What If...I Remember?

Chapter 60

"Qian Qian, I'm here."

Bai Qian only knew she was overwhelmed with relief as she buried her head in Ye Hua's chest, glad that it had not been him who had sacrificed his soul to the bell. "I promised, Qian Qian. I would not leave you behind." Ye Hua smiled at her, his thumbs wiping away the fat pearls of tears that slid down her cheeks, having overflowed from her eyelids, "And I keep my promises, Qian Qian."

"You..you scared me." Bai Qian wiped her own tears, straightening up in his embrace, before she suddenly realised that she still didn't know who the person had actually been. Her eyes sweeping the crowd, Bai Qian couldn't quite put her finger on who had exactly disappeared, and Ye Hua understood at once, lowering his head so that his lips were level with her ears, and he spoke quietly, "Qian Qian...it was Li Jing."

A sudden feeling washed over Bai Qian as she looked up at Ye Hua, who had already led her slowly towards the body of the dying Li Jing. Finally waking to her senses, Bai Qian ran forward, lifting Li Jing's head gently as she placed it on her lap, and Li Jing gave another cough, blood gurgling from his mouth like a water fountain. "A-Yin..." Li Jing's voice was frail, his chest rising and falling erratically as he struggled for the time he had left, "A-Yin?"

"I'm here, Li Jing." Bai Qian spoke, leaning closer, but not too close, for Ye Hua stood, not too far away, watching, and Li Jing lifted a shaky hand, his fingers twitching as he lost control over them, "A-Yin..." "Why? Why sacrifice yourself?" Bai Qian asked softly, her voice full of incomprehension, but Li Jing merely smiled, his eyes managing to focus on her briefly, despite his efforts, and his fingers finally brushed her cheek after hovering around in midair, and understanding his actions, Bai Qian pressed his hand to her cheek, "Why, Li Jing?"

"A-Yin...you love the Crown Prince. And he loves you...I've seen how you look at each other..." Li Jing wheezed, his cough splattering blood onto Bai Qian's armour, and despite the lurching of her stomach at the stale, metallic scent of blood, Bai Qian didn't move, and Li Jing sank further into her arms, unable to sit up any further, "You have everything to live for, A-Yin. And I have nothing. Living means nothing to me, and if I could, I would choose no other death."

"How brave you are, A-Yin..." Li Jing suddenly dropped his hand, and Bai Qian froze as he placed his hand on her raised abdomen, and beside her, she could hear Ye Hua growling faintly, be it in protectiveness or anger. "You came to the battle, without fear. You have always been more valiant than I have...I am just a coward, A-Yin..." "Don't say that. You fought a phoenix alongside me, remember? And you once dashed into hellfire to rescue me." Bai Qian reminded him of his courage, knowing that Li Jing wanted her to do so, and he closed his eyes briefly, before he reopened them, "You were that Su Su?"

"Su Su and I...we're the same person. As is Si Yin and I." Bai Qian answered softly, and Li Jing gave a short bark of laughter, all he could manage, "So I rescued you once, A-Yin...but there's no more time for you to repay me...or maybe...? It's simple, A-Yin...a dying man's wish..."

"You have a son, don't you?" Bai Qian interrupted, having suddenly remembered Ye Hua's mention of Xuan Nü's stillborn, and Li Jing's face hardened over, before he shook his head, "Xuan Nü was delusional. It was never a boy...it is a girl. A stillborn girl, that Xuan Nü insists is still alive...but I have lost all hope..." "But what happens if you die, Li Jing? Who will take the throne? Your child?" Bai Qian furrowed her brows in concern, but Li Jing shook his head with whatever strength he had left, "Yan Zhi...Yan Zhi will take my throne...but...you must help her, A-Yin...she is too...compassionate..."

A harsh cough burst from Li Jing's lips, blood draining completely from his features, and Bai Qian knew that the Ghost Lord no longer had time to live. "I have a request...A-Yin..." The Ghost Lord had sensed that death already awaited him, and it was all he could do to cling on, his last wish a desperate one, "Can...can you say it to me? A...a l-last time...?" "What is it?" Bai Qian leant in closer, Li Jing's voice fading too much for her to hear, and the Ghost Lord struggled to emphasize, "I...I can't remember you ever saying it...but could you...could you tell me, again...that you...that you love me?"