you're all i want

ix

those thoughts quickly leave louis' mind when he thinks about harry. if he never auditioned for the x factor, he wouldn't have ended up with harry. he makes everything worth it. all that he misses when he's on tour or fighting with management doesn't matter because at the end of the day, he gets to go to bed with the most caring, supportive, and kind-souled person he has ever met.

as louis walks to the living room with his mum, he spots a picture hanging on the wall. it's the photo that jay so excitedly took on the day the band was formed. he pauses for a moment to gaze at it. all five of them looked so young and full of life, and had some pretty bad haircuts. their eyes were gleaming with excitement and hope for their future. now when louis sees photos of the band, he sees dull, tired eyes attached to only four young men who are stuck trying to fake their happiness for the world. it's crazy to think that the first picture was not even five years ago.

when jay notices he stopped to look at the photo, she gently puts her hand on his back. "we are all so proud of you, you know that right? no matter what happens. we've believed in you since day one. you have always made me so proud to be your mother."

louis' eyes break away from the photo and look back to his mum. "thank you," he says, unsure of how to express the extent of his gratitude.

louis finally enters the living room, where he is nearly tackled to the ground by lottie and fizzy. he tightly hugs them back, so glad to be back with his sisters. once they separate, louis hugs phoebe and daisy. "you have grown so much! i've missed you!" he exclaims, ruffling daisy's hair.

after his greetings to the girls, he finally gets to head over to see his youngest siblings, doris and ernest, who are busy playing with some toys on the ground. he gasps when he sees them. "what did you do to my babies?" he asks his mum. "they're huge! these aren't my ernest and doris!"

he scoops them both into his arms and hugs them. they're over a year old now, and it breaks louis' heart that he's so rarely able to see them. he was always such a huge part of his other siblings' lives, and it upsets him that the twins probably barely recognize him. he reluctantly lets them out of his hug. he wishes he could hold on to their childhood innocence and be able to take care of them and protect them, like a good big brother.

"why don't we all go out to the garden for a while before lunch?" jay suggests. "dan will be home in a couple hours."

louis picks up doris while jay carries ernest, and the large family makes their way outside. both sets of twins head off to play, while louis, jay, lottie, and fizzy take a seat at their outdoor table.

"it's been too long since we've seen you, lou. how's tour?" lottie asks.

"busy," louis responds. "we had to make a lot of changes to keep the harmonies and everything sounding right without zayn and sometimes it's easy to forget that my part in a song changed."

"have you spoken to him?" jay wonders. "how is he doing?"

louis shrugs. "i talked to him like a week ago. he hasn't really been responding to any of our texts. i think he needs some space right now. it's a lot to get adjusted to."

"such a shame," jay frowns. "you two were always so close."

"oh well," louis says nonchalantly, trying to mask how much the lack of communication with zayn was actually hurting him. "it is what it is. it's what's best for him."

"what about harry?" fizzy asks. "how is he doing?"

a wide smile crosses louis' face. "he's doing good. he misses you all. he wants to call later tonight to say hi to everyone."

jay's face lights up. "oh, that would be wonderful!" she exclaims. "he's a part of this family. we would love to speak to him."

one thing that louis is so ridiculously thankful for is how supportive his family is. harry means the world to him. the fact that his family has so openly accepted him as one of them means so much to louis.