365 days of Darkness // Z.M.

Day 58

September 18th, 2009

I went to Mark's house that day, after school. I told my Mom it was for homework but... We didn't done them. We just sat on the couch and played video games. Which was nice, because I didn't had to think about too much stuff. That's what I wanted, by going there that night. I wanted to forgot about the shitty week I had. And I think he knew it. Because he didn't said a thing about the days I missed. I knew he wanted because... He's Mark, he always ask tones of questions. But not that day. 

- Kill that stupid zombie ! He screamed after a bit while I was pressing every buttons of the remote.

- I'm trying my best, k' ?

- Do better, you're gonna die !

- No, I... oh shit, yeah.

In fact, I had die. And Mark throw me his remote before starting to laugh. "We loose by your fault, AGAIN !" he shouted and I started to laugh with him. I always been bad at this game and he knew it. But we always had fun playing that, even though we were always loosing. 

I had a great evening with Mark. And I was feeling a bit better than in the morning. Until I saw that my Dad was back home. I bit my lips and got into the house. I tried to be subtle but he capted me in less than a second. 

- Zayn Jawaad Malik. In the living room. 

I swallowed and came there, giving him a shy smile. He got up of the couch, planting himself in front of me. 

- Your mom told me what happened. 

I looked down, he had a hard tone. And I was a bit afraid of his screaming. Because I knew it would happen. And I was right. 

- WHAT THE HELL WENT INTO YOUR HEAD, DAMN ! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED YOURSELF AND YOUR SISTER !

- AND YOU WANTED ME TO DO WHAT ? LETTING HER SPIT HER BLOOD ON THE FLOOR UNTIL SHE DIED ? 

- YOU COULD HAVE CALL SOMEONE !

- And who you wanted me to call ? I asked, feeling the tears coming into my eyes. Mom ? She was in an important meeting. Doniya ? Exams without cellphone. Neighbor ? Nobody was home. You ? Let me refresh your memory, you were in London.

- DON'T TALK TO ME ON THAT TONE ZAYN.

I blew, because I knew I was about to cry. And I ran upstairs and locked myself in my room. I could hear my dad screaming from the first floor, but I never came down. Because I wasn't feeling like being screamed at because I tried my best to help my sister. 

I wasn't able to sleep that night. Not at all. I just turned in my bed, again and again. And a couple of tears were rushing down my face. I wanted things to get back to normal. I wanted to kiss Eli in front of everyone. I wanted to argue over stupid things with Waliyha. I wanted my family to be a real one. I wanted to go to some parties with Mark. I wanted my life back. 

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So, how you're finding this entry ? Good or not ? For myself... I don't know x)