Unwanted Seoulmate AMBW

Met my heart

" It's okay enjoy your food, she's pretty." I responded back.

I didn't know why I texted that, but before I realized it I had sent it. I didn't want to argue.

We parked, when we did he began to call me, as expected he began to ask where I was, he began to tell me he could explain. I didn't want to hear his explanation, because he'd prove me wrong of my accusation. Had I become manipulative just to avoid taking accountability for my attraction to Hae-ju.

Out of nowhere my door was opened. There, there stood Ju-won. " Why are you with her?!" He called out to Hae-ju as he directed me out the car.   

" Mom, please take her." He called out to the woman that followed after him.

" Is this Ae-ra?" The woman asked.

" No she's the one I met with to give you my letter, this is my girlfriend."

" you two go inside please." He directed.

Just as I thought.

The two stayed outside exchanging words. Till ju-won stormed inside and pulled me from my seat near his mother.

" You let him stay over?" Was his sentence of introduction. I looked up at him and hesitated to answer.

I lifted my head to speak but his anger shined through once more. Causing me to stay silent. " He was drunk I couldn't send him home." I answered finally.

" I've asked you not to drink with him! But you let him inside the house?" He asked.

" Nothing happened! My mom was present in the morning."

" Your mom being there this morning has nothing with him being there alone with you last night"

"— I know –." I answered.

" Do you need a raise that desperately? Are you trying to seduce him?" Ju-won added.

" Don't you know what people will call you? "

He couldn't cheat on me, he never usually got angry so I was grateful for him but he cut me deeply with those words so I backed away before he could give me an apology.

" Dalnim! Dalnim!" He yelled as I went back into the diner I bowed before his mom, grabbed my wallet and walked back to Hae-ju's car.

" if you get in that car it's over, Dalnim!" I heard him yell after the car.

I watched him from the side mirror, rushing his hand through his hair in annoyance.

" Ah, ah ha.." I chuckled tearfully silently in a storm of emotion" I'm a mess, I am huge mess." I mumbled.

I guess it was the weird feeling of having feelings for multiple persons, I only realized in that moment how much I actually enjoyed Ju-won, but how much I wished to escape with Hae-ju. The feeling only made me more uncomfortable, being that it was so unlike me.

" He already knew, I tried denying it but..." Hae-ju started.

" it's okay. Let's not talk about it anymore I want a drink." I said as I faced the outside world once more, the evening began dark, and my emotions became even more tangled.

" I think you should get some rest tonight... go to bed I know I should be happy but I'm not, that's not how it was suppose to happen."  He drove up to my house and parked, came  over to my door and helped me up the stairs.

He stood outside avoiding entrance, till my sister pulled him towards herself. " mom is at the market, then she'll be at the hospital let's have a drink, you sleep over anyways. " she winked. Before I could reject the idea the two already began drinking.

He ended up sleeping there that evening. I in my own mind rethinking my life and my romance. When I came here I promised myself that I would stray away from trouble but I placed myself right in the middle.

I blinked about but ended up shaking off my blanket and walked out into the cold.

After five minutes of walking, I felt the touch of something being rested onto my shoulder. I shook my head and began kicking, till I hit everything. Finally I looked down to see Hae-ju on the ground.

" omg!" Was all I could say as I bend down to help him up.

" I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I seemed to beg. He sat on the ground and continued to chuckle.

" it's okay, but I think we should just keep walking, you could've asked, I would've come out with you." He offered. I nodded my head in awareness.

" I know." Was all I could say.

At a moment I ran away from him and hid. Like a child, I really didn't understand why I was acting so outside myself.

While he continued to walk across the street looking for me. I swatted in the bushes, towards the swing set.

Ae-ra it seemed was talking to someone... from my angle I only saw their side views.

" My father wouldn't ever just freely approve of her, I tried hiding her for her own good, but she got us figured out, I wanted to prepare my parents but she went against it." I heard the voice rant.

" ju-won?" I mumbled to myself. As if Ae-ra called me out in the night, with how perfectly timed it was, as if she knew, where I was in order to have it seen, she leaned in and kissed him, a simple kiss but then what happened next was the scene that annoyed me most, when he grabbed her arm and pulled her back in for another kiss.

I slowly stood up, I stood there, as a lost child, whether I was disappointed or relieved I wasn't sure I just ran back towards the house after throwing my shoe towards him. How childish we were. I was happier earlier if he had cheated but now seeing him kiss another made me realized I wish I never thought such a thing.

I felt someone racing after me, I ran faster I felt my heart sink out of confusion so I ran faster I ran until Hae-ju came towards and awaited before me with his back towards me.

" I won't even look at you. You can even cry until my back is soaked in tears, just get on, let's take you home." He said.

I took his words to heart, and I released my heart, I cried and continued to cry, I clutched onto Hae-ju's shirt, my eyes feeling warm from the raindrop of tears, my confusion increasing. My heart breaking. It seemed that I was placed into a situation even I wasn't aware of, here we are.

I decided to take a nap on his back, from what I remember. The next morning a beautiful Saturday morning I stayed to myself in my room, ignoring calls, and did just the same that Sunday. I cried alone in my bed room that night using my hand to cover my cries. Trying to muffle my own screams, I shivered and cried on the ground, beside my bed. It may have been those that would mock my emotions in that moment, but as if we were together for 5 years even if it was 5 minutes, what I witnessed, desperately hurt.

To hear him speak knowing I'd never be welcomed by his family, was that true? I don't know. Or if he said it knowing I was there watching.

I needed my heart to rest till I had to go to work the following day.

A week passed I became whom I was when I first began working, I did everything but interact with anyone. I neither wanted to tell Hae-ju what I saw.

It wasn't until the following Friday night when Hae-ju showed up at my front door with a bag of drinks in his hands, he let himself in.

" I've given you your space now let's celebrate." He said. We went to the balcony where we stood staring over the barrier facing the city life. " just think of your worry as you did at the rooftop release them here. " he advised.

I ignored his words so I didn't have to respond. As I always did. " let's just enjoy the stars for now I don't want to release worries then I'd be admitting to worrying."

He chuckled and shook his head in amusement. We drank that night. Bottle in hand arm rested on the railing staring up at the night sky with our unspoken problems tucked within the stars and the folds of the night sky.

What a tragedy the heart was on it's own was all I could keep thinking while staring from the sky, to Hae-ju.

From the sky to Hae-ju

from Hae-ju... to Hae-ju.