Honest Goodbye [COMPLETED] #Wattys2020

Chapter 13

Chapter 13

It was three years ago, I literally cried over an exam. I was losing hope, I've been trying to convince Mom that she should shift me to an another course. Nursing is hell. I needed support, and they were there from me, my friends were there from me. I've been feeling empty, they were always saying that I should accomplish being a Nurse. I was losing my hopes, they are taking me down, instead of pushing me upwards. They tried their very best helping me to finish this degree.

They were literally everywhere, people who showed me support were everywhere. But, something's missing, I still felt like there were blanks in me that needed to fill.

Then there was him, laughing.

I saw him flashed a smile to me, it struck the inner me, or maybe also the physical me. I don't know why it felt like those blanks were slowly getting filled.

He was a transfer student. There were rumors that he was suspended many times for smoking everywhere in the school area, that the administrators of his old school couldn't take his behavior anymore, that they had no choice but to kick him out.

It turned out that the rumors were true. I even asked him myself.

Well, I could ask him because he befriended me. His friends was the varsity guy and he was the only one in their group who was not part of the basketball team. He couldn't be part of it anymore, unless he will join next school year. I envied them, for the reason that they still could do extracurricular activities, when in fact, being a college student is a tough one. He took business ad major in marketing, he once story told me that he is the heir of their company so his Dad pushed him to take business ad.

One thing I really didn't like about him is his smoking habit. I really don't like smokers and he knows it himself. I was always telling him that, that's why I'm sure he is aware.

Third year college was nearing it ends, so does our friendship. He always asks me on text how did I do on our exam, if I already ate my dinner, he also added me on facebook. He showed me his intentions gradually. He deliberately gave me flowers, he knows tulips are my favorite flowers. He courted me by just being consistent, he didn't ask for my permission, he just did what he wanted to do. He even removed his habit, he's no longer smoking.

The time I finally decided that I also wanted to be with him, I told him we are fairly feeling the same. It was third year in college, we were making memories. By that time that he constantly showing me that he cares, saying that he loves me, giving me his handwritten poems every month, my blanks in me were filled, and I was unaware.

Now, I wish that I should've known that those blanks were wrongfully filled.

He made me fall in love with him, I know it's metaphorical, but sometimes I think it may be true that I really fell in love. Because if not, how did I become broken? I fell in love in a way it was not metaphorical. I just really fell.

"What the actual fuck," I blurted out unintentionally while staring at the trees we are passing by. "How could that be real?" words run out from my mouth again, unaware.

"Are you drunk?" I saw in my peripheral vision that Mat looked at me worriedly.

I looked at him, and said, "Why?" I smirk, our eyes met. I don't think I look okay right now. "Are you worried?"

He looked at the way again, siya ang nag-ddrive ngayon. Wala na rin naman akong angal dahil baka mabangga ko lang ang sasakyan dahil umiikot pa rin sa utak ko ang nakita ko kanina.

How unfair, he already kissed someone, when I am here, busying myself and not even had a time to make out.

I'm still watching him drive, when words just came out from my mouth, "Do you want to make out with me?" I asked Mat.

He looked shocked, but still managed to drive alright.

"Answer me," I chuckled. I think I'm already drunk. Ininom ko kasi ang beer na hawak kanina ni Mat bago kami tuluyang makalabas ng club. "Ayaw mo ba?"

"I'm taking you home, you're drunk." he seriously said and continued driving.

"Oh, okay." I said, and held the steering wheel and moved it to the right, and kicked the brake that made the car stop.

Mateus was silenced, and before things could sink in his head, I already kissed him torridly.

He just shockingly opened his mouth but he didn't kissed me back. I couldn't resist. I am still kissing him.

I stopped kissing him, but my hands are still touching the sides of his face, I said, "Kiss me back, Mat." My lips covered his, again, "Kiss me." I said while kissing him.

I felt my lips becoming warmer from his. He is kissing me back torridly, like I am kissing him. It was getting hotter, and our kiss is getting intense.

This has never happened to me for years, I miss this kind of kiss.

He held the back of my head and pushed it so I could kiss him hardly. This is beautiful. He's romantically kissing me.

It felt so good feeling warm again, after a long years.

My hands were travelling on his back. I could feel his hard muscles from my touch. He's flawless.

He could make me feel crazy just by making out with me.

His hands travelled from the back of my head to my spine. He pushed it that made us closer. "Mmm." I softly moaned.

We kissed, and I don't know how long it took. All I know is that, it was beautiful.

We gleefully smiled at each other after that long kiss.

"Wooh.." he wiped the beads of sweat dripping on his face. "It was so good," I saw him smile. "I'm sorry for being like that, it was unexpected." he said while looking at me and tapping his fingers on the steering wheel.

"Yeah," I chuckled, "Let's not talk about this anymore, it's getting kinda awkward."

"You're hundred percent right," he also chuckled and started to drive again. "I will drive you home." he said while looking at our way.

I just nodded not being sure if he saw me nod, but that's not important.

I momentarily forgot what I saw in the Club and my feelings are not that heavy anymore, though, I still feel something in my chest, that's okay. I already moved on, right?

He just took me and my car home. He said he's fine taking a grab.

Hindi ko siya iniwan sa labas ng gate at hinintay namin ng magkasama ang grab. We were holding each other's hand while waiting for kuya driver.

"This is a beautiful night," I said, and looked at him, our eyes met and we smiled at the same time. "Thank you."

"I agree," he replied and looked at the stars. I watched his jaw moved. "Thank you, also." he said smilingly.

He is really a warm person.