What If...I Remember?

Chapter 34

"Su Jin greets Mother." Su Jin entered Le Xu's chambers with a charming smile, Xin Nu following behind her, and Le Xu looked up from her scroll with an approving nod, "Su Jin, it's great that you're here; it's been a lonely, cold morning. Come, sit with me, and let me take a look at you."

"Has Sister Bai Qian not come over?" Su Jin widened her eyes innocently, glancing around the room, and Le Xu gave a sigh, "Haven't you heard the rumours? Apparently, Ye Hua abducted her from her room last night and brought her to another chamber. Ye Hua would never be like this; I say that Bai Qian has seduced him."

"Well...she is very attractive, Mother." Su Jin poured steaming tea into Le Xu's cup, and Le Xu turned her nose up at Su Jin's words, "Attractive, indeed, so much so that she draws men's eyes to her like a magnet if she were so much as to show up in any place. I see no good end for Ye Hua if she attracts all the men deities of the Nine Heavens."

"But I doubt she would go with any of them, Mother. After all, Ye Hua loves her as she loves him, Mother. He has never laid eyes upon Su Jin as he has done to her." Su Jin made an expression full of bitter resentment, and Le Xu patted Su Jin's lap, "Give him time. He still hasn't forgiven you about the entire issue with Su Su, has he?"

"He has not. But he has begun treating Sister Bai Qian as he would do if she were Su Su. Mother, it seems to Su Jin that Sister Bai Qian has a higher place in his heart because she looks exactly like Su Su." Su Jin complained, and Le Xu sighed, "It would not be up to me to manage Bai Qian, for she is powerful, after all. But if I could, I would definitely not let her take advantage of Ye Hua; for we all know Si Yin ever once had an affectionate relationship with his Shifu."

"But there could be a way, Mother." Su Jin suddenly sat straighter, "Hasn't Ye Hua entrusted A-Li to Sister Bai Qian? Surely Ye Hua did that because he thought she would treat A-Li well. But what if...Ye Hua saw her mistreating the only piece of Su Su left?" Su Jin had a wicked smile on her face, and Le Xu considered it for a moment, "You don't say...and if we could get Ye Hua to leave A-Li in your care, he would eventually resolve his grudge against you...and instead shift his grudge to Bai Qian."

"That would be excellent." Le Xu affirmed, giving Su Jin a reassuring pat, and Su Jin only felt evil bubbling up in the depths of her heart.

Bai Qian...I, Su Jin, am not that easy to bully. If I could get rid of Su Su, I can get rid of you...just you wait, Bai Qian, I'm coming for you...

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"Gugu..."

Bai Qian opened her eyes with a start. Seated on the floor before her was Feng Jiu, and even as Bai Qian rubbed her eyes sleepily, sitting up from her bed, she noticed that Ye Hua was no longer in bed, and knowing that Bai Qian would ask of Ye Hua almost at once, Feng Jiu answered before Bai Qian could ask, "Gufu went to settle some documents, and Little A-Li was brought away to study again."

"Whatever has happened to you?" Bai Qian finally noticed the red rims of Feng Jiu's eyes and the falling ruins of Feng Jiu's hairdo, and Feng Jiu leant forward, placing her head against Bai Qian's knees, "Gugu...Di Jun called me naïve..." With that, Feng Jiu burst into tears promptly, and Bai Qian pulled her up onto the bed with alarm, "Di Jun did what?"

"He called me naïve and gullible, Gugu..." Feng Jiu looked into Bai Qian's eyes with her own tear-filled ones, and Bai Qian stifled a smile, "I mean...he's not wrong. You're still young Feng Jiu, and there's a lot more to the world that you are ignorant of, and this ignorance gives you your naïvety. But it also gives you your innocence, Feng Jiu, which makes you yourself and no one else."

"Really?" Feng Jiu wore hopefulness in her expression, and Bai Qian gave a slight frown, "Yes. But I do not believe Dong Hua Di Jun would outrightly say such a thing without a context. What happened before he said such a thing?" "I..." Feng Jiu gave a thought about it, her tears drying as she forgot about her sadness in her attempt to recall the scene, and after a while, she replied Bai Qian embarrassedly, "I...asked Di Jun about the trial."

"You silly girl!" Bai Qian exclaimed in exasperation, "How could you ask him about the trial?!" "Gugu, what wrong did Xiao Jiu do?" Feng Jiu cowered in confusion, "Xiao Jiu only thought...only thought that Di Jun might have been hurt by Xiao Jiu's actions..." "Xiao Jiu, even if it wasn't you, someone would be bound to hurt Song Xuan Ren's feelings. Di Jun was down in the Mortal Realm precisely to feel those kinds of hurt, and to remind himself why he mustn't have any romantic relationships." Bai Qian explained, and Feng Jiu didn't understand, "But Gugu, why would anyone want to purposely feel upset?"

"Not purposely to feel upset, but to those who have long isolated themselves from the world's issues, they have lost touch with such mundane feelings, Xiao Jiu. They need such trials to just remind themselves of why they sit isolated now. And it is only a reminder, Xiao Jiu. It matters not to them who delivered that trial. That's why Di Jun said you were naïve." Bai Qian saw Feng Jiu shrink slightly, and she took a pause, contemplating if she should stop. After all, it wasn't every day that Feng Jiu was lectured, and the Little Princess of Qing Qiu was used to being spoiled and getting off the hook. But Bai Qian hardened her heart. Better she told Feng Jiu, than Feng Jiu learnt it the hard way. Taking a slow breath, Bai Qian resumed her lecture.

"You believed that Di Jun felt the pain because of your actions, but it was arranged all from the start, Xiao Jiu. The only role you played was to deliver his trial, and the only hurt truly felt was by you, because you are smitten with Di Jun." Bai Qian kept her gaze on Feng Jiu throughout her own explanation, watching as her niece's lips trembled again, and Feng Jiu felt a burning heat rise in the rims of her eyes as tears welled up and threatened to spill again, her lips numb as she managed a single word, "Oh."

Watching as silent tears slid down Feng Jiu's cheeks, Bai Qian knew that her niece was most certainly upset over what had just been told to her, and wiping Feng Jiu's tears, Bai Qian spoke gently, "Xiao Jiu, it may sound harsh and mean, but Gugu is telling you these for your good. You are already 32000 years old, Xiao Jiu, and you must grow up." "I know, Gugu, I'm just...sad." Feng Jiu sniffled, and Bai Qian wrapped her arms around Feng Jiu, "Cry, if you need to. You have a right to feel upset."

And Feng Jiu buried her head into Bai Qian's chest, and cried her heart out, for all the pain it was worth.

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A/N: Goddamnit, every time once I'm free af, all my inspiration evades me and I'm left with writer's block...

Anyway, here's a chapter...and it'll take a while to the next one, but just be sure to look out for it :)

Z, out <3