Boss Bitch || Mafia!Larry || 1 ||

|| 23 ||

 "What was it like? Being with Jackson?", Harry asked cautiously as he caught up with Louis.

"You don't have to answer, I just wanted to ask because he's a real asshole"

"Welcome to the world of men I am attracted to", was Louis' reply.

"You're cliché"

Louis grinned, gave Harry a look before he looked straight ahead again.

"I know it's not like me to like this because I really want to be treated differently. But it wasn't like Jackson always treated me like shit. He really had -"

"Another side, when you were alone, only when others were around, he was so different and meaner", Harry said the words he had heard so often. Louis laughed, pushed him a little with his shoulder against the taller one.

"Yes, that's right, you got it. He was really different with me. Sometimes even when others were around. He changed quite a bit over the year, he's just an ass now. He was then, but different. At least now he shows it more. Actually great"

"Yeah, great!"

"At least he treated me well enough to make me want to marry him and spend the rest of my life with him. No one had ever done that before, so he didn't just lull me. I could think a little. At least partly"

"But he was still Jackson?! Don't get me wrong, but he's just..."

Harry didn't know how to put it, but Jackson didn't seem to be of the character that suited Louis at all. Louis laughed slightly.

"I know, but maybe I liked that"

"Being treated like shit?"

"Disgusting, right? But like I said, it wasn't always that way, or I never would have found him attractive. He was still doing what I said"

Harry smiled at Louis' tone of voice. Like it could be any other way and Louis wouldn't set the tone. They got into the elevator and Louis pushed a button.

"Which I understand even less", said Louis after a brief silence.

"I don't understand a lot of what I liked about him, but... why I let him seeing me the way he did somehow... I don't know, I was probably too fond of him by the time I noticed and then ignored it"

"What do you mean?"

Louis was silent again, only looked at the slightly reflective elevator doors.

"I don't know how to say this, Jackson never saw me as... as a man, you know? I feel like he could never be with a man who acts like an 'average' man, you know? It's not about what he's into, it's just... I don't know, he's gotta be this great, strong man, and if he's got a man for a partner, then he's the woman's role and that's it. He's never seen me as a man, he's seen me as a womanlike, little feminine boy, I don't know what. A lot of people have trouble seeing me as a man, God free these people from their intolerant brains, but to let my partner do that... that's just disgusting.

Harry nodded understandingly. Louis must have had trouble with that. Especially in the beginning. Getting respect, being seen as a man. Many still thought manliness belonged to a real man and this included a certain look, behaviour and appearance. Bullshit.

"It's a good thing you know you don't want to be seen and treated like that"

Louis was silent, just nodded.

"Although I feel that every man has problems with that"

"You don't, do you? And you are a man"