Not Some Princess ✓

15. Thank you for dinner

15

Thank you for dinner

I've been staring at the edge of the water
'Long as I can remember, never really knowing why
I wish I could be the perfect daughter
But I come back to the water, no matter how hard I try
Every turn I take, every trail I track
Every path I make, every road leads back
To the place I know, where I can not go, where I long to be
—How far I'll go
(Auli'i Cravalho)

I WAS a really healthy kid in school and I had no problem with that. I got the need to be fit when I was just going to begin college. I just had to do something about it because I was just killing myself by self-esteem issues and unhealthy fasting. It was when I wanted the world to just shut the hell up about my figure.

Yes, I know how I look. Thank you, for your NOT needed opinion.

But as you grow up you realise that there are much more serious things in this world than your looks. There are things like environmental issues, rape, human trafficking that scare you enough to never come out of your room again.

But it's amazing how unpredictable life can be. Ten years later a person can be talking about the experience that once seemed haunting but now you realise that they made you who you are. And in a strange way, you become lowkey thankful to the horrendous of things in your life.

Because at the end you turned into a diamond and all the pressure was accountable for it. Without it, you probably wouldn't have been where you are today.

I contemplated bailing on Zach as I parked my car in front of the restaurant he asked me to meet at. I had the ring in my purse which I needed to return to him. Half of me wanted to just throw it in the trash and tell him I lost it.

He wouldn't care. He could easily afford more like these and I'll end up making a fool of myself.

I sighed as I decided it was time to face the music. I looked at the rear mirror and my reflection. Perfect hair, not a hair out of place, perfect makeup, and my red dress that perfectly hugged me in all the right places. I needed all the ammunition I could use today.

My red pumps patted the pavement as I opened the door and my waves flowed a bit from the light air that hit my face. I removed my sunglasses and put them inside my car and took my clutch and shut the door and locked my car.

I pursed my lips as I strode towards the entrance with my chin up high. I had a chat with my mom in the morning informing her that it was over with Zach and there was absolutely no potential. She wasn't happy about it but she couldn't do anything to change it either. She knew it was ultimately my decision.

Or I drilled that into her, that it was, a thousand times.

But okay.

The restaurant was dim lighted, expensive-looking chandeliers decorated the ceiling and purple plush furniture sat around the oak tables. I gave my coat to a lady and let in a puff of warm air and rubbed my stone-cold hands together. Thank God the room was warm or I might have turned into an ice candy.

A waiter greeted me and I notified him I was here to meet someone. He asked my name which I told him and he asked me to follow him.

I followed the guy and I found Zachary sitting on a table in a private corner chatting up with a young woman.

I sighed.

I can do this.

"Hello, Zach."  I announced confidently with a polite smile on my face as both of them met my eyes. Zach gave his usual side tilted smile and the woman blushed.