Forbidden Fruit

Chapter 28

LAUREN POV

I've been horrible. I know I have. Normani has done nothing wrong, but the fear of my parents finding out about us is crippling right now. The truth? I don't want to see her because I don't want to face leaving when they find out. Daddy is likely to appear at my apartment and drag me out kicking and screaming. It's one thing to find out your daughter is into women, but to know that she is dating her professor? He'll likely have a heart attack.

She has repeatedly asked me to talk since she outed us both, but I'm terrified. I'm terrified of what I might say, or what she might say. What if she won't stand by me if my family disown me? What if she denies that we have anything should my father track her down? What if this has all just been too good to be true all along? I can't deal with answering all of my own questions right now, and I cannot look into her gorgeous brown eyes. It hurts too much to know that one day I may not see them anymore.

I'm happy that Dean Anderson knows about us, I really am, but with that comes the terrifying possibility of being shunned by my own family. What the hell am I supposed to do?

Normani: Can you come by?

Lauren: Oh, are you sure you can fit me into your plans?

Normani: Come by, or don't. It's your call.

Lauren: I'll be there when I can.

That was wrong. I shouldn't have said that. Of course, she is pissed. I would be, too. I've treated her more than unfairly and I have a lot of explaining to do. She doesn't deserve to be avoided or ignored, I just know that I'm really struggling. I want nothing more than to be in her arms every hour of the day, but what's the point? What's the point when it will all turn to shit? It always does.

Slipping on my jacket, I grab my keys and my cell. I don't bother with an overnight bag, as I don't imagine I will be there too long. I'm fully expecting her to hand me my ass and then ask me to leave. I wouldn't expect anything less. I've acted childish, and when she has tried to gauge my feelings, I've brushed it off and gave her an 'I'm fine'. She's not stupid, we both know that, but still... she gave me the space and time she thought I needed, and two weeks later, I'm still acting this way. Two weeks later and she has been given nothing whatsoever. You need to grow up, Jauregui.

Slipping out of my apartment, I lock up and head off down the corridor. Taking the stairs, I figure I could use a little extra time to think. You are stalling. Move your ass. Quickening my pace a little, I reach the parking lot and slide into the driver's side. I don't need to drive, but I may not feel like the walk home depending on how tonight goes.

Within ten minutes, I find myself pulling up outside Normani's home. I've no idea how I got there, my head is full of all kinds of thoughts and I'd totally zoned out. As always, her home is brightly lit and welcoming. I only hope the atmosphere behind her closed door is the same. Honestly, I'm not so sure about that.

Cutting the engine, I remove myself from my car and hit the lock button. Slowly making my way up to her porch, I knock loudly and listen as footsteps approach. The door opening, my breath is stolen from my body as I catch sight of those brown eyes I've desperately missed. Sure, I see her most days on campus, but it's not the same. The way she looks at me isn't the same. I can see the hurt behind them. The uncertainty. The fear. The anxiety. Everything I don't want to see right now. "Hey." I breathe out and shove my hands in my pockets.

"Hi." She drops her gaze and focuses on the space between us. Stepping aside, she allows me entry and I quickly take her up on her offer. Just be honest with her. She would only want you to be honest. "Drink?"

"Sure. Um, Water or coffee would be great. I'm driving, so..."

"So... you aren't staying?" She sighs and moves towards the kitchen. "Okay." She gives a nod to herself and I close my eyes. "I mean, why would you? I'm surprised you're even here."