you're all i want

xxxvi

january 21, 2016. california.

louis sits in the hospital waiting room alongside an official for modest!. they are in a private section of the hospital, where they will not get bombarded by paparazzi, so that briana will be able to give birth in peace. today is finally the day. in just a few hours when the photos are finally posted louis will finally start to be seen as a father to the public. this is the day that louis has been dreading for so many months, and so far, it is just as bad as he was expecting it to be.

he and harry have been in california for about a week. they knew briana was very close to her due date, but of course, you never know when someone is going to go into labor until it happens. louis hated having to leave clifford in england, even though eleanor was ecstatic to get to spend time with him. he feels like he is stuck abandoning his puppy, and he hates it. clifford can't understand why he had to leave and he doesn't want to break the poor dog's trust so soon.

nearly eight hours ago, louis was woken, phone ringing with the call that informed him that briana was going into labor. he was told he has to be at the hospital as soon as possible and that he had to come alone. it goes without saying that harry would not be allowed to join him. the man who they are trying to erase all rumors of a relationship with going with louis for the birth of his child. how would that look to the public?

thankfully, this hospital is secluded enough that louis can stay outside while briana gives birth. if there were press around, they would probably question why he isn't in the room where his first child is being born. instead, briana's boyfriend is in with her and louis can stay outside until it's time to take photos.

as he sits, waiting, louis can not fathom how far this has gone. rumors are one thing. something as extreme as faking a child is on a whole other level.

this kid doesn't deserve the life they are being born into. did anyone ever think about how this would affect them? everyone thinking their father is some celebrity who is never around. louis hates this role that has already been handed to this child. what type of person creates such a huge conspiracy, that they thrust such an innocent being into a world like this?

when louis actually has kids, he has decided that he he is going to be the best dad in the world. he and harry will be an unstoppable force that will make sure their child will never forget how loved they are. louis has a lot of experience with kids and he loves them a lot. he is probably as prepared as anyone is to become a father. he knows how to care for them and how to keep them happy. he will do anything he can to keep the child full of love and joy. he will protect them from the cruel world and teach them that who they are is perfect and they never have to change for anyone.

even though this kid is not actually his, the media is going to think he's a terrible dad. he's going to rarely be around the kid and is never going to have that close relationship with this child that he would if they were his. everyone knows that he and briana are not publicly together anymore, but that doesn't mean it's okay for louis to hardly acknowledge that this child exists. he is going to be viewed as this terrible, absent, neglectful father, a label he would never want placed on himself. that couldn't be farther from the truth, but of course, the public can never know that.

after hours and hours of waiting, a nurse finally steps out of briana's room with a bright smile on her face. "i think you will both be happy to hear that ms. jungwirth has given birth to a healthy and beautiful little boy!" she exclaims.

all of the dread that has been building up in louis' gut all morning suddenly hits him like a train. this is it. management has actually done this.

the official from management jumps to her feet. "excellent. can we go in for our photos now?" she clearly wants to get out of the hospital as quickly as possible. of course she doesn't care about the child, or any of their personal lives. all she cares about is the hefty paycheck she will be receiving.