The Good and the Bad Conflicts in My Life {On Hold}

Chapter 32

RECAP:

“Girls, girls, just relax, nobody is going to die any time soon on my watch,” my father says.

After he tells us that, we go silent.  Gabby and I just look at each other. I need to say something, I thought, there is something in my head that is just urging to come out that might shock everyone if I say it. What do I do? I have no idea what to do? I don’t want to say it, but then I don’t want to leave anything unsaid. Damn it, Ashley, don’t you see? You need to tell him or he won’t realize what to do when that time comes. You need to tell him, you need to tell him, YOU NEED TO FUCKIN’ TELL HIM. After that thought, I tell my dad the thing that I never thought would be possible for me to say to him.

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"Dad, don't you see, I can't relax right now, knowing that there is a psychotic mad man wanting to kidnap us, rape us, torture us, and eventually wanting to kill us at any moment," I tell him.

"Honey, calm down," my tells me.

"No, I can't calm down!" I yell, "I don't want to end up dead and that's for a fact, but if I am going to get captured by this bastard, then so be it. I just don't want anyone to be told that I just ran away and killed myself. I don't want to end up like Mom. I don't want everyone telling you guys a lie. I want the truth to be told, like the truth about Mom being killed and not just claiming to be a heart attack."

"Ashley, I—," my dad says, as he tries to explain something that he couldn't.

"No, just...just...just STAY AWAY FROM ME!" I yell at him, as I run up into my room, crying with an enormous amount of tears coming out of my eyes.

Just before I get into my room, I hear my dad say, "Ashley!"

And then I hear Gabby tell him, "No, Mr. Raymore, just let her go and cool off. She needs it. I think there are just too many things she's stressing about so, just sit down and relax for right now."

After that, I get into my room and shut the door behind me. I cry even more and even louder as I slide down the door, and on to the floor. As I did, I pull in my legs close to my face, wrap my arms around my legs, and put my face into my knees and cry. I was just letting my tears come out.

I thought, why did I say that to him? Did I really mean it? I hope I didn't hurt his feelings. I don't want to stay mad at him. I don't like being mad at him. I feel like I am being such a total mess. Everything is just finally taking a toll on me. I then hear a voice call my name. I lift my head up and saw something at the other end of my room. I froze; basically not knowing whether or not to stand up and go over there. It says my name again.

"Hello?" I ask,"who the hell is calling my name?"

"Ashley," the voice says, "it's your mother."

"No, no, no, no, no," I say to the voice, "it can't be."

"It's quite alright if you don't want to believe me, but you need to listen to what I have to say," the voice, who claims to be my mother, tells me.

"Okay, fine, I'll listen," I say.

"You need to be careful when Z, well Zane, comes and get you, because you won't have a great chance of getting out of his grip alive once he has you," the voice tells me, "and for Gabby, it will be the same idea. You need to look out for her and the same goes for her."

"How do you know that information?" I ask the voice, "and why are you telling me this?"

"Like I said before, I'm your mother, whether you believe me or not, and I have been listening and watching you ever since I died," the voice says, "and the reason why I am telling you this is, because I wasn't able to escape in time and I died for it, and the death of me seemed to look like a heart attack, but it wasn't."