In the Absence of a Good Life

(23) Pecuniary Advantage

One Half of the Comedy Duo (A.K.A The Sarcastic One - Shelly)

'Bingo.' I said as I looked at the hundreds of green notes lying underneath the mattress. 

On one note, I was angry that Gus had the nerve to hide his dirty money under where I slept, in my room. Though on the other hand, I was rejoicing that he'd made it so easy to find. All I had to do was think about the most obvious hiding place. It was simple really.

I picked up the money after jamming my door shut with the chair in the corner. I counted out £10,000 (Terrance had told me that Jimmy was struggling to pay back this much when we were waiting in the hospital) and placed the excess back under the pillow.

I thought about keeping some of the money, but I didn't want to risk being found out. I'd taken a significant amount already, and I'd be lucky if Gus didn't notice. Also, I had enough money to buy the things that I needed, I didn't actually NEED anymore. I didn't possess the greed that my brother so obviously had.

I stuffed the wad of money into a handbag and brushed myself down so I didn't look like I'd been sneaking around in the places that I shouldn't be in. I unwedged the chair from the door and stepped outside of my room.

I walked down to the family lounge and announced that I was leaving for a while, and that I'd be back shortly. I met Gus' eye and smiled. It was as if nothing had happened. I'd gotten away with it! He didn't know! 

I resisted the urge to jump up and down and flaunt my success in front of Gus. It wouldn't do me any favours. I then went out of the back door and walked to the bus station. I couldn't wait to show Terrance what I'd done. Try telling me I set you up NOW you big buffoon! 

The Partner in Crime (A.K.A - The Best Mate - Terrance)

We arrived home from school as usual, we walked, and we were so tired that Jimmy nearly collapsed just inside the door.

'Hold on bud'.' I said, as I supported him into the lounge. I dropped him onto the sofa, where he groaned in pain.

'Damn sofa.' He mumbled.

I moved his feet as I went to sit down. Over the past three to four days, neither of us had come any closer to finding a way to pay Gus back. I'd encouraged Jimmy to get a job and we'd both been working extra shifts. We couldn't continue living like this, it was wearing us out. Jimmy's combined income with mine, wasn't nearly enough to pay off the loan. Not before the end of the next three days.

There was only one option left.

We'd have to leave. Run away and never come back. We'd have to keep moving, never stopping for more than a month. It would be too risky to stay any longer than that. I knew Gus had men everywhere.

I hadn't known it before, but when I had spoken to my fellow doormen, I found out that he was infamous in almost every hell hole in the country.

Jimmy and I didn't have enough money to leave the country, and we didn't have enough money to live in anywhere else but a hell hole. What else was there to do?

Jimmy had ruined my life, he'd ruined his own. We were damned, doomed, unfortunate souls, with no hope left in this life. It was only now that Jimmy had begun to see the errors of his ways. Only now, when all hope was lost.

Why?

What had we done to deserve this?

Was there no mercy left in the world?

It just wasn't fair, but what else could we do? I turned to Jimmy. We'd discussed our options. I was trying to get him onto the straight and narrow, so the casino was out. We couldn't borrow more money because we'd just dig a deeper hole for ourselves. He knew that all we could do was run.

'It's time.' I said. He knew full well what I meant. We had to get far enough away from here, that when they came to kill him, we'd be long gone from this place.

'Terrance?' He asked me.

'Yeah.'

'Thanks mate.' He said pathetically. 'I'm sorry to put you through this, thanks for sticking by me.'

I laughed, but it wasn't a happy laugh, it was a laugh that recognized what we were about to go through, the hopelessness that fast approached. 'Yeah, I know...I know.'

We sat in silence for a few minutes before I stood up to get the suitcases out of the store cupboard under the stairs. They'd never been used before. I guess there was a first time for everything.

I chucked one over to Jimmy and we both ascended the stairs to pack our things. This was it. I was finally acknowledging what was happening. I would never be able to relax again. I'd never have a place to call home, a place to feel safe. A thought of selflessness overcame me, but I brushed it away. I wouldn't leave him. No way would I let him go alone. The world was a cruel place that dragged the sanest person into the pits of insanity. Jimmy wasn't exactly sane. He was hanging on at the edges of reality, one bad thing would send him flying off into the abyss. I had to be there to stop that.