Sidereus

Chapter Three

"I can't Eleanor!" Sam releases a frustrated scream, spinning around on his feet. Halting in my tracks I suddenly become rooted to my spot in a tangle of guilt when Sam stresses erratically "Every time I see you... there is my best friend who my brother fell for." My chest tightening I stop myself from wandering closer to Sam when he takes another step away from me. Flinching at his aversion Sam ducks his gaze, unable to even look at me when he sadly admits "Never in my entire life did I notice Dean stare at any girl the way he looked at you. Not just attraction or admiration. Something I've never seen on his face before- like it was-"

"Love", I quietly finish when Sam chokes on his own words. My own eyes glistening with unshed tears, I watch Sam clenching his jaw to keep his own grief at bay. My heart swelling in my chest, I murmur loudly amongst the quiet "We fell in love."

Sorrowfully nodding Sam backs towards the kitchen door "And that's what I need space from... because that is all I see when I look at you El." When Sam yanks open the door a stray tear falls down my cheek with the creak of the door. Yet Sam hesitates in the thresh hold. Sparing me a heartbroken glance over his shoulder, Sam's voice breaks when he sombrely murmurs "I love you. I'm sorry. But I need this."

With the click of the kitchen door behind Sam my hand snaps up to muffle the broken sob that escapes my clenched jaw. It's the only sound amongst the silence and I suddenly become aware of how alone I truly am. I lost Dean, I lost Katie and now Sam can't even stand to look at me. I lost them all. Resting my back against the wall I slide down the peeling panel. Snaking my arms around myself I grip myself tightly. With Bobby spending his days in a drunken haze I'm all I have now. It's just me.

But there's got to be a way to bring Dean back. I lost all hope on bringing back Katie years ago. She's not in Hell but Dean is. There's always a loophole. A door can serve as an entrance and an exit- so to speak. For that reason I wipe my tears and grit my jaw in a pathetic attempt to cease my crying. Fuelled with determination I pick myself off the dirty wooden floor. If I bring Dean back I'll get Sam and Bobby back too. Everything will be fine once I break Dean from Hell. If I get him back I can get everyone back- I have to. I don't have anyone else.

Present Day.
Sat around the coffee table within the motel room with a casing of beer I swig back a large portion of mine. Can you blame me? After Dean getting pulled back topside without any clue as to who could've pumped that much juice I need something to take away the edge. Three gulps in and I sense the stress of today melting away with the bitter fizz. "So what were you doing here if you weren't digging me outta my grave?" Dean asks as I shuffle back on the carpet, my arm flung over his thigh as Dean sinks on the cheap couch behind me.

"Well once I figured out I couldn't save you I started hunting down Lilith to get payback", Sam sits backward on a dining chair, beer dangling over the backrest.

"All by yourself?" Scoffing accusingly from the other end of the sofa, Bobby huffs "Who do you think you are? Your old man?"

With a sheepish look to Bobby as something catches my eye, Sam apologises "I'm sorry Bobby. I should've called. I was pretty messed up-"

"Oh yeah", I stretch to grab the flowery pink lace bra from underneath the coffee table near my feet. Stretching the straps playfully between my thumbs, I mention cynically "I really feel your pain."

An amused smirk finally tugs on Sam's lips when I snap the straps and shoot the bra towards him, Sam swatting it away with the large hand not holding his beer. "Anyways I was tailing some Demon's in Tennessee" Sam redirects our conversation "And out of nowhere they took a hard left. Booked it up here."

"When?"

"Yesterday morning", Sam answers Dean with a shrug.

"When I busted out", Dean hums thoughtfully above me.