Bloody Paw Prints

Ch 32 Consuming grief

Darkness falls over the mountain, shadows form over the snow and around trees, stretching towards us as we all lay huddled in the snow. We’d been wresting for over an hour –I’d decided that it looked too fun not to join so I’d shifted and tackled Christian when his back was turn.

Despite the night settling in, I could see everyone easily, my wolf eyes sharp as a normal wolves would be. Wind blew against my side but I barely noticed with my think pelt keeping me warm.

Ally and Tori lye in the pile, still toying with each other like puppy’s too awake to sleep but too tied to run around. Christian lay on his back, pawing the air as if could catch the thousands of stars dotting the sky. Mikki rests next to Christian; her eyes closed but awake as she listened to the forest sigh and shiver in the wind. Ember lay a few meters away, watching the forest with restless eyes, she shifted every few minutes, unable to get comfortable.

Ash’s shoulder burns against mine, his skin searing as it touched me. It horrified me and amazed me how he had this effect. It was any of the other wolves the heat would be uncomfortable and make me fidgety. Ash’s touch however made me both restless and awaked a deep desire for more contact. I wanted to move away at the same time as move close, so instead I stayed still, letting the smell of the forest and the wolves wash over me, listened to the day wind down and the night stir into existence.

Out of nowhere Christian rolls over-nearly squishing Mikki who looks up startled by his swift movement. I turn my eyes to Christian curiously and could smell it in air from the others as they all trained their eyes on the wolf. Christian raises his nose into the air and a second later the sound of his howl fills the night, cuts through the night sounds and echo’s over the snow.

I sit up, my heart beating with want to add my over voice. I raise my nose and howl at the starry sky, adding my voice into the night. Mikki’s howl rises into the night, dragging out in a sorrowful tone. Tori’s howl arises into the night, high and loud and soon Ash and Ally were singing alone. I lower my nose to breath and spot Carson making her way outside, smiling as she hears us croon into the shadow world.

I raise my nose again, unable to stop myself if I wanted too. The need to howl burns through me, only dowsed when I am crying to the night, my voice revibrating through the world.

Max’s P.O.V (Irana’s brother)

I tighten my hold on the pencil at the sound of the wolves howling. Weeks ago I’d loved the sound of the wolves singing, I’d lay in bed at night, listening to them cry into the night, each wolf playing a different role in the song.

Now, I cringed against the sound, almost crippled with the pain that goes through me. I glance towards the window but I knew I wouldn’t see the murderous wolves outside. Pain stabs at my chest, prickles over my skin, filling me with hatred.

The wolves which my sister and I used to sit up listening together now aroused hatred. Irana would wonder into my room some nights and sit next to on the bed, and we’d talk about nothing for hours until we heard the first of the howls. They didn’t howl every night, so if it got too late Irana would walk out with a joke of why they weren’t singing. ‘Maybe they are a little shy tonight’ she'd laugh before closing the door.

Every night I’d wished for them to sing, but now I wished for them to be silent ghosts, nothing but a bad dream.

I press the heel of my palms to my closed eyes, cursing the wolves. “I hate you, I hate you all” I hiss, clawing at my hair. One night, that’s all it took. One night I had told Irana to tell mum I was gonna be late. I’d been going to a friend’s house, but that night, the night I didn’t walk home with her and wolves swoop in.

I’d come home to mum asking me where I’d been. I’d told her and not expected her to ask where Irana was. She’d never come home that night, and never would again. The next morning I had walked to school but only 10 minutes from the house I’d found bloody ice. The blood had lead into the forest where something- or someone- had been dragged. I didn’t need the police to tell me it was Irana’s, I already knew.

I look down at the sound of Shana whimpering. The Border collie sat beside me, uneasy from the wolves. She felt how I felt, edgy at the sound of the wolves howling. I place a hand on her head soothingly. My thumb runs over the scar on the side of her face from when one of the wolves had attacked her. She looks up at me with big brown eyes.

“You miss her too don’t you?” I say to the dog, almost expecting her to nod her head in understanding. But she didn’t, she just blinked.

The howls pierce the night, mournful as they sing. But they weren’t mournful, they were wolves, the same wolves that had attacked my sister and dragged her into the forest. I didn’t want to know what happened to her, I didn’t want to know if she’d screamed, I didn’t want to know if at the last second she’d blamed me for her getting killed.

I knew Irana wouldn’t blame me, but I wished she would. It’s was my fault, if I’d went home with her instead of ditching her then maybe she wouldn’t be dead. The wolves might have left her alone. Part of me knew that weather I was there or not wouldn’t have changed it but I needed someone to blame, and I couldn’t yell at the wolves.

I blink at the sound of something snapping. I open my eyes to see the pencil in two, jagged wood staring at me. I drop the broken pencil onto the table and stare at my homework which seemed so pointless suddenly. With a bitter sigh I grab all my books. “Come on, Shana, let’s go to bed” I say jerking my head towards my bedroom

The dog jumps up and heads for my room, her tail between her legs as the wolves sing into the night. I follow the dog, feeling cheated by the wolves. Once in my room I drop my books next to my back and head for bed. Shana jumps onto the end of the bed, a comforting reminder I hadn’t lost everyone when Irana had been killed. My mum may have been lost within the sorrow and my dad consumed by anger and pity, but Shana was still here, reassuring me that i wasn't alone