Afire Love // Dan Howell

Chapter 9

"Dan! (y/n)!" The old lady at the counter waves, "Nice to see you both!"

Dan chuckles and leans over the counter to give her an warm hug.

"Nice to see you too!" Dan grins.

"It feel like I haven't seen you two in years!" She says, putting her floury hands on her hips.

"It definately has been a while!" You say, looking at Dan.

"You have been coming here ever since you were just 10 years old - you used to get covered in sugar from the doughnuts! I'm surprised your teeth haven't fallen out!" She recalls, laughing.

"Well nothing's changed!" Dan says, "Can we get a couple of your finest sugary doughnuts to take away please?"

"Of course dear!" The small lady smiles, reaching out for a bag.

As she begins picking up some of the doughnuts off of the tray with a pair of tongs, you watch Dan as his dazzling brown eyes move around the room.

"Man, this bakery hasn't changed a bit!" Dan says, gaping at the frames on the walls and old-fashioned decór.

"No indeed it hasn't!" The lady responds, "My husband designed this place inside and out and I hope that in the future it stays that way! Although, it seems that in this day and age, there is always something 'better' that takes over..."

You see a frown appear on the lady's face and immediately feel sorry for her.

"Your husband did such a wonderful job! I'm sure no one will want to change this place - it just wouldn't be the same!" You tell her, giving her an assuring smile.

"Indeed and I'm sure he wouldn't have wanted a thing to be changed. This place is filled with memories! It's just a shame that some people are taken from life so quickly, leaving only the memories and nothing else!" She says, placing the bag of doughnuts on the counter.

"Just gotta make the most of it!" You grin, taking the bag of doughnuts and replacing it with a £5 note, "Right Dan?"

You turn to face Dan who is looking glumly at the floor as if he is thinking deeply about something.

"Right Dan?" You repeat, a little softer.

Dan looks up anxiously.

"Oh right yeah." He says, looking at the lady, "Thank you so much - we better get going."

Dan places his hand on your back and begins escorting you towards the doors of the bakery.

"Yes - bye hudears!" She calls out, "Thanks for stopping by!"

Bringing you out onto the street, Dan begins walking towards the park.

"Dan? What's up?"

Dan looks at you with no emotion whatsoever and then continues walking.

"The sky." He grunts sarcastically.

"Ha ha" You respond, rolling your eyes, "But seriously, it's like a switch keeps being flicked on and off which changes how you feel! You walked in that bakery as happy as larry and now you're walking out as if someone turned your wifi off! What's wrong?"

Dan just sighs and looks down at the bag of doughnuts.

"It doesn't matter right now" He mumbles, kicking a stone from underneath his feet, "Anyway, let's find some place to sit and eat these doughnuts!"

And there goes the switch again! Suddenly he is fine without an explaination. Will this ever stop?

Walking over to one of the park benches in front of the blossom trees, you cradle the bag of doughnuts and take in the warmth and sugary scent bringing you nostalgia. The lady in the bakery spoke about you going in there at just 10 years old and you remember that like it was yesterday! Everything then was perfect! You were happy and Dan was happy; despite the jam and sugar you were covered in, you didn't care - you just loved every second you spent with him.

Dan sits down on the bench, putting one leg over the other and pats the seat beside him. You sit down and feel his arm drape around you, sending a shiver up your spine. Trying not to show him the effect of his action, you rip open the bag and take the biggest sugary doughnut from the batch.

"Hey!" Dan giggles, "I wanted that one!"

"Aww shame!" You tease, taking a bite out of it.

"Bully." Dan jokes, playfully glaring at you as he takes out another doughnut from the bag.

You hear Dan moan as he takes a bite, which comes out pretty loudly and oddly sexual, making you looking at him with raised eyebrows. Dan just chuckles and shakes his head.

"Sorry but they're just so good!" He laughs, "Don't kink shame me!"

Failing yet again to not lick your lips after a few sugary bites, you and Dan laugh together as this used to happen all the time - you never succeded!

"The doughnuts beat us again!" Dan comment, smaking his lips.

Putting the remaining doughnuts beside you, you shuffle closer to Dan and lay your head on his shoulder.

"They sure did." You mumble.

"They were good times." Dan says, looking around at the familar scenery of the park.

"What happened to them Dan?"

There is a moment of silence as you both reflect on your favourite memories and realise that you have grown apart a lot since then and most of those memories have faded to grey.

"I don't know." Dan sighs, laying his down gently on yours, "I wish we could turn back time to when everything was okay."

"Yeah, but what makes now not okay?" You question.

"I guess we just chose different paths in life which makes a relationship difficult to work around." Dan replies, twiddling a strand of your hair around his finger.

"Life sucks." You complain.

"It seems that way sometimes." Dan says, "But actually, its more the things in life that suck. Once you face the chances of not being able to live anymore, you notice that there is a lot more to life that is worth living for."

You have been used to Dan's profound, deep conclusions growing up but this explaination seemed to be more of a personal thing to Dan. You were joking when you said that 'life sucks' because yeah it has it's cons but there are pros too. Dan however didn't take it that way.

Then it hits you.

He's not dying is he?

A/N Oooh and the thought sinks in! Is Dan dying or just getting deep? What is with the personality changes? Are you and Dan seriously growing apart? Let me know your thoughts and ideas in the comments! :D Thanks guys!

~ Katie :3