chapter playlist ⏯
• mine right now - sigrid
• like someone in love - bruno major
• you and i - michael bublé
———
about a month later
gemma clark <<<
"Oh my God, you're pregnant."
I looked at Edith as she got up from her couch to get a drink of water. I wonder how that feels, to be so...undeniably pregnant. I mean, she's huge. There's a real-life, fully-functioning human being inside of her. That's insane.
"T-minus sixteen days," she said, taking a sip before going back to the couch. "I just want to get him or her out. I'm going to be pissed if I go past my due date."
I chuckled. "It's not easy, huh?"
She shook her head. "It's so not easy. But, I think it's a small price to pay for the greatest gift in the world, or whatever they call being a parent."
"Agreed. It'll all be worth it," I said with a smile. "What do you think it's gonna be? Boy or girl?"
She smiled. "My gut is saying it's a boy. I don't really care, though. I mean, having a little girl to dress up and take shopping would be a dream, but in the grand scheme of things, I think boys are a lot easier to deal with. I'm just thinking about break-ups and mean girls and all the things I've felt in my years as a girl. Not that boys have it easy, but...easier, I think."
"That's true. But I think you're meant to have a daughter. At least one," I told her, thinking of all the things she's done for me as a fellow girl. She's a pro at handling break-ups and giving advice and dealing with mean people. She'd be a great mother to a girl.
"Well, if we don't get one this time, we'll just keep trying till we do," she said with a smile, making me laugh a bit.
"How many do you think you'll have?" I asked.
She sighed. "I don't know. Brad and I hadn't even really decided when we found out I was pregnant. At least one, I guess," she said with a smile. "We were thinking somewhere in the three to four to five range."
"Five?" I asked incredulously. "Wow. I mean, good for you, but...really?"
All I could think about was giving birth five times, all the sleepless nights, the countless diapers, the teenage years, teaching five kids to drive, high school five times...the list goes on and on. I mean, I know it'd be fulfilling in the end, but jeez, that's a lot.
"Well, not five for sure," she replied. "I guess we'll see how it goes with the first one. But I'm not opposed to five. We've both always wanted a big family. You don't?"
I mean, I never had a big family. I liked my small family, but maybe the more family, the better? I don't know. I'd never given much thought to it; I always felt like it was the kind of thing that would just feel right when you got there. Plus, it depends on what the person you're with thinks. I don't think Shawn and I have ever discussed kids. It's always seemed too early in our relationship, but I wonder what he thinks. If he said he wanted five kids, I don't even know what I would say. I guess I'm not exactly opposed to it; I think I would decide after I had the first one. Maybe it's not that bad and I could handle it four more times. Plus, you have to be an expert on kids after having a couple, right?
"I don't know. Maybe. That just seems like a lot to handle," I said in reply.
"It definitely would be, but I'm up for a challenge," she said with a smile and shrug. In my head, a challenge is like, running a 5K. Or learning to speak German. Having five kids is way more than a challenge.
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heartbreak girl | s.m.
Fanfiction"i could pull the stars down from the sky and give them to you, and you would still find a reason to say no, wouldn't you, gemma? you would still fucking go choose him." i felt like the world was crashing down on me. the one person i was completely...
