Alex Hunter(Completed)

45- Midnight Decisions

(Song: Midnight Decisions - Sia)

My breath is knocked out of me as I stare at him wide eyes and my mouth slightly ajar,my brows knot worriedly at what he just told me.

How? When? No one was outside!

"What?" I ask breathlessly. Oh no!

He swallows, clenching his jaw and fisting his hands and I can't decipher if that's because of anger or sadness. His stern look remains on me.

"Yes" a stiff nod "around that time we took our caps off".

I figured! That's the only way they'd see our faces.

I think I'm going to be sick, I clench my stomach, a shaky breath escaping my lips as I struggle to keep packing.

My mind reels with lots of thoughts, one of it being that my life cannot be the same. The whole world knows about us! Honestly, not that I don't like it but I'm leaving! It's not like Alex is sticking with me, he's sticking with June. I think that's what makes me sicker. Knowing that he's letting me go. After everything!

Argh!

"Keila" he calls me.

I don't reply. The rage engulfs me, I throw my stuffs furiously in my box. I can't believe this! He's not going to hold me back. I feel so stupid.

Yes I knew! Yes I saw this coming! Yes I foolishly thought he started having feelings for me!

How would I go to work? How would I do anything? The whole world will be keeping tabs on me for as long as, I'll be called the side chick or something, painted black, maybe.

It will never be the same!

"Keila" he takes a step towards me.

"Don't" I say sharply, shakier breaths louder now, I stare at him, the tears threatening to break out.

"I thought-" I stop myself when I notice that I'm definitely going to cry if I speak further, and I'm not ready to show him tears, anything but that.

I shake my head and zip my box, dragging it and hauling it to the floor I roll it, grab my phone and my keys from the table and make my way out of the room.

I struggle to get the box down the stairs, Alex follows me slowly and when he attempts to him me I shove him off.

He has an appalled look on his face but I don't care! He's letting me go, he could go fuck himself for all I care. It hurts so much, the feeling of rejection hurts bad.

As I finally trudge down the last stairs and stride to the door, I shoot June a glare. She's standing there, hands folded and a challenging glare aimed at me.

I don't even know if I'm meant to put her in her place for talking to me like that, but in all honesty, I'm the one who got cozy with her man.

So I stomp out instead, avoiding Alex face and everything about him as I march for my car.

As I shove my box into the boot, I see Alex occupy the door out of the corner of my eyes. Why can't he just go away! Showing up isn't helping! Seeing him just hurts more.

I slam the boot shut and stomp to the front of my car, unlock it, swing the door open and furiously slam it shut.

When I start the car and drive out after Harry opens the gate for me, my shoulders starts to shake uncontrollably as I give into the tears I've managed to subdue. My vision blurs with tears, my jaws quiver and my loud cry fills the air of the car.

I feel so incensed and dejected and heartsick and blighted. This has marred me, and it will for a long time.

"Fuckkkkk" I scream as I punch my hand severally against the steering wheel. The pain that shoots up my hand is a strange comfort to my suffering heart.

I want to throw something! Anything!

Another scream rips through me as I throw my head back into the seat and presume my sob. Maybe I should stop driving and just cry my heart out, getting into an accident is not something I'll venture into but I need to get home. I need to cry into my pillow and lock myself inside forever.

I grip the steering thighter and ignore my ringing phone. It's probably Alex, maybe. Either way I don't want to speak to him, he'll hear the tears in my voice.

Sobbing breaths leaves my nose, my thightned lips despairingly trying to hold in my cries. A shaky hand comes up to clap my quivering lips.

Oh God. It feels worse than I thought.
How am I going to face the world? My mum and Donald and Levi were right, I'm the one getting burned now. Alex has reunited with the love of his life and I'm kicked out.

He didn't even hold me back! Darn him! I hate him so much right now, I wish I never even met him. He watched me leave. Oh shit, what was I expecting anyway? It was bound to happen.

His words from our game of twenty-one questions play in my mind.

I'd change the way I just...let people go, even when they are worth it.

He let me go. What I don't know is if I'm worth it. Was I ever worth anything? The look of adoration in his eyes when he looked at me, the care in his hugs, the passion in his touches and the fire in his kiss.

Oh God. I doubled over in another cry. I miss him too. I hate him but I miss him.

I thought we had something going.

**

I use my leg to kick my door shut. I discard my box at the side and trudge to the nearest sofa, plopping down in it. I place my bag beside me as I stare up to the ceiling.

I've cried much, probably enough. I don't have any tears left. Or I don't have a trigger to unleash more.

My neighbor was ogling at me when I pulled in and maybe other people behind me. I am not facing the world right now, I'm staying in here for as long as.

Thank God it's Saturday.

My phone rings annoyingly. With a frustrated groan I shove a hand in my bag and fish out my phone.

Hurtfully it's not Alex but I'm still relieved to see the caller.

I accept the call and place it to my ear.

"Keila. Have you seen the news?" Levi asks with a little caution in his voice. Probably thinking I'm oblivious to the news. How I wish he knew what's up right now.

I try. I try to hold in the tears in my voice but when I speak, it's there. The slight breaking of my voice and the disturbed breath "Yeah I have".

A pause.

"Are you alright?" He asks with concern now.

"No" I sob "I'm not".

"Keila? What's wrong? Where are you?".

"Home" I say and sniff.

"Hold up, I'm coming over with Chris and Eiko".

I nod continuously against my phone. I need them here so badly.

                                        &

My heart is so heavy.😫
Alelia is gone.