Sanders Sides Boiz Oneshots

Touch Starved [Moceit] (Teenagers AU)

"A whole lot of nothing. You should go away while you have the chance. I'm a bad guy."

Dee didn't want to hurt him. This guy was oddly cute and very sympathetic. He was a love bug and was often teased for hugging his friends and saying that he loves people a lot. Dee used to think it was disgusting, but he finally realized that it's just jealousy and wanting that. But that's not not what  true man would have, and Dee was raised to be a man... even if he wants a hug really really bad.

"You're not a bad guy. Just... misguided. You must be really lonely. I'm just here supervising over my cousins it's my brother Roman. I'll sit here next to you!"

Dee rose an eyebrow, looking naturally menacing, as Patton at down next to him with a cheery smile. Wait, something was suddenly wrong. Something was very wrong. His heart started beating kinda fast and his face flushed. He also felt something warm on his hand, which was resting on the bench. Dee looked over and saw Patton's hand over his own. Dee looked up at Patton, who realized what he was doing and instantly pulled back, apologizing to him for the awkwardness.

"Sorry! Sorry! Just a habit. Oopsie Daisy!"

He laughed a little bit after that. Dee lifted his hand and looked at it. It's cold now. Dee was confused. What just happened? Is that what it feels like when someonody touches you and it's not violent? Because Dee had never experienced that before. Dee set his hand back on the bench, low key wanting that to happen again because it felt nice... His face was still kind of hot but his heart wasn't nearly as deathly high on adrenaline. He looked back over at Patton, who was more sad and surprised than mortified. That's a first.

"Wait, has anyone ever held their hand over yours before?"

Dee rose an eyebrow again, shaking his head. Patton gasped aghast. Now he's mortified! Patton suddenly lifted Dee's hand and taken it entirely into his own. Dee felt his face heat up and his heart going doki doki DOKI with a Mega Doki at the end. Then Patton did this thing where his fingers went in between every single one of Dee's fingers and it felt really nice. Why didn't this feel so nice?

"You're touch starved! Nobody has ever held your hand, that's horrible? Have you ever been hugged before? Or... been told you're loved?"

Dee shook his head to both. Patton pouted and stood up, tugging with both hands on his arm to bring him up. Dee stumbled forward and off the bench. Suddenly he felt warmth all around him from the tiny boy his age, and felt his hand on his chest. He felt the tears behind his eyes, but this time there's no anger to mask it with. No. He cannot cry. He isn't allowed to cry. Men aren't allowed to cry. A Snape is not allowed to cry. But the warmth of Patton's embrace is beckoning him to vaunerability.

"Patton...? Why are you...?"

"Damien, I don't know you too well but I know that you are loved, someone loves you. Even if you don't think so, maybe if not now, somebody will love you very much and everything will be okay. I promise."

Dee sharply inhaled. He needs to push Patton off. This needs to stop. No. No crying. No feeling sad about himself. But the warmth feels so nice. Dee's arms were shaking as he brought Patton closer, doing the same thing he was doing to him. This is how hugging works... right? Dee felt his eyes start to sting and his heart was about to shift into maximum overdrive. Dee didn't know what to do, but for the first time in his life he felt... happy?

"Dee."

"Huh?"

"My name is Damien, but if I had any friends... I want to be called Dee."

That was super sad, but that's okay. He felt the tear finally slip out of the dam behind his eye. Patton squeezed him, laughing so that his breath could be felt on his chest. Is this what it felt like to be in an embrace? Is this what Love is? No wonder why his mom was so distraught whenever his dad died. It's because love felt so wonderful. Dee could get addicted to this just like he's addicted to the nicotine in this chewing tobacco.

"Okay, I'll call you Dee of you call me you're friend."

A friend? Dee had a friend now? Dee smiled for the first time in forever. He didn't care if his Mom was running up to him after catching him skipping his job and going to whip him for being a quote unquote faggot himself and for crying, but that's all okay because now he has a friend.

And later... a boyfriend. 

1619 Words

That ending was highkey dark I'm so sorry.

I CAN ONLY WRITE, LIKE, LESS THEN TEN FANFICS BEFORE I HAVE TO END THE BOOK.

AAAAAAAAA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

HELP MEEEEEEEEEE

~Eva