Playlist Love (A Caspar Lee Fanfiction)

Chapter 52

Song For This Chapter - 

Christina Perri - Arms

"The world is coming down on me and I can't find a reason to be loved"

*Summer's POV*

My foot bounced up and down on the floor, my fingers drumming a rhythm on the table in front of me as nervous energy ran through me. My mother sat opposite, her next to perfect posture looming over my curled up, tense body. My eyes darted around the room in search of Caspar and my father, who were currently at the till, paying for the coffee's. I could tell they were in deep conversation, whereas my mother and I were sat in an uncomfortable silence. Her hands were placed neatly on the table in front of her, her perfectly red manicured nails contrasting against her pale skin. 

My hand was suddenly grabbed, the sound of paper cups being placed on the table. Caspar entwined his fingers with mine as he sat on the chair next to me. 

"Calm down." he whispered, placing our hands on top of my constantly moving leg. He pressed a kiss behind my ear before turning to face my parents, my mother who was intently watching our encounter, and my father who was inspecting his coffee. He took a sip before his face turned sour.

"Yuck." he spat. "Why do hospital coffee's always taste like feet?" 

His cup was pushed away from him, the sound scraping on the table.

"So..." my father began, looking between my mother and I. "Where would you like to begin?"

"The start. I want to know why you left us." I spoke, my voice monotone, my eyes remaining locked on my mother. 

She shifted uncomfortably in her seat before clearing her throat.

"We were in a tough place with money, Summer. Taking care of two almost teenage girls whilst trying to keep the family business going and balancing bills was difficult. Our best option was to leave. To leave you two in the care of your aunt, just until Olivia was old enough to be responsible for you both." She spoke, her voice professional and robotic. Not one ounce of emotion entered.

"So you left the country. You left to go to France. I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but moving to another country is way more expensive and dangerous than taking care of your own kids." I replied, Caspar's grip tightening on my hand. 

"You have to understand, your mother and I, we weren't...gah, how can I put this, we weren't emotionally prepared to take care of you at that time. We were on the verge of divorce, we didn't want your sister and you to have to choose between us." My father piped in.

"And with that you gave us no choice at all. You just left. No goodbye, nothing. Do you not realise how much I needed a parent at that time? Do you not realise what effect you've had on this family with your stupid actions?! You guys have never thought of anyone but yourselves! It was always what was best for you, what you wanted and what you needed. Never me. Never Olivia. You don't even deserve to be here right now." I spat, my voice raising with each sentence.

Caspar released my hand, his arm swinging round my waist to rub my back. He knew this action calmed me, my muscles tensing as I clenched my fists. My parents exchanged a look, both of them silent. The only sounds heard between the four of us was the soft rubbing of Caspar's hand on the material of my - well actually his - t-shirt and my heavy breathing. 

"I understand that you are angry at us right now, but you're still our daughter. And so is Olivia. Summer do you want to know the reason why we're here?" my mother asked, her eyes tired and defeated.