Replay

Chapter Thirty Seven; Awkward Repeat of A First Date

**Carter's P.O.V.**

I was so nervous by the time Brantley showed up that I thought I was going to be sick. The whole ride to the resturant was silent and not a comfortable one either. I could tell Brantley was nervous about something too which just shook my nerves up even more. So much for a perfect repeat first date, this night is going to be terrible.

"How many?" The hostess asked, when did we walk inside? I really need to be paying attention to what's going on.

"Two." Brantley said.

The hostess nodded and led us to a booth in the back of the room, I'm sure she recognized Brantley and that's why she did it, "Here are your menus, your server will be with you shortly." She said before walking away.

I was looking at my menu when Brantley took it out of my hands, "What wrong?" He asked.

I didn't know what to say, "Uhm, nothing." I said.

Brantley sighed, "I know something is up, Angel. You haven't said but two words to me this entire time." Brantley said.

"You haven't talked to me either." I threw back.

Brantley sighed again, "What in the hell are we doing? We obviously can't date because something always screws it up." Brantley said.

I felt a twing in my chest, ouch, those words hurt, "Then why the hell did you bring me here if "something always screws it up" it was your idea to go on this date." I said trying not to show that I was hurt by his words.

"Because I love you and I want this whole thing to work out but nothing goes right between us. The littlest things throw us off on a totally different course." Brantley said and I could tell he was aggravated.

"That's not my fault. I was perfectly content until you snatched my menu out of my hands and started questioning me." I said.

"You thought I was questioning you? I just wanted to know what the hell was wrong with you. You weren't talking to me and I thought something was wrong. My bad for trying to show that I care." Brantley said.

"That's questioning me, I thought something was wrong with you too but I trusted you enough to know you'd tell me whatever it is when you were ready." I said.

Brantley ran his hand over his head, "Do you want to have kids?" Brantley asked out of the blue.

I didn't know if he wanted a serious answer of what he was looking for here, "I, I don't know. Why are you asking me that?" I asked.

"Don't lie to me, Carter. I saw you looking at that picture of a baby on twitter and I saw what you did when you saw it. I know you want to have a kid but I don't want to have a kid right now. I want to be selfish and keep you for my own." Brantley said.

I was at a loss for words so I just got up and went to the bathroom. I had nothing to say to Brantley anymore, at least not any words that would mean anything. I know that all he wants is me to himself and he can't have that forever. I'm not his property I'm my own person and I can make my own decisions. Maybe Brantley and me dating wasn't a good idea, we should have just stayed friends and our lives would be simple. They wouldn't be so complicated all the time and we wouldn't fight over the little things. I knew what had to happen and it was going to happen tonight. I had to tell Brantley that this just isn't going to work. I can't deal with all these fights about absolutely nothing. I walked out of the bathroom and Brantley was leaning against the wall waiting for me.

"Angel, I'm sorry, I didn't want to lie to you and-" I cut Brantley off.

"Let's just leave. I don't want to be here anymore." I said walking past him. 

I heard Brantley sigh and I knew he was behind me. I walked out to the parking lot, got in the truck, waited for Brantley, and turned the radio up real loud because I didn't want to hear anything he had to say to me. When we got back to the hotel the only reason I waited for him was because he had the room key and I didn't. When we got back to the room I grabbed my pajamas and went right into the bathroom. I sighed and slid down the door I could hear Brantley trying to quietly cuss himself but I couldn't make out what he was saying. I took my heels off and took my dress off before I turned the water to the shower on, I let it run warm before I stepped in and just let the water wash away my stress.

Did Brantley really mean that he didn't want to be with me? I thought Brantley was better than that, I thought he carried more than that. Jack and Diane are right, all he does is play with my heart and then crush it. He's hurt me so much in the little amount of time that we have been together. I'm wasting my time trying to make him and I work. I don't know how either of us thought this could work we know to much about each other for anything to work between us. I got so fustrated that I started hitting the wall of the shower and tears started rolling down my face. I hit the wall one last time and just sat where I was, I heard the bathroom door open, great I forgot to lock it.

"You okay, Angel?" I heard Brantley's voice ask.

I shook my head but he couldn't see me, "Go away, Brantley." I said my voice cracking.

I heard the door close and figured Brantley was gone but I was wrong, "I didn't mean what I said. I want to be with you more than anything." Brantley said.

That only made me cry more because I feel like he's lying to me, "You're lying." I said.

"No, I'm not lying. You're my world, Carter. I love you to the moon and back. I would be crushed if you walked out of my life again." Brantley said.

I didn't say anything because I knew he would hear the hurt in my voice now. I can't keep doing this going back and forth with Brantley isn't what I want. I want someone who will try to stop us from fighting not start the fights and then change their mind.

"Carter." I heard Brantley say with a hint of sadness to his voice.

I still remained quiet not wanting to talk.

"I'm such a f**kin idiot." I heard Brantley say and then slam the counter top.

I flinched and let out a small yell, this side of Brantley always scares me more than anything. I buired my head in my arms to drown out his sounds. I felt the breeze from the shower curtain being ripped open and I looked at Brantley in shock.

"What the hell are you doing!? I'm naked!" I yelled.

Brantley turned the water off and picked my naked body up off the floor of the shower. I was scared, upset, and pissed off all at the same time, "Brantley Keith Gilbert, put me the hell down right now." I said trying to hide my scared tone.

"I'm not going to hurt you. I just want you to see that I want to be with you forever. I don't want to lose you, Carter." Brantley said putting me down on the bed.

"Brantley, I can't you know that." I said knowing what he meant.

Brantley sighed, "Yes you can. You're just scared to and I get that. I do but you know I'm not going to hurt you. I'm not other guys, Angel. I'm your best friend, your body guard, the guy who just wants to show you that I love you." Brantley said putting a hand on each side of my face so I would have to look at him.

"I lose my parents if I do this. You don't understand." I said trying not to cry anymore.

"You won't lose anything. You're parents are looking out for you all the time even if you do this they'll still look out for you. I know you want to and you know that I want to." Brantley said and he's right I do want to. I want to show him that I love him but I don't want to hurt my parents.

I shook my head, "I can't. You're right though I do want to. I just can't hurt them, Brantley." I said.

Brantley leaned down and kissed my lips, "You won't hurt them. They'll understand. I promise Carter and even if we don't I'll still love you no matter what." Brantley said when he pulled away from the kiss and rested his forhead on mine.

I looked away from Brantley's gaze because I couldn't take it anymore, I want to do what's right and honor my parents but I want Brantley like that. I looked back at Brantley and let my arms snake around the back of his neck as pressed my lips to his.

"I'm willing to risk it for you." I whispered when I pulled out of the kiss.