"So... You and Jack." Dad tells me in a question tone, while helping me take my luggage down the stairs.
"Yup."
"Is everybody's love life as complicated as yours now a days?" He asks me.
I laugh. "I hope not."
He hugs me.
"Are you sure you want to go to England for the summer? Don't you want to stay just a little bit more? So we can celebrate properly."
"Sorry, dad. It's just something I have to do." I hug him and the taxi driver honks announcing he has arrived to take me to the airport.
"I love you, Toby. And whatever happens... Follow your heart."
We hug again. "I love you too dad."
He kisses my forehead in a fatherly manner. "Be safe."
The anxious driver honks once again.
I wave my dad goodbye and carry my bags to the taxi, where we then head to the airport.
~
I meet Jack at the airport's Starbucks.
We hug and he immediately holds my hand bag for me.
"D'you want anything?" He asks pointing at the counter.
"No thanks."
"Okay."
He gets his coffee and we sit at the first empty table I can find.
"I can't wait to arrive in London. It is so beautiful there this time of year."
"It's always beautiful there." I reply.
He chuckles. "That's true." His alarm clock almost interrupts him, ringing from his pocket. "Oh! We have to go to check-in, and then go to our gate."
We stand up and do exactly as he says.
Our gate isn't opened yet, so we just sit on a random gate while we wait.
When we sit down he gets a little lunchbox full of M&M's and Kit Kat's, and offers me some. I smile.
"Are you happy?" He asks.
"Yeah."
He leans in slowly. I smile faintly, leaning in slowly too. He holds my cheek and kisses my upper lip.
"I'm happy when you're happy." He adds. "And I'm extra happy that you're giving me another try." I look down. "England is going to be wonderful."
"Flight 2189, to London. Gate number eight is open."
He stands up first, more confident than before, and offers me his hand.
"Shall we, sun?" He asks. I take his hand and we walk to the gate.
I feel his hands touching mine and then holding mine as we walk.
And I wish I could feel like Jack's hands belong right here, touching mine. But I don't. I feel like his hands shouldn't be touching mine. I feel like I don't want his hands holding mine.
I stop walking, and give up holding up my walls. I feel weak, and effortlessly let go of all the pretending.
He stops walking, and looks at me, hurt.
I cry.
I cry more.
"I can't." I tell him, in between hiccups. "I'm so sorry."
~
CZYTASZ
We Should Talk. (Book One)
Literatura KobiecaToby liked life uncomplicated, and she wasn't about to apologize for it. Her High School life had been alright, I guess. She had her twin cousins, and best friends, always by her side making things interesting. And that was enough. Or at least she t...
