We Should Talk. (Book One)

Spaghetti and Meatballs

POV TOBY

It's Sunday and we still haven't finished the project. We've barely even started it, as a matter of fact.

Gus is still here and we're trying to make something pretty out of cardboard cut letters, but obviously it won't work cause Gus is a mess and I'm no good with scissors.

The doorbell rings.

"I'll get it." I announce, and Gus moans- that's his way of saying "okay" when he's too lazy to mouth the actual words.

I open the door.

"Hello, beautiful." It's Jack.

"What are you doing here?"

"I want to talk to you. And since you've avoided me all week in school, I figured you wouldn't have a way to run away from your own house."

"A boy with a plan, are we?" I say.

He smiles. "I see your sarcasm is as sexy as always."

"And so am I."

He chuckles.

"Let's have some lunch, what do you think?"

I think about the consequences to that lunch.

But then, I remember that I wanted to talk to him, and that I should get over with it already.

"I'm thinking... Spaghetti and meatballs?"

He smiles. "The looks and the brain. I'm a lucky guy."

"Not that lucky." We both smile.

I never thought I'd be able to make jokes about our relationship, but everything has always been so easy and natural with Jack. I feel like we could still be friends, even after everything we've been through. 

"Gus, I'm going out!" I shout. I get my jacket and slam the door before he can answer anything.

If he knew I was going out with Jack, he wouldn't let me go in a million years.

~

Jack took me to a fancy restaurant.

My favorite Spaghetti in the whole City, and I can't believe he still remembers that.

I go along with the small talk until the food arrives, and then I decide I should just rip of the band-aid.

I sip my water and prepare myself for what's to come. "Jack, we should get through with this."

"We should."

"I--"

"I'll go first." He begins. "When I left, my heart was completely broken. I want you to know that I loved you when I left. I loved you so much. And I'd stay for you, but I didn't want to live a life of regret, so I went. I went, and now I came back. I only realized how much you meant to me when I didn't have you around... A lot happened while I was there. But everything is just so complicated between us. We have so much history... I'm not sure I'm ready to throw it all away."

"I'm not sure it's up to you." I answer quickly. "One minute we were talking about loving each other and our future together and the other you were gone."

"It wasn't like that. I wanted to talk to you before making any decisions. But you didn't answer me. You barely even heard what I had to say."

I sigh. "And I'm sorry about that. I really am. But I guess we have different definitions of love."

"What would you have done in my place?" He asks.

"I don't know." I answer.

"How would you have felt if it was with you and I didn't even hear you? If I just let you go as if you were nothing? If I just said "go!" And didn't even care if or when you'd ever come back?"

"I would feel terrible. But not much worse than how I did feel."

At this point we're just shooting questions and answers, not even waiting to think about what we're about to say.

"But what does this mean?" I ask. "What do you really want to say to me? I know there must be something stuck in your throat since the day you left."

"There was." He answers. "But now that we're here I can't quite remember what it is."

That's a lie.

There's something he was dying to tell me. Was. And now he's not so sure anymore.

"Fine." I say. "Then I guess that's it."

"Toby??" We hear. I turn around and see Gus, with a super angry expression.

"Gus, what are you doing here?" I ask, standing up. Lots of people in the restaurant stare at us.

Gus goes up to Jack and pushes him violently, and I break them up.

"GUS, STOP IT!" I shout, but he's out of control.

"You bastard!" Gus screams at Jack. "You have to stay the hell away from her, you hear me?!"

I'm between them stoping Gus from getting any closer to Jacks face, but he's really strong and I'm not sure I can hold him for much longer.

My heart is racing. "Gus, that's enough!! I'm good, I'm safe!! He didn't try anything, we were just talking!"

"Get the fuck away from us, you piece of shit!" Gus screams, and I see the restaurants security coming.

I look at Jack and he seems frightened.

"Gus, I didn't say anything!" He tells him, desperately.

"Why the hell are you so out of control?!" I ask Gus, loudly.

He lowers his tone so no one can hear him and stretches his neck to get closer to Jack's face. "If you won't stay away from her, I'll make her want to stay away from you." He says.

What does that mean?????

"What the fuck are you talking about?!" I ask Gus.

The security guards come and hold Gus, taking him out of the restaurant.

Jack tries to leave, obviously feeling terrible about what just happened.

I stop him. "What the fuck was that, Jack?! What the hell was that about?"

He puts one hand in his forehead and the other on his waist, looking like he's about to faint. "I can't do it anymore. There's something you need to know."