I'm going slightly mad // Hardzello

Chapter 62

The next day Gwil is awoken by someone shifting in his arms. Once he opens his eyes, memories from the night before come rushing back. His two best friends are still curled up in his chest. Their intertwined fingers rest lazily on Gwil's stomach. Joe is already awake and stares at Ben. Gwil carefully taps on Joe's shoulder. Which makes the later jump in his arms. It is until their eyes meet that Joe relaxes in Gwil's arms.
"Goodmorning." Joe whispers.
"Morning." Gwil whispers back. He immediately feels Ben stir under his other arm. As soon as Ben opens his eyes he smiles at Joe before looking up at Gwil. He looks confused for a second before seeming to remember what happened.
"Morning." His voice almost sounds like he is growling so low.
"Goodmorning. I will wait in the living room so the two of you can euhm talk or something." Gwil moves from under the two. Without saying anything he walks out of the room. The door closes silently. Within seconds Joe moves so he can lay in Ben's arms.

"Goodmorning, love." Ben whispers directly into Joe's ear.
"Goodmorning Benny." Joe nuzzles his face into Ben's chest.
"Do you want to talk about last night?" Ben asks while he rubs his hand over Joe's back.
"Yes, well, maybe not now. Is it okay with you to wait until Gwil is gone?" Joe says before looking up at Ben. He looks him in the eye so he can make sure that Ben is telling the truth.
"Whatever you want. I didn't want you to feel like I was running away from it." Ben says before planting a kiss on Joe's forehead.
"Thanks. Oh and thank you for helping Gwil like that last night. That was really sweet of you." Joe says. Ben smiles down at him. Joe is curled up in his arms. Without being able to do anything against it his heart starts to beat faster. He can feel the butterflies flying through his stomach the longer he stares at him.
"I know we have to get up, but I don't want to." Joe says before groaning into Ben's chest slightly. Ben lets his hands run over Joe's back before carefully wrapping his arms around Joe. He moves himself to the side of the bed so he can stand up. With Joe in his arms, he walks over to the living room. Joe starts giggling loudly once Ben starts to walk. Gwil looks up from his phone once he sees the two coming into the living room. He gives them a sad smile before looking back at his phone.

"If you sit here with Gwil. I will make us some breakfast. What would you like to eat Gwil?" For the last part of the sentence, Ben moves his gaze from Joe towards Gwil.
"Just whatever the two of you are having. I am already glad that I can stay here." Gwil says while looking up from his phone again. He smiles at Ben who soon bends down to whisper in Joe's ear.
"Same calories as yesterday? Or do you want me to eat more?" He whispers so quietly that Joe has difficulties making out the right words.
"Yesterday at least, but if you want to eat more you can. You're still at the bare minimum." Joe whispers quietly. Gwil had looked up from his phone, but as soon as he notices how quietly they talk on purpose he looked down once again. He drowns in the articles he is reading.

"Did you sleep the whole night after we all crammed in one bed?" Joe asks to distract Gwil from whatever he is reading.
"Yeah, thanks for laying with me. I really needed that." Gwil tries his best to smile. For a second Joe thinks it is real until he sees the sad look in his eyes.
"Come here." Joe pets down onto the spot on the couch next to him. Gwil looks from Joe's hand to his face before quietly standing up. He sits down exactly where Joe patted his hand. The latter immediately pushes Gwil into his chest. He can feel Gwil's body shiver a little.
"You're okay. I've got you." Joe looks up when Ben walks into the room. He nods towards Gwil as he hopes that Ben gets his hint. Which he does within a second. Ben places the tray on the table before sitting down on the other side next to Gwil. He places his hand on Gwil's knee to grab his attention.
"Talk to us." Ben almost whispers, but his voice is soothing enough for Gwil to break.
"I'm just scared. I don't want to give up my relationship with Eve. We have been together for almost eight years now. On the other side, I can't watch her get hurt or even worse." Gwil's voice gets quieter with the second.
"I know it's difficult, but we don't even know if Paul is going to do anything. What are the chances that he will still know who you are? And if he does, how is he going to find you and Eve?" Ben says. He can see both Gwil and Joe cringe at Paul's name.
"They're small. You're right. Maybe I should stay with her." Gwil mumbles while toying with the hem of his shirt.
"I do think that you have to tell her what is going on. She deserves to know." Joe says while rubbing his hand over Gwil's arm.
"I know. I think I'll go home after breakfast." They all sit up to grab the plates standing on the tray. Joe looks quickly at Ben's plate and can't help but smile. Yesterday he only ate one piece of toast. Now he also grabbed a bowl of yoghurt. From the corners of his eyes, Ben sees the huge smile on Joe's face. He can't help but get happy. It hasn't been an easy journey. He is almost there, but sometimes deep in himself, he feels like giving up again. When he sees the happiness in Joe's eyes as soon as he has a small victory and knows better than to give up.

Gwil left them after giving a big both a big hug. While Ben hopped in the shower, Joe cleaned the dishes. As soon as he was done with the dishes he sat down on the couch waiting for Ben to finish showering. He played a game on his phone until he heard their bedroom door open. Ben walks in and soon sits down next to Joe. He closes his eyes for a few seconds while taking a deep breath.
"You know you can tell me everything, right?" Joe says while intertwining his fingers with Ben.
"I know, but that doesn't mean that it isn't hard." Ben mumbles.

*********
Hey lovies,

Merry Christmas y'all. I wish you all the best! Take good care of yourselves and others!

I love y'all!

Goodbye,

Xx Itsametaphorjoe