Heartbreaker ~ Larry Stylinson {English}

5. Feelings.

~ Pov Harry ~ 

After a quiet car ride and a half hour of putting camera's all over my house I let myself sit on my bed. God, what am I doing? I should be at school, not hiding a fucking camara on my desk. They are everywhere in this house. An the thought that every single thing that Louis and I will do will be on videotape makes even me a little bit sick. I admit that the bet is extreme this year and that I would rather do something else, but I can't. Besides, I could really use the money.

"Harry?" I look at Mel who's sitting next to me. "Yeah?" "Are you sure you want to do this?" I roll my eyes. "I have to." "But don't you think it's wrong? I mean I'm all in for a joke and a nice bet, but this? This is extreme, Harry. You don't have to do this. We can still come up with another bet." "Yeah," I laugh. "Luke would be happy to hear that. He was ready to beat the crap out of me, just for thinking no. If I refuse to do this he'll think of me as some sort of scared little boy. He's the one that took me into your group, I can't let him down." "But aren't you though?," she asks while biting her lip, "Scared?"

I look her straight into the eyes. "No. I'm not." She sighs. "But what about Louis' feelings? Did you think about him?" "Should I?" "Yes! You two have history together. You were best friends with the guy. The two of you had a bond and you're going to throw that all away by using him, recording him and breaking his heart. Don't you think he deserves  better than that?" I shrug. "I threw that all away 5 years ago when I decided to never look back again. There's nothing for me to lose."

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I take my phone out of my pocket. "I have nothing to fear." "Harry, I remember what happened last summer and-" "Mel," I interrupt her, my voice harsh. "Don't."

I look for Louis' number and start to type when I find it.

Harry: Hi. Care to stop by my house after school? My parents aren't home and I'd really like to talk to you.

It takes a few minutes before he responds.

Louis: Okay. I'll be there. Only if you promise to not act weird.

Harry: Don't know what you mean by that 😉

With a sigh I look at the camera. I'm ready. At least, I hope I am. Because I can't and I won't back out of this.

~ Pov Louis ~ 

I 'm sitting next to Liam in the lesson when I receive a text from Harry. I hesitate before I open it, but do it anyway.

Harry: Hi. Care to stop by my house after school? My parents aren't home and I'd really like to talk to you.

I look at my phone and consider going to his house, talking with him. But what is there left to talk about? I think I was clear before. I sigh and decide to give it a chance.

Louis: Okay. I'll be there. Only if you promise to not act weird.

It takes him a few seconds to reply.

Harry: Don't know what you mean by that 😉

I roll with my eyes, deciding it's better that I don't respond. Because I know we'll get into an argument before we get a chance to talk. I bite my lip while thinking about it. About it all. Even the kiss. It felt good. And it shouldn't be. I don't want it to be. I can't give in, knowing it won't do me any good.

Liam gives me a nudge. "Louis? Is everything okay?" I nod, but Niall who looks at my phone from the desk behind, interrupts me. "Louis? Why are you texting Harry?" I turn my phone of. "Just because." "Why is he asking you to come over? What does he want to talk about? And how is he acting weird?," he continues to ask, showing me he read every single word. I look at the both of them. I can't hide this from them. I always tell them everything. And I don't want to lie. "I have to tell you something. But promise me you won't judge," I beg them. Liam looks at me. "What happened?"

I keep my movements small and my voice quiet so the teacher doesn't notice anything. "Harry kissed me." Niall looks at me, his eyes wide. "And it wasn't once. He keeps trying to-" I stop myself. "He keeps trying what?," Liam asks concerned. "He offered to teach me stuff." Niall frowns. "Like what? French? To be honest you do need to work on that." I roll my eyes. "No. Not that kind of stuff." "Than what?" I shift uncomfortable in my chair. "Well, you know... Stuff." They both still look at me, no clue what I'm talking about. "He didn't actually say what, but I'm pretty sure he meant like- you know." "Sex?," Liam asks. "Yeah. I think so. Or something that has to do with that. Because he was kissing me, saying that he wanted to teach me so much more. So it has to be that, right?"

Niall shakes his head. "Wait. Are we talking about the same Harry here? Harry who you were best friends with? Harry who you can't stand? Harry the straight Harry?" He sounds confused. And honestly? I can't blame him. I am too. "Did you like kissing him?" I look at Niall. "I mean it wasn't bad... It's just- It was weird. I didn't expect him to kiss me, ever. Nor did I ever wanted him to. It just kind of happened." "Do you want him to do it again?" "Did you hear what he just said?," Liam asks Niall, "he never wanted him to, so no." I bite my lip, frustrated. "I don't know actually." They both snap their head at me. "What do you mean?" I shrug. "It's just- I know what he did was wrong, but I can't help but wanting to do it again. Just one more time. Just to-" I shake my head. "I don't know. It's confusing. He's confusing me. And he wants to talk. After school. I don't know what to expect. Or what not. It's driving me crazy."

"I don't blame you," Niall says, "I'm confused too. I mean, he kisses you, telling you he wants to teach you so much more than that. But he has never kissed a boy before, so how would he know what to do?" I shrug. "That part isn't that confusing. He slept with a boy before when he was drunk, but that doesn't solve the him-being-straight issue." "Wait. How do you know that?" "He told me when me and my parents were at his house. It was last summer. I'm not quite sure why he told me, but he did." "The question is, why didn't you tell us?" I shrug. "I just guessed that I was not supposed to tell anyone."

"Don't go," Liam suddenly says, "after school. Don't go. Something about this isn't right. Think about it, you guys can't stand each other so there's no reason for him to kiss you, let alone want more than that. He doesn't get anything from it." I bite my lip, thinking about it. Liam is the most protective one of us. But also the smartest.

He sighs and lays his hand on top of mine. "We all know that Harry and his crew do a bet every year. What if this year is Harry's turn? What if you're his bet?" I bite the inner side of my cheek to hold the tears that come with this sick thought. Would he really do that? Could he really do something like that to me? I know we can't stand each other but we used to be best friends. Would he really do something as sick as that? I look at Liam. "You really think he would go that far?" He shrugs. "I don't know. But there is always a possibility."

Niall shakes his head. "I don't think he would do something like that. I mean, we all know that he's capable of much. But this? I think if you want to figure things out with him and you know, explore your options with him, than you should." "And I think it's a bad idea," Liam argues with Niall. "He's going to hurt you. He always does." I shake my head. "No. He can't hurt my feelings if there aren't any there."