The High School Escapades!

What The Fuck?!

BANG!

Smoke filled the room. Coughing, Cindy growled. "What the fuck just happened?!"

"Calm your tits, bitch," Tiffany, sitting next to her, said in her usual, monotone voice. "It's just that Hispanic chick throwing smoke bombs and shit."

"That stupid bitch! Does she want to get sent to the principal's office?"

A teacher lectured Carla on don't throw smoke bombs or some bullshit and dragged her off, presumably to the principal's office. Penny came along too, for emotional support or some bullshit.

Whatever. She had a boyfriend to find. She looked around the cafeteria, to no avail.

felix

feeeeeliiiiiix

FELIX!

What on Earth do you want, woman?

Ugh. He was being so rude.

Felix Huxley I know you're in here

Where the fuck are you?

Language.

Where are you?!

I'm not ready to deal with you right now, Cindy.

Please leave me alone.

The fucking nerve.

Felix

Fucking

Huxley

We need to talk. Get your millionaire ass over here.

Now.

_______________________________________

Well that wasn't good.

What was even worse was that there was no way in Hell The Order would let Felix obey her.

And what was perhaps worst of all was that Ozzy was looking over his shoulder.

"Hm."

"Hm?"

"We need to go."

Grabbing Felix's wrist, Ozzy snuck out of the cafeteria and into the bathroom.

"Why the hell are we here?"

"You need more lessons. Cindy's on your case, which means you need to be able to avoid her. Her and Buggs."

Felix did a double-take. "Wait, 'and Buggs?'"

"Yeah," Ozzy started to explain, washing his hands for the second time since they've walked in. "She's getting him to help her by promising him sex, but she's totally lying. I mean, why would she ever wanna bang Buggs? She's already got you. You're way hotter than Buggs."

Huh. That was useful information. Felix thought for a moment about what that could mean for him, and- hold on, what was that? "Wait, what?"

"She's lying to Buggs to get him to do her bidding."

Not what he was referring to, but sure.

"The point is," continued Ozzy, trying to decide whether to dry his hands with the air dryer or the paper towels, eventually opting for both, "you better prepare to deal with her."

"I thought you said I needed more lessons?"

"Yeah, and then I realized I had no idea how the fuck to avoid Cindy getting suspicious. It's actually probably best to just go along with what she says for now."

God fucking damn it.

"Ozzy, you of all people should know by now that going along with what Cindy says is the last thing I want to do! Do you have any idea how fucking awful it is?!"

In case you hadn't noticed by now, Felix does not swear often. Because of that, The Order has made a system where they can gauge just how big an emergency something is by the type of language he uses.

So that "fuck" was a big red flag.

Ozzy flinched. "Jeez, no need to shoot the messenger. I know this must totally suck, but it's really all we can do! If she gets too suspicious, all our plans are ruined!"

Alright then.

That was rational. That was reasonable. That was logical. Felix could deal with that.

Maybe it was time to pay a visit to the bitch in sheep's clothing.