The Pursuit of Love

29.

Erika stood at the front of her sister's door, it had been 2 weeks that they had been out here with their father and they had yet to talk. They did whatever they could to avoid each other but Erika missed her twin. they were soo close and now they didn't even acknowledge each other. she was leaving to go back home in a few minuites and she didn't want her time here to be a waste.

she took a deep breath before deciding on knocking on the door.

"come in"

Erika slowly twisted the knob as she slowly walked into the room. her sister walked out her closet from hanging up some sweater she had recently washed. once she spotted her sister she sighed.

"hey" Erika spoke

"hey" erin sighed as she walked over to her bed and continued folding her clothes.

"uhh wheres Aiden"

"he went out, why your looking to sleep with him too?" she asked smartly.

"NO! Erin... i wanted us to talk get everything out on the table so we can get back to being sisters."

"dad put you up to this ?" she asked Erika

"no" she whispered

"so why you here? cause us going backto the relationship we had isnt happening..ever"

"I wanna talk to you, I don't like us being like this... I miss how we used to be Erin. I know what I did was wrong and this wasn't supposed to happen. I didn't plan to sleep with him he came to me, and things led to another. I would never intentionally hurt you and you know that. I always protected you. "

"how did yall even end up fucking? you had a whole man at school who you swore you loved"

"I was just being delusional, I was afraid he was playing me" she sighed

"wow and in the end, you played yourself, wow " Erin rolled her eyes as she walked back into her closet grabbing some more clothes to fold.

"look I know you pissed at me and you probably don't ever wanna see my face again. but I want you to know I'm truly sorry for what I did. I regret it every day of my life. I just want you to know that at the end of the day I know what I did and I haven't forgiven myself but I'm hurting too. you've seen what I've been through from the day mom left and how life wasn't always easy for me. but it seemed to always be easy for you. I was jealous. how no matter what happened the first thing people worried about was whether you were okay. I was never the kid dad worried about or anyone for that matter. Even after I told him I was pregnant he wanted me to get an abortion because he was afraid how hurt YOU would be. not how an abortion would affect me but he was worried about you and that's how my life has been forever. so I'm sorry I hurt you, it sorry I got pregnant, and I'm sorry that in your perfect little world you finally got to experience pain. " Erika cried

"life's always been easy for me? " Erin laughed walking out the closet shocked this was her sister's excuse for hurting her the way she did.

"you think I wanted to play ball in college? yes, I like the sport but I never wanted to play it in college. but once I got the scholarship dad wouldn't let me turn it down, due to him having to pay for your college tuition. and because I loved you I said okay ill go through this so my sister could continue her education and my dad wouldn't have to blow money he didn't need. when ma left that hurt me, I know dad and I was close but a girl still needs her mother. and then going off to college you always had friends because of how conversational and outgoing you were. people just wanted to be around me cause of who our father was. I want really good at making friends that's why Karin is my only friend, and then when I finally think I found the man of my dreams not only does he cheat on me with all these hoes, he gets my sister pregnant. The sister I helped get through our mom leaving us, the sister I have supported even when our family turned on her, the sister I spent my whole allowance on to buy her a car, the sister that swore she'd always protect me from getting hurt but never did I know I needed to be protected from YOU all along" she spoke with hurt in her voice as she whipped away tears.

"so sorry for feeling as though I don't owe you an apology or to not speak to you for the rest of my life.i just refused to be used by another person especially a person I was soo down for, someone I would literally take a bullet for. so sorry for protecting myself cause honestly when I found out I wanted to do more to you than just pack ya stuff up and put it outside. ya lucky you even got ya clothes back let alone undamaged. so this is the last time I'm talking about this fucking situation, I'm not going to try to rekindle our relationship until IM READY, I'm not moving on anyone else's time anymore. This is my life and I will decide when its the right time for me to put effort into this. okay ? okay," she said not allowing her the chance to respond.

Erika didn't have anything to say after that. she stood there for a few seconds before turning around and heading out her sister's room shutting the door on her way out. she walked into her room and grabbed her suitcase heading down the stairs. she met the driver at the car and got in as he placed her bags in the trunk before heading off to the airport.

Erin watched through the window as her sister hopped in the car before it drove off with tears in her eyes. she knew she was mad when she heard about the pregnancy between her ex and her sister. but once she saw her sister today standing in front of her with a belly that looked like it was going to pop with a child she was supposed to be carrying it hurt her to no end."

Aiden walked in a few minutes later with some cereal in a bowl munching.

"I want a baby" Erin blurted out causing Aiden to stop chewing staring at her lost for words.

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