Just Dance /LanceXReader/ {Voltron Dance AU}

A/N [Im sorry guys]

Hey everyone I firstly want to apologize for leaving y'all in the dark. I want to explain to everyone what has been going on in my life.

First things first, I guess I have depression? I tend to get depressed a lot, and when I do it's not like a small depression it's a deep deep depression.

I've just gotten better with school, I've brought my grades up, yay...But and a big but. I'm loosing a lot of my friends.

For those of you who don't know I'm asexual, and that is considered to be part of the LGBTQ+ community. I had this..friend who I trusted, He is trans, pansexual. He was one of the first people I told, one of the first people I came out too. Because I thought he'd understand, being pansexual and all I thought he'd understand what it's like to have people say it's not a real thing.

Recently I over heard him talking to one of my friends. They were talking about everyone's sexuality, My friend said "Well Yeah Ceces asexual" and I overheard him say.."I don't really consider asexuals to be a part of the community at all"...I pushed it aside, but again recently. At snack he looked me right in the eye and said
"If you're asexual that's not a thing, you're not in the community stop trying to weasel your way In"

It broke my heart honestly, because I trusted him, I came out to him and he told people I was asexual I couldn't even come out myself, I'm not even proud anymore.

Besides him my suppose to be best friend is slowly replacing me with others. She invited them everywhere, she hangs out with them all the time, they tell each other secrets and I'm left behind.

I met this guy, in my opinion he was the sweetest thing ever, He made me happy to be who I was, and just over all happy Yeah. We talked like every day. Somehow he always made me feel better about my self, And whenever I talk to him I could feel myself just become happier. I forget about everything else.

But somewhere a long the lines I grew a terrible fear that I was a burden, and that I was just annoying him, that he was only talking to me out of pity or something. So I stopped texting him to see if he'd text me first. He didn't.

I was really scared, I went weeks not being able to be happy, every time I looked at my phone I would get scared and think of him, scared that he hates me, scared that he just wouldn't want to be friends anymore.

We are slowly talking again...But I'm still too scared to talk to him first, I don't want to loose another friend who's actually important to me.

For the past few months I've been in a depression. I realized that the guy I liked for five years isn't right for me, I realized I only liked him because I was scared if I didn't like him I would have no chance with anyone else. I might like this other guy but he might not like me as a friend anymore. I hate my art, I hate myself, I hate my body I hate my smile, the way I life, the way I do everything.

I'm not just saying this to get compliments or likes...I honestly...honest to God I can't find a way to like myself.

I've been putting off this book because I want to give you guys the best chapters I can give..But I can't do that if I constantly hate myself. Thank you all for being so patient...I wouldn't be surprised if I lost a couple followers or readers.

Just thank you for staying if you stayed...Your comments make me happy even if it's just for a few minutes. Thank you so so so much for 21K+ reads I remember sitting on my couch desperately waiting for my book to get over 10 reads. Thank you I really don't deserve this but thank you 💞🖤