Mafia | Renhyuck

Part 39: Unconfessed Feelings

Mark pulled fuzzy socks on to his cold feet and crossed his legs when he was done, slumping his shoulders. His fingers lightly traced against the wooden floor of his room.

If he was still at home, his parents would probably have smacked his back with a wooden spoon and tell him to straighten up. Good sons that are going to inherit the family business should have good posture.

Mark grimaced at the thought of what his parents would have said, their voices constantly plagued his dreams and thoughts. He tugged at the bottom of his t-shirt and chewed at his lip. A nervous tic that he had picked up while living in that suffocating and abusive household. If he couldn't control his life, he would control what he could. For him, that would have been chewing at his lips or picking at his fingers. Not the greatest coping mechanisms. 

He had finally come to terms that it was, in fact, an abusive household. That parents didn't beat their kids senseless and berate them for every action that they ever did. He just assumed that every parent was strict and harsh on their kids, which they were...to an extent. 

He couldn't thank Renjun enough for what he had done for him. Taking him out of that house and throwing him into a life that made Mark live on the edges on his toes. But in a good way. Mark felt like he was finally living. That he wasn't living day to day doing the minimum he could to get by, but finally thinking about the future, about his new family that he would die to protect. 

And how did Mark repay him? 

By throwing him into a trap where he was kidnapped, tortured, and experienced abuse that was probably a lot worse than what Mark had gone through.

Mark rubbed the back of his head, guilt settling in his stomach like it always did when he looked at the younger boy. He was surprised none of the other members blamed him, although he was sure they did when he wasn't around. Anxiety clawed at his gut as he bit around the edges of his fingernails. After all the love and friendship that Renjun had given him, and still gave him, he couldn't help but punish himself for hurting the other boy.

But Mark didn't want friendship.

Mark let out a frustrated and disbelieving sigh, leaning back on his hands as he sat on the floor of his room. He couldn't believe himself. He was Donghyuck's best friend for God's sake.

"Hey, Mark are you getting your ass up?" Jaemin poked his head through Mark's doorway and raised his eyebrows at the older who was sitting on the floor. "Donghyuck will seriously kick your ass if you're not in the living room in the next 20 seconds." Speaking of the devil. 

"Yeah, yeah," Mark waved his hand and let out another sigh, preparing himself to stand up, "I'll be there in a second." Jaemin gave a nod before disappearing, his running footsteps slowly fading as he jogged down the hallway.

Mark slowly got to his feet, his back cracking in the process and he winced at the loud noise. He wasn't particularly fond of loud noises. His oversized pajama pants pooled around his covered feet as he walked out of his room, turning to his right to walk down the hallway. He took his time walking down the hallway, pausing when he passed both Renjun and Donghyuck's doors. That guilt creeping up as he glanced at Renjun's door and then Donghyuck's.

He decided to shove down those feelings for another time and continued, making his way down the rest of the hallway and then the staircase. His feet stopped moving forward as he walked down the last step onto the bare floor, his eyes focused on the scene in front of him. 

He was met with lots of yelling as well as blankets and pillows flying as they were thrown from person to person. Jisung and Chenle were already bundled up on one of the loveseats. Jeno was nowhere to be seen but Jaemin was setting up a pile of blankets on the floor for him to lay on, most likely Jeno too. This left the couch where Renjun and Donghyuck were currently brutally beating each other with pillows.