothers", Eren through the founding titan and Zeke though royal blood. The royal blood aspect of Zeke lead me to believe that he'd do something to harm Levi. Kahira's brother after all was the cause of her and her lover's death.
Once dinner was over. The kids put their plates away. Levi had raised children that cared way too much about cleanliness for their age. Though, there were times cleanliness went out the window for them and I swear each time that happened it looked like Levi's head was going to explode.
I exposed their desert so their dinner wouldn't be ruined. It was simply blueberry muffins. I had been craving sweets all day so I got some for the kids as well.
"Thank you, Mommy." Kuchel said. I smiled.
After I got them settled. I pulled the deck of cards I got and shuffled them. The only card game the kids could fully understand was Go Fish so I decided we'd play to pass time. I dealt the cards out.
The game went just fine.
All of a sudden in the middle of the game, I waved off shock and fear engulfed my sense. It was replaced a flush of excruciating heat and a jolting sensation that is not like anything I've ever experienced before in their lives. The only comparison I had was when Rod Reiss titan nape exploded.
Who knows we're here? Where did the explosion come from?
My first thought was if the were the kids okay. When my gaze fell on them, I realized there was no real explosion here. Then what was... I didn't even have enough time to react to the pain. I just simply collapsed. I felt blood drip down the corner of my lip.
"Mommy!" The kids screamed as I fell. I hit the floor with a large impact. I tried to gasp for air but then–
|||
I gasp for air. Suddenly, I found myself in the path. My hand snapped over my chest to fell my heart beat. I sighed. Okay, I'm alive.
My head snapped to the side. My heart dropped. All time seemed to freeze.
"L-Levi!" I screamed. I ran over to him. His injuries looked grotesque, cuts, scraps, and gashes decorated his body more than his skin. Blood flowed out of him like water. There were barely any traces of him behind his wounds. With his injuries, it looked like he was caught in an explosion. An explosion from that close would kill anyone. "No, no! You shouldn't be here! Why are you!?" I knelt down next to his burnt body. "Levi, you're going to be okay. You're going to be okay." I said to convince myself for than him. He wasn't even responding. "Please... Levi... please."
My life felt like it was crumbling before my eyes. As a doctor, his injuries... That feeling before that was you. What did Zeke do? Levi...
"You have to save him." A voice said behind me.
"How!?" I yelled through my tears. I wasn't even concerned about the stupid tears on my face. "How do I save him?" I couldn't take my eyes off of him. I begged Levi as if he could hear me, "Stay with me. After everything you can't leave me. You promised to come back to us... to come back to me. You're not a liar. You promised to stay."
"Issac also promised he'd stay." Kahira said.
"Issac. That's the Ackerman who died?" I asked. "Are you saying that-" I looked down at Levi.
"You were suppose to save him this time." Kahira told me in a calm manner. "I trusted you... I suppose I can wait. Kahira or Kuchel will do. They'd be saving Killian in that case."
"How are you giving up so easily?" I questioned. "There has to be a way." I insisted.
Kahira looked down at Levi's figure, her eyes said it all. She simply picked up her chains and walked away. She walked over to a dead body that laid against the sand. She sat next to it. "After all the years, he's been dead what do you expect. You'll get use to it. This is the first time I'm seeing him in so so long and I still can't reach him. We'll have to wait for the next lifetime, Issac... wait a bit longer." A single solemn tear fell from Kahira's eye. "I was suppose to save you. I failed again. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I know you just want to go home. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We won't get to rest, yet... just wait a little while longer." She laid down next to him.
I could see it. Issac was trapped his entire life and he was trapped in his state in his afterlife. And Kahira was confined to whatever title she possessed like she's confined in her afterlife. What kept them apart in their lifetime was still keeping them apart now.
You're not dead. I looked at Levi's bloody face. I held his face in my hand. Please, Levi. How am I suppose to save you?