Killing Swans

Chapter 11 - Don't want you to want me

Present 

"And one last time, un deux trois, un deux trois!" James called as Milo, me and Chloe were just rehearsing what we had learned yesterday with Zoe, since Chloe was second cast and needed to rehearse as well. I had to say, I liked working with her a lot more than with Zoe, but truthfully, I could have worked with an amateur or...a cow and it would have still been better than Zoe, that bitch. I was glad we all got a day off from her, since she called in sick today, probably still hung over from last night's party. 

Chloe was really good and a fair team player as well. The three of us dancing, it worked, even though there was a little bit of tension between me and Milo. I mean, with him everything was fine, though he seemed a little worried about me, which annoyed me. But for me, nothing was ok. Because I had enjoyed that little talk with him at the party. It was short lived, but I felt comfortable and maybe in another life, he could have become my friend. And we came too dangerously close to being exactly that, so I didn't know how to approach him anymore. 

Luckily, so far we hadn't had a chance to talk in private yet, since I came here early again and he didn't. And my lunch I always skipped and rather ate a quick protein bar, while continuing to rehearse. I hadn't eaten lunch in a long time, it just seemed unnecessary and in the cafeteria of the company, it was the old high school bullshit of where to sit and with whom. I didn't need that, not at the moment at least. 

"Perfect you guys, that was really good, thought I sense a little bit of tension here" James said, pointing at us and Chloe seemed really confused, because she just joined the team, how could there already be tension? "Really? I think we did really well, but we could-" 

"Not you darling, I mean my princes. Now I don't wanna butt in on your business, but that is not how I want you two to interact on stage. I have to run now, I am meeting a...very handsome young man for dinner, but if I were you two, I'd resolve this before the weekend, ok? Tomorrow I will be working on the group session, but I think you two should put in a training day as well" James commented. Fuck. I was normally good at faking a connection on stage, it was my job, but only because I had nothing to do in real life with my dance partners. They were like dolls to me. But if Milo would be a doll, he would be Chucky. That's how stubborn he was and wouldn't just let me be. Ugh...now it was even affecting my performance!

I glanced at him and he threw me a small smile, probably also not understanding what the matter was here and I felt ashamed. Again, I was ruining everything. I wanted to impress James so badly and I just ended up disappointing him. I wanted to keep Milo away from me and now I was just making everything worse. 

"Now, toodles and I will see you all on Monday!" James called, before he left the studio and slowly the crew got up as well, leaving us behind. Milo, Chloe and I just awkwardly stood around, not sure if we were supposed to leave now as well or what we should do until we were all alone. Well this was awkward. 

"Huh, James was weird today, right? I mean, what kind of troubled connection did he mean, that is just bullshit. You two were amazing and Milo you know I am not throwing compliments like this around very easily. Really Henry, I'm impressed! Well, I would love to stay and rehears with you a little longer, though for today, in my opinion, you two don't need it, but I'm meeting Soo for dinner and I think she's really excited about it, so...I'm sorry" Chloe said and I bit my cheek. 

Now she would leave us alone as well? I mean, James didn't actually make us stay here, if Milo and I would just decide to go home, he couldn't stop us, since a connection could be faked and wasn't something we had to train on. But if we would stay, we would probably just rehearse the dance moves and get better at that, so at least we wouldn't have to talk that much...right?