"YOU stupid idiot, you just started?? How disrespectful?" she yelled as she took something that looked like a long rod and hit me on my hands, legs, head. Tears welled up in my eyes but I had to control them not showing my weakness
.....
"Pakki??" h...
I reached the top floor and I realized that it was dark. Was it night already? I felt like I just woke up. That time I really wanted to see Farim so badly but seemed like there was only Saya. The tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down my face. I felt the muscles of my chin tremble like a small child and I look toward Saya, as if she could soothe me. There was static in my head once more, the side effect of this constant fear, constant stress I lived with. I heard my own sounds, like a distressed child, raw from the inside. It takes something out of me I didn't know I had left to give. That's the way it is when people are hard. It's like a theft of the spirit, an injury no other person can see.
Saya came rushing towards me. She was in the same room as me before so she knew what had happened. She hugged me tightly and said "nevermind Meeya. You know about your mom right. She is always like that. I bet she didn't mean it. She loves you". Although her words did calm me down but it did not change my perspective of my mom. I cried at her shoulders, wiping my mucus on her.
"Whhhaaaaat... happened? Pakki... Meeya.. Look at me!! Did she say anything about me? Did she compare me with you?" Farim came out of nowhere. I tried to close my eyes with my palms, not wanting to show my weak self.
He kept on repeating the same questions as he tried to open my hands. He was stronger than me so I gave in. He knelt down and saw my eyes which were facing down. He said "aww Meeya what are you crying for ma? Tell me! I'll help you" as he placed his ever warm hands on my cheeks and wiped my cold tears away. "No, it's not about you!!" I shouted, feeling angry and cold. He took a step back knowing that I was not in a good mood.
"Oh shit, what did I do!" I murmured as I cursed. "He is not gonna look at me the same way again!" I regretted.
"Meeya!! I'll be going home OK! You don't have to tell me now but I'll ask you again!" he exclaimed as he stomped down the spiral staircase and left.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Saya was standing there, literally blanked. She hasn't seen us talking like this before, like something going on between us.
I quickly wiped my ugly-nasty face with a wet towel and went to the kitchen downstairs and Saya followed me down. My Aunts were there cooking. "Do you want to eat dear?" big Aunt offered me 'thosai'. THOSAI is my all time favorite. Wherever I went I would order it with 'chutney' and 'sambar' as the side dish. I swear when you put a piece of that wonderful crispy thosai in your mouth, you will travel to heaven and come back just like taking a bite of 'Krabby Patty' in 'Spongebob'. Ok I know I am exaggerating but that is how much I love it. I immediately accepted the offer and enjoyed that delicious crispy thosai. Somehow it made me calm down.
I should not have raised my voice at Farim. He was such a sweetheart who just wanted to know what the reasons were for my sorrow. But I can't probably go and tell him "OH my mom pulled my armpit hair and that is why I'm crying" ?? He would think that I am a crybaby-psychopath. I was just annoyed at the fact that he was only concern about if my mom talked about him. As I was thinking and pondering about what I should do, I felt someone placing their hands on my cheeks.
