we shouldn't

nine • 05/14/14

TW: Rape

Flashback.
May 14, 2014

My door opens up and my foster father walks into the room sitting next to me on the bed.

"What are you up to?" He asks.

"Homework" I mumble.

"You should take a break don't you think? You've been so busy with homework lately" he smiles.

"Yeah" I nod, grabbing my books and walking over to the desk to set them down.

I feel his strong arms pick me up from behind.
"What are you doing?" I giggle.

"Having some fun" he laughs "I know a great stress reliever" he says, placing my back on the bed.

"I could use a stress reliever" I laugh.

"Great" he smirks.

I lay down flat on my back and he sits at the foot of the bed and starts rubbing my feet.

"Does that feel good?" He asks with a disgusting smirk.

"I guess" I mumble.

Next thing I know he's removing my pants.

"Wh-what are you doing?" I mumble.

"Relieving your stress" he smirks.

He tears off my underwear and picks me up, throwing me on my hands and knees on the bed. The next thing I feel is extreme pain pulsing up my vagina and stomach.
"STOP STOP IT HURTS" I scream at the top of my lungs.

"SHUT UP" he shouts, smacking my face and grabbing my hips harshly. Pumping his length in and out of me quickly.

"It hurts" I cry out, "PLEASE stop"

"Stop"

"It hurts"

"P-please"

"S-stop"

It goes on for what feels like forever. Eventually, I give up on shouting, realizing no one will hear me. Tears stream down my cheeks as I grimace in pain, unable to get out of his hold.

I feel some warm liquid on my lower back and he smacks my butt.
"Now go shower and If you say a word to anyone you'll regret it," he says sternly, zipping up his jeans.

-
-
-

"What'd you want to tell me?" Billie asks softly.

"When I was fourteen, I was placed in my second foster home. I had been there for two months and everything was going pretty good. I was starting to trust my foster parents a lot." I start, staring out my window. "One night I was doing homework and my foster father at the time came in the room telling me to take a break. I-I got up to put my work on the desk. H-he picked me up"
I pause and take a deep breath.

"Spencer you don't hav-

"I want to tell you. I've never told anyone" I sigh, letting one tear fall from my glistening eyes.

"Okay," she smiles, reaching her hand out and interlacing my fingers with hers.

"He picked me up from behind and set me on the bed. He started massaging my feet, he said he would help relive my stress" I pause and wipe away more tears that I can't keep in.
This man didn't relieve stress, he only made it worse. A whole lot worse.

"Then he took off my pants and threw me on all fours... I was a virgin" I mumble.

I look up through blurry eyes and Billie wraps her arms around me. I lean into the crook of her neck and let out sobs that I'd been bottling up.

"I tried to scream..b-but no one heard me" I cry into her shoulder, muffled by her sweatshirt that I had now completely soaked.

"I'm so sorry Spencer" she whispers, rubbing her hand up and down my back.
I pull away and she grasps both my hands in hers.

"It took me years to even let someone hug me. I've come a long way but some things I still can't deal with. Like when people pick me up from behind or hug me from behind. I have to know it's coming otherwise I freak out" I explain.
Billie nods her head and lifts her hand to my face, wiping a tear away.

"I'm so sorry you went through that" she whispers looking me right in the eyes.

I nod my head and look into her twinkling eyes glistening with tears that haven't fallen yet.

"I will always be here to listen to you," she says.

"I wish I could believe that but" I look down at my lap and remove my hands from hers, "but I can't" I mumble.

"Hey hey hey" she whispers, picking up my chin with two fingers. "I will always be here. Even if you move. You will never be alone" she assures me in a soft tone.

I nod my head lightly, trying to believe what she says can be true but it just can't. When you get to know me and tear back my layers, no one ever stays...no one.

Now, should we get home?" She asks.

I nod my head and lean in for one more hug. I feel her kiss the top of my head and I smile into her shoulder. Smelling coconut and cherries. She always smells so good.

A/N: Sorry it's short 🤷🏻‍♀️